Gilligan's Island

Season 2 Episode 22

Forward March

Aired Saturday 8:30 PM Feb 17, 1966 on CBS



  • Trivia

  • Quotes

    • Thurston: (to Gilligan) For extraordinary valor in facing the enemy that out weighed you at least 600 pounds I proudly present you with the Order of the Diamond Cufflink.

    • Professor: You know, I had a good look at that ape.
      Gilligan: Yeah. He was looking at me real good, too. Real hungry-like.
      Professor: It's one of that rare breed, who like the rattlesnake of the genera Crotalus can actually be stared into immobility.
      Skipper: Oh you mean, if you keep looking at him, he'll keep looking back.
      Professor: That's right. If you don't move, he won't move. It's kind of like hypnosis.
      Skipper: Wish me luck, boys.
      Professor: No, wait a minute, Skipper. I'll do the staring. We need your strength to carry one of those boxes.
      Gilligan: Well Professor, you better pick up the other box too. I can't budge either one of them. And besides, I'm a good starer.
      Skipper: I wish there were another way.
      Gilligan: Honest, I really am a good starer. I once stared at a man-eating tiger for two hours and 20 minutes and he didn't bite me.
      Skipper: But Gilligan, that tiger was behind bars. And that ape isn't behind any bars.
      Professor: However, if you remain frozen, he'll remain frozen.
      Gilligan: Well I got a good start. I got cold feet already.

    • Skipper: We've got to get that ammunition away from [the gorilla].
      Professor: The ape was obviously on the island during the way. He saw the soldiers using the weapons and decided that's the way men play together.
      Skipper: He's liable to start playing again while we're sitting down at dinner or swimming in the lagoon.
      Professor: We've got to get into that cave.
      Gilligan: Maybe there's a back door.
      Skipper: Certainly, and a basement andSkipper: three bedrooms and two baths.
      Gilligan: I don't think it's that big.

    • Skipper: That's just dandy. Who ever has those grenades has a machine gun, too.
      Professor: I wonder why they stopped firing.
      Skipper: I don't know. They could've picked us off like sitting ducks.
      Professor: I can't see anything.
      Gilligan: You can come up now, Mr. Howell.
      Skipper: Yes, that is unless you're frozen down there.
      Thurston: I'm listening for the sound of approaching horses, a trick I learned from General Custer.

    • Thurston: The military thing is to come to attention when your superior officer enters a room.
      Lovey: You mean you're superior to me? I don't think I like that, Thurston.
      Thurston: Lovey, let's just say that I outrank you.
      Lovey: I'm not certain I like that, either.
      Mary Ann: Good for you, Mrs. Howell.

    • Thurston: Professor, as commanding general, I appoint you chief of intelligence.
      Professor: Well thank you very much, General.
      Thurston: And Skipper, in spite of your insurgent attitude I'm gonna make you secretary of the navy. On your shoulders will rest all our naval problems.
      Skipper: Yeah, well thanks a lot, Mr. Howell. We haven't even got a boat.
      Thurston: That's your problem.
      Gilligan: When you get one, I'll enlist.

    • Lovey: Don't loiter, Gilligan. Surrender and be back on time for lunch.
      Gilligan: Yes, ma'am.

    • Lovey: Gilligan, this ought to do nicely for a white flag.
      Gilligan: One of Mr. Howell's good shirts?
      Lovey: Yes, with the family crest: Crossed dollar bills on a field of Swiss banks.
      Gilligan: Take these cuff links. They must cost a fortune.
      Lovey: Gilligan, one mustn't talk of money at a time like this.
      Gilligan: One mustn't?
      Lovey: No, it's neatness that counts. Now, French cuffs flopping in the breeze would be terribly sloppy.

    • Thurston: Sorry I'm late, gentlemen.
      Skipper: Please Mr. Howell, we're trying to think this thing out.
      Thurston: I know exactly what to do. Demand immediate and unconditional surrender.
      Skipper: But we don't know who for how many. How can we ask them to surrender?
      Thurston: I don't mean them .I mean us. Have either one of us go to the lagoon carrying a while flag.
      Professor: That may not be a bad idea.
      Skipper: What? Give up without defending ourselves?
      Thurston: Immediately, before one precious drop of Howell blood is spilled.
      Skipper: Well nobody is pushing me around. If it's a fight they want, I'll give it to them.
      Professor: Whoever they are Skipper, they've got hand grenades and discretion is sometimes the better part of valor.
      Thurston: Discretion is always the better part of valor.
      Skipper: I'm still for fighting to the last man.
      Professor: What about the women?
      Skipper: Oh I forgot about them.

    • Skipper wrote "steak" in the sand.
      Gilligan: How do you like your steak done?
      Skipper: Rare with onions and friend potatoes. Hello, Gilligan. I'm just sitting here daydreaming.
      Gilligan: Don't you like bananas and coconuts anymore?
      Skipper: Gilligan, I'm sick of bananas and coconuts. That's all we ever eat.
      Gilligan: I like bananas. You want one?
      Skipper: Gilligan, I told you I wanted something different like a steak or lamp chops or fresh celery and carrots and….
      Gilligan: Do you like avocados?
      Skipper: Avocados? You've got an avocado?
      Gilligan: One just flew over and landed in the bushes.
      Skipper: One just flew over and landed in the bushes? Let's get it. (The "avocado" is really a grenade.) Let's get out of here.

  • Notes

  • Allusions