George Lopez

Season 5 Episode 14

The Kidney Stays in the Picture

Aired Wednesday 8:00 PM Feb 08, 2006 on ABC



  • Trivia

  • Quotes

    • (Angie disapproves of the advise George is giving Max about dating)
      George: I just want /max to do better with girls than I did in high school.
      Angie: If he dates one more girl, he'll double your total.
      George: How come no one believes I made out with Cindy Vigerola?
      Angie: Because she passed a flier around school that said "I did not make out with George Lopez."
      George: I'm not saying she didn't regret it, I'm just saying it happened.

    • George: My boy's becoming a man. He just found out that a girl likes him. Like, likes him.
      Ernie: Whoa, hey, good for you Max. Hey, just make sure its not a prank, though. 'Cause they're some people who write fake notes pretending to be a girl (he turn on George) just to get you to show up at the pep rally in shorty shorts and a MASHED SHIRT!
      George Dude, I thought you'd recognize my handwriting.
      Ernie: You made a fool of me in front of the whole school... but it was pretty damn funny.

    • Vic: I see no problem with Max dating. When I was his age in Cuba...
      George: Vic, I've had a long day. Just get to the last line.
      Vic: Well the chicken lived, but the girl had to where an eye patch for the rest of her life.

    • George: Kissing is one thing, but you don't ever say "I love you" to a girl. That's like covering yourself in bloody meat and jumping into a shark tank.
      Angie: George.
      George: I'm teaching our son. (to Max) You don't say "I love you" until you find the one shark you wanna spend the rest of your life with.

    • Max: Alright Mom, where's this dinner that's SO important that you had to get all up in my stuff?

    • Angie: You're not going to Lake Take-Your-Top-Off, and that's final.
      Carmen: Oh, so I can't go to a simple party on the lake, but the second you leave the room Max and his girlfriend can make out like monkeys?
      Carmen: Oh, did I say that out loud? I get gossipy when I'm oppressed.

    • George: (after finding out about Max's kidney) Angie, what was I thinking? My dad died of kidney disease. Max has my bad genes.
      Angie: He's got both our genes, George.
      George: Well, look, if he unexpectedly dies from soft hair and long eye lashes then it'll be your fault, this one's on me.

    • Benny: Hey, I protected you plenty of times. Remember that time I threw my body over yours in that car accident?
      George: Mom, your door didn't work, you were trying to get out by climbing over me.
      Benny: Since when does it make you a good mother to die with your son.

    • Angie:Why are your sheets wet?
      Max: You should be told the truth mom, (looks around)Carmen got into my room and peed on my bed.

  • Notes

    • Jim Hope was nominated for the 2006 Humanitas Prize for "30 Minute Category" for this episode.

    • From 8:00-9:00 p.m., opposite Fox's "American Idol" ABC freshman comedy "Freddie" built on its "George Lopez" lead-in by 10% among Adults 18-49 (2.2/6 vs. 2.0/5).

  • Allusions