Thurston Howell III
Jonas Grumby (The Skipper)
Eunice Wentworth 'Lovey' Howell
Mary Ann Summers
When Gilligan goes to sleep with the Howells, Thurston tells him he doesn't snore. But in "The Matchmaker" this was stated as one of his bad habits.
Lovey: Thurston, it hurts.
Thurston: When I laugh, it hurts.
Lovey: Such pain.
Skipper: Oh come on. I don't know what you folks are complaining about. This makes two shots for me.
Lovey: But you're bigger than we are.
Professor: At least none of you had to give yourselves a shot.
Professor: Hello, Gilligan. Are we all ready for our vaccine?
Gilligan: You're not gonna stab me with that thing?
Skipper: Oh come on, Gilligan, that needle just looks big.
Gilligan: That's because it is big. That's not a needle, it's a harpoon.
Thurston: Come now, Gilligan. What are you, a man or a mouse?
Gilligan: Squeak, squeak, squeak.
Professor: Gentlemen, I've got good news. I've finally developed a vaccine for the Gilligan allergy.
Skipper: Well good for you.
Skipper and Thurston: You what?!
Skipper: Did you hear that, Mr. Howell? Great news, Professor. I'm gonna go get my little buddy.
Thurston: Little buddy to you, but he's my little golf cart.
Mary Ann: Oh Ginger, you have so much perfume on, all I can smell is you.
Ginger: Well naturally. If I can't find Gilligan, I wanna make sure that Gilligan finds me.
Skipper: Isn't it amazing. I just realized everybody's here and nobody's sneezing.
Thurston: And why, should we be? Gilligan's not around.
Skipper: Yeah, that's right. Say, come to think of it, I wonder where Gilligan is.
Mary Ann: Skipper, look at the note I just found pinned to the supply hut.
Skipper: "To whom it may concern, and everybody else, I will never, ever again make any of you sneeze, cry, itch, or other things anymore because I am moving to the other side of the island to love out the rest of my life by myself or maybe even become a hermit. Sincerely, Gilligan."
Thurston: How very thoughtful. Remind me to send the dear boy a care package.
Lovey: Oh Thurston, isn't this exciting?
Thurston: Yes, it is. However, I doubt that sniffing the captain will ever replace polo as the national pastime.
Ginger: Can you imagine someone testing me to see if I could be mistaken for a boy?
Mary Ann: You better take off those earrings. Gilligan seldom wears bells that tinkle. Gilligan, don't look so downcast. The world isn't coming to an end.
Gilligan: It might as well be. My best friend can't stand me. I don't know whether it's accidental or on purpose.
Skipper: Do you really think this is all in my mind, Professor?
Professor: Let's put it this way, Skipper. It's possible for an allergy to be psychological instead of physical.
Skipper: But that's ridiculous. I like him. Gilligan is a friend of mine.
Professor: But you do admit that he annoys you from time to time.
Skipper: But I don't dislike him. It's just that I'd like to kill him every now and then.
Professor: Well we'll soon find out. If the others file through and you're blindfolded and you sneeze only at Gilligan it will prove conclusively that you're allergic to him for physical and not mental reasons.
Skipper: Professor, do you really think that I'm allergic to Gilligan?
Professor: Well it's probably not Gilligan himself. You know that while there have been rare medical cases where one person was actually allergic to another, in this instance, I feel it's probably something on Gilligan's person which has triggered your allergy.
Skipper: Sure, it's got to be. I mean, it's ridiculous that I'm allergic to Gilligan. I mean, we've been buddies for years.
Thurston: Lovey, we must find out what the poor captain is allergic to.
Lovey: Well ,maybe he's allergic to my collection of jewelry.
Thurston: Oh please. Those diamonds I bought you are nothing to sneeze at, believe me.
Lovey: You know Thurston, the whole thing is ridiculous. After all, the Skipper has a common allergy, and we don't own anything common. Except, of course, our common stocks.
Professor: I checked you out thoroughly, Skipper. There is no evidence of tropical disease.
Skipper: That's marvelous, Professor.
Professor: Now I'll have to look for some other type of disease.
Skipper: That's terrible.
Professor: However, I'm sure it can't be too serious.
Skipper: Oh, that's wonderful.
Professor: But still, an undiagnosed illness could prove to be fatal.
Skipper: Back to terrible again.
Professor: I'm sorry to have to tell you that you probably have communitus allergititis.
Skipper: I do? I knew it. I knew it. Professor, now, straight from the shoulder. Come on, now. How much longer do I have to live?
Professor: Well, I'd say about more years.
Skipper: 40 years?
Professor: Yes. Communitius allergititis is merely a fancy word for allergy.
Skipper: Well Professor, I'm sure glad I've got….Whatever, that, you know, that you just said. I'm so happy, Professor.
Professor: By the way, the girls are making a net for your Ping-Pong table out of sugarcane.
Skipper: Out of sugarcane?
Skipper: Now, that's a great idea. In case we get tired of playing Ping-Pong we can always eat the net.
Gilligan: Hey, Skipper. Take it easy. Nobody ever died from a little itching and sneezing. Have they, Professor?
Professor: Unfortunately, Gilligan, these symptoms may be an indication of something far more serious.
Gilligan: Like what?
Professor: Well according to this book on tropical diseases it could be very serious.
Theme of episode: A friend in need is a friend indeed.
The establishing shot is similiar to "Ghost A Go-Go," the previous episode.
User Score: 1085
User Score: 489
User Score: 115
User Score: 104
User Score: 61
User Score: 45
User Score: 37
User Score: 33
User Score: 22
User Score: 18
User Score: 18
User Score: 15
User Score: 13
User Score: 12
User Score: 10
User Score: 9
User Score: 9
User Score: 8
User Score: 8
User Score: 8