A very great episode.
10
"Perfect"
When the episode opens, it is early in the morning at Lorelai's house. Lorelai is sneaking out of the bedroom when Luke wakes up and wonders what she's doing. "Did I wake you? 'Cause I brushed my teeth in the shower so you wouldn't hear the sink run.Then it occurred to me that you could probably hear the shower running, so that defeated the purpose of the whole shower/toothbrush combo." Lorelai says. "Why are you up so early?" Luke asks. "Oh, you know me." She says. "I do. So, why are you up so early?" Luke asks again. Lorelai answers that has early morning chores. "Just milking cows, feeding chickens. Slopping pigs.They're certainly not going to slop themselves." Lorelai jokes. "You're being evasive." Luke tells her. She tries to say that she's just trying to be mysterious, so that he'll still find her interesting a hundred years from now. "I'm not being evasive. I'm trying to remain mysterious so you still find me interesting a hundred years from now." Lorelai tells him. After asking Lorelai where she is going again, she tells him that she had made plans to meet Sookie at the flower mart but had forgotten to call her to cancel. Luke says he is sorry and offers to helo cancel stuff but Lorelai replies, "No, it's fine. I'm a great canceller. I'm so smooth. People think I'm still going to show up. I'm good." Luke gets up to give her a kiss goodbye, but since he obviously can't see in the dark, he knocks his head into her nose. Luke apologizes but Lorelai tells him she's fine. "It's okay. It hurts so good, as Mr. Mellencamp says." She pats his arm and leaves.
After the credits, Lorelai meets up with Sookie at the flower place and tells her that the wedding has been postponed.Sookie's once happy face falls, she looks at Lorelai and says, "What did you do?" Lorelai taken aback by Sookie's comment replies, "What did I do?" Sookie starts a series of questions. "Did you get cold feet? You can't get cold feet! We need to put some nice wool socks on those feet because Luke is perfect for you! He waited for you to get over Christopher. He waited for you to get over Max." Lorelai tries to stop her but Sookie keeps going. "Why do you do this? Why do you want to make yourself miserable?" Lorelai finally tells her that Luke has a kid and she doesn't get it. "A kid like a goat?" Sookie asks. "A kid like a daughter! She's twelve years old, he found out a few months ago and he just told me about it yesterday." Lorelai says, sounding a little annoyed.
Sookie gets a horrible thought. "What if Jackson has a love child? I saw this kid wandering around town the other day. He looked exactly like Jackson. And his voice was exactly like Jackson's! Plus, he was holding a banana, so I think he likes fruit!" She says panicking. Lorelai rolls her eyes and tells Sookie Jackson doesn't have a son he doesn't know about. "Hey, you think Luke's the only one with a past? You think Jackson was a monk when I met him? He had seed and he passed it around." Lorelai is hurt by this comment and Sookie says she is sorry. Sookie asks how Luke is. "He's just trying to deal. I mean, he wants to do the right thing by April. That's her name. April. He's just trying to figure everything out and the wedding was coming up so fast, we just decided to postpone it for a while." Lorelai tells her. She says she has to cancel everything and Sookie offers to help. "You know, maybe I shouldn't cancel everything right away. I mean, I still have some time before I lose my deposit on the hall. Maybe I should just chill out and, and see what happens. Is that crazy?" Lorelai says to Sookie. "No it's not crazy." Sookie says. Lorelai says they should get coffee then turns to Sookie. "Hey, are you talking about that Arnaz kid?" She asks. Sookie tells her that's the one. "Boy, he does talk like Jackson. That's weird." Lorelai realizes. "I told you so." Sookie says.
At Yale, Rory is walking and writing things down on her notebook at the same time. Logan calls out to Rory before she runs into a trash can. "I don't remember that being there yesterday." Rory says puzzled. "Yesterday you came from the other way so you missed the trash can but you almost took out the bike rack." Logan tells her. "Thank God I have a guardian angel hanging out by the coffee kiosk." Rory jokes. "Well, it's the only place that's safe to stand with a maniac like you walking around. Plus, here I'm guaranteed to run into you at least three times a day," says Logan."You've been hanging out at this coffee cart every day for a week." Rory notes. "Yes, it's sad. I'm officially a wuss. If I saw me doing this, I'd beat the crap out of myself." Logan says. Rory tells Logan he's too slick for his own good. "Excuse me, but this is not slick. This is a Nora Ephron movie. Louis Armstrong should be warbling as we talk." Logan tells her. He reminds Rory that she promised to let him take her to dinner, and she way too easily suggests that they go out Thursday night. "Do not think of backing out, because I will cry and eat a pint of Rocky Road while watching 'An Affair to Remember' with Rita Wilson." Logan tells her. Rory says she can't wait and she starts to walk while looking down at her notebook. "Eyes on the road!" Logan calls after her.
