(having a father-daughter talk while driving)
Carmen: Where are we going?
George: I just want to talk. And the first thing I want to say is I should've punished Max a lot more than I did.
Carmen: (sarcastically) Well, I should call the newspaper. "George Lopez Admits When He's Wrong."
George: (murmur) Be the adult, be the adult. Ok look, maybe I went easier on Max because I know why he peeped. I was a boy. I get that. I don't get you anymore. I did when you were a little girl 'cause you were just like a little boy except you never got caught on your zipper.
Carmen: Well, I'm not a little boy or a little girl anymore. I'd like a little privacy. And I'd like some respect.
George: That's fair.
Carmen: And I'd like my feelings listened to.
George: Ooh, that's a tough one.
George: Because everything's a crisis with you. There are no small problems. I'm on overload, Carmen. I mean, I thought teenagers were supposed to lock themselves in their rooms and never talk to their parents. I was kinda looking forward to that.
Carmen: Well, I'm sorry I tell you all my problems.
George: No, you shouldn't be. I have to get better at this.
George: Look, I promise to start listening to your feelings if you promise not to have so MANY of them.
George: And don't ever think I love Max more than I love you. 'Cause that's not right.
Carmen: (voice breaking) Okay.
George: Why are you crying?
Carmen: I'm happy.
George: (voice breaking) I got you this cell phone to make up for everything. Stop crying.
Carmen: (crying) Oh my god. It's a cell phone! (hugs George)
George: (crying; to the car beside him at the light) Hey, what are you looking at? We're feeling in here! Go, man! The light's green.