George Lopez Season 2 Episode 15

Angie:Are you going to going to Adam's?
George: If I tell you it'd be pre-mediated! Let me go while it's still a crime of passion!
Angie: You are not going anywhere!
Benny: She's right; I'll go. I got a bigger trunk and no plates!

Max: Mom, you say you love me, and you say you love the flower vase in the hall. If one of those things broke the other, would you still love me? You can think about it. (leaves)
Angie: Sell the boy.

Angie: I'm gonna call Adam's parents about this window right now.
Carmen: Adam didn't do it. Piper did.
George: Piper? That snob who used to be your friend?
Carmen: That's her handwriting. I know because she wrote "Carmen Can't Say No-pez" on my locker.
Benny: Hey, thank God our last name isn't Tucker.

Benny: (rushing in the house) Hey, you been pranked!
George: Not now, Mom!
Benny: No, I just want to see what it says. (pulling open the blinds) I couldn't read it backwards. (reveals Carmen Hopez spray painted on the sliding door)
Carmen: Oh, God.
Benny: Now I get it.
Angie: Why would somebody do this?
Carmen: It's Adam's fault. He lied and told some of his friends that I let him have sex with me. Now it's going around school that I'm a ho. That's why I'm not going to school, okay?
Angie: Honey, that's horrible.
George: Why the hell would he do that?
Carmen: He doesn't want people to know I broke up with him. He wants everyone to think he dumped me 'cause he got what he wanted.
George: That little punk. I thought I straightened him out last week.
Benny: I know just what you're going through. When I was in high school, they called me easy, cheap, loose...of course I was pregnant.

Carmen: You know what else happened today? A boy followed me in the bathroom and asked me if I wanted to do it!
Angie: Honey...
Carmen: Another boy pulled up my shirt when I was walking down the hall. Please don't make me go back, please!
George: It's okay, baby. We'll figure something out. Go upstairs so your mom and I can talk. (Carmen leaves)
Angie: She's not wrong. She can never get her reputation back.
George: I don't want to see her suffer like this for three more years.
Angie: Me either. What are you thinking?
George: Private school.
Angie: That's what I was thinking. Can we afford it?
George: No. We'll have to sell the boy.

Carmen: I got in a fight with Piper. She kept calling me a slut, then she pushed me.
Angie: Oh, my God. Are you all right? You have blood on you.
Carmen: That's Piper's.
George: Really?
Carmen: Yeah, I punched her in the nose.
George: Damn! My girl's a scrapper! Whoo!
Angie: George!
George: Come on. Let me have this. She drew blood.
Carmen: I didn't start the fight. I didn't even want to fight her, but ugh! She made me. You believe me, right?
George: We believe you, honey.
Carmen: Good. 'Cause Mr. Durango didn't. I'm suspended.
Angie: What? You're suspended? That's not right.
George: You see. I told you, Angie. He's paying me back by getting back at my daughter. You still think I'm being paranoid?
(Later, Benny walks in)
Benny: Hey, what's going on?
George: Carmen got in a fight, Mom.
Benny: Whoa. Look, you got blood on you.
Carmen: It's the other girl's.
Benny: Damn! My granddaughter's a scrapper!
(Angie stares)
George: Mom, we don't encourage violence in this house.
(George and Benny give each other a low-five)