Lorelai arrives at her house and sees that Paul Anka has once again rearranged her bookshelves. "Oh, seriously? You know, some dogs dig! It might be a nice change of pace." She tells the empty and presses the button on her answering machine. She starts to clean up the books as a message from Babette plays. "Hey, sugar! I heard some terrible crashing sound coming from your living room today. I tried to get in, but Luke fixed the back door so you can't jiggle it off the hinge anymore! You should really talk to him about that, sweetie! Anyhow, I hope everything's okay! Call me later if it's not, bye-bye, Toots!" The machine beeps and Richard's voice comes on. "Lorelai, it's your father. I'm calling to tell you there's been a little mistake with Rory's tuition at Yale." Lorelai straightens up and looks concerned at this. "It seems our check was returned to us. For whatever reason, they did not cash it. Now, don't worry. I'm sure it's just some clerical mix-up. I've been on the phone with the bursar's office all morning. I'm currently waiting for a call from a Mrs. Lynwood, and then I'm sure I will get this all cleared up. Tell Rory not to worry. If anyone gives her any trouble, tell them to call me." Lorelai picks up her phone and dials a number.
Rory is sitting at a table when her phone rings. She picks up her phone and says hi to Lorelai. Lorelai makes a comment that Rory has her study voice and tells Rory about the call from Richard. "He called to tell me that Yale returned his check. He thinks it's a clerical error." Lorelai tells her. Rory says it's not an clerical error. "They're going to find out, kid." Lorelai says. "Yup." Rory simply says. "You getting charged by the word on your calling plan?" Lorelai ask." What do you want me to say?" Rory asks her back. She tells her she has nothing to tell her grandparents. "Rory, they're going to find out that Christopher's paying for Yale. And they're not going to like it. It's going to go over badly. It's going to be the opening night of Taboo all over again." Lorelai tells her. "They had to find out eventually, Mom." Rory says not worried about it at all.
"Shouldn't they find out from you, and not some office clerk at Yale?" Lorelai asks."What's the worst that could happen? We won't be speaking anymore? Gee, that would suck." Lorelai is surprised at the comment. "Wow. Ice, ice baby." Lorelai reacts. "Sorry", Rory apologizes. "Not trying to be cold. But I don't think I should feel guilty because I want my father to pay for college." "No, you shouldn't," Lorelai agrees. But my parents do have feelings. You saw my mom when the gardener butchered her box hedges." Rory says she'll send them an email. Lorelai encourages her to call, but Rory doesn't have time to think about it for she opens the Yale Daily News to find a huge blank box where a picture should be. There is a large-type note in it reading 'Photo to come - Paris to approve' written across it."Oh, no!" Rory shouts. "What 'oh, no'? You saw a rat, 'oh, no', or you cut off your thumb 'oh, no'?" Lorelai asks. "Pairs!" Rory says. "Oh, no." Lorelai replies. Rory tells her she'll have to call her back and hangs up.
At the Yale Daily News, Paris is losing it. She screams at the reporters about the way they are working. "The research is sloppy, the sources are unreliable, the font is wrong, the paper feels thin, and the by-line should read 'Story by a petulant two-year-old who had one too many Black and Tans last night and so this is what you people get to read'! Fix it!" She demands and Rory walks in holding the paper. She asks why there is a missing photo in the paper. "Our pictures have sucked eggs lately and so I sent out two photographers to cover the same story. They each came back with about forty of the crappiest pictures ever to be committed to film! Completely unusable." Paris says. "It was supposed to be a picture of a football game. Was there one with a guy in a helmet holding a ball? Because that's really all you need." Rory tells her. Paris tells Rory, "They were predictable and standard. Cover of the Harvard Crimson after the big game? Guy with helmet holding ball. Stamford game, guy in helmet holding ball. I wanted something more, okay? Something that really said something about the game!" Rory just looks at Paris. "Like 'we forgot to go'?" She says confused. Pairs keeps talking, "And then, of course, when the temperamental 'artistes' found out I had double-booked the gig, they threw Naomi Campbell-level hissy fits and quit!"
Rory sighs. "Paris, we cannot be publishing papers that have blank spots in them! And we cannot have all our photographers quit, because there's not an endless supply of them!" Paris rolls her eyes. "Oh, please. How hard is it to look through a hole and push a button? I can do it myself! How are you doing on your story?" She asks Rory. "Fine." Rory tells her. "You'll have it first thing tomorrow morning." Seeming happy at this statement, Paris says, "Finally. One person I can count on." She goes over to Bill's desk and puts some papers on it. "These need more work." She tells him and leaves. Bill turns to Rory, "She's out of control. She's a mad dictator. She's the kind of dictator they don't just like to kill. She's the kind they like to drag through the streets and then hang from a lamppost for a month and a half." He complains about Paris. Rory asks where everyone else and he says that they are out sick. "There's an awful lot of sickness going on around here lately." Rory states. "Yes there certainly is and there's probably going to be a lot more, very soon." Bill tells her. Paris walks back over to Bill's desk, stands in front of him, rips up papers, throws them into the air, and stomps off. Bill sighs, defeated.
At her house Lorelai calls her parents. They both pick up different phones and Lorelai tells them that there wasn't a mistake with theYale check. "There wasn't?" Richard asks puzzled. "They sent you back your check because Yale has already been paid for." Lorelai tells them. "By whom?" Emily says. "By Christopher!" Lorelai happily answers. "Christopher who?" Emily asks. "Christopher Isherwood. That Cabaret money was burning a hole in his pocket and you know one Christopher, Mom! His grandfather passed away recently and left him some money and he just wanted to do something for Rory! He was trying to be a dad for once. I thought it seemed like a good idea." Lorelai tells her and Emily hangs up her phone, obviously angry. Richard tells Lorelai that Emily had to go. "Oh, Dad, please don't read too much into this." Lorelai tells him."I mean, when was the last time Christopher wanted to do anything for Rory? He wants to contribute. This is a good thing! This is not a snub. Dad, I swear. Rory and I are so grateful for everything you and Mom have done. All the help you've given her. She would not be at Yale right now if it weren't for you, and she would never have gone to Chilton. She would have graduated Stars Hollow High and then gone to a community college and then beauty school!" Richard says he wished Lorelai told him this before he called everyone bursar's office a moron. Trying to make the moment less tense, Lorelai replies, "Well, if it'll make you feel any better, you know, odds are at least two of them truly deserved it." Richard laughs.
At Yale, Lorelai and Rory leave the dinning hall. Lorelai is wearing a scarf and hat of many different colors. "I can't believe you didn't dress crazy like we agreed." Lorelai tells her. "We never agreed to dress crazy." Rory informs her. "What are you talking about? We did so! On the phone last night when we made our lunch plans." Lorelai insists. "You saying 'hey, let's dress crazy' does not equate to us agreeing to dress crazy." Rory says. After getting more coffee and talking about Logan, Lorelai tells Rory that she talked to her grandparents. "Oh, so now they're my grandparents." Rory remarks. Lorelai tells her that she told them about Yale and when she asks Rory if she wants to know how they took it, Rory says no. Lorelai tells her anyway. "They took it great. Mom practically broke the phone, she hung up so hard, and Dad, well, Dad was solemn. Quiet. Sad. It was a huge success." Rory shugs and Lorelai replies, "Okay, here's how I see it. You and your grandparents are at a huge crossroads. A precipice, if you will. They are the Bridges of Madison County and you are Meryl Streep." Rory starts to talk but Lorelai stops her. " I'm serious here. I know you and your grandparents are playing the 'who can freeze out who the longest', which I know can be fun, but if you ever hope to have a relationship with them again then someone needs to make the first move. I remember the first Christmas after we left Hartford, we were at the Independence Inn and I got an invitation to their annual Christmas party, and I didn't go. And that one move defined our entire future relationship! I mean, if I'd gone it would have been awful, but I would have broken the ice and maybe, and I know this is a big maybe, but maybe we would have been a tad closer than we are now, or could ever hope to be." Lorelai goes on and says she made plans with Richard and Emily for a Friday night dinner. Rory is shocked and tries to back out but Lorelai won't let her. "Rory, Mom already said she's really into this. You can't back out now." Rory gives in and agrees to go to the dinner.
Rory walks into the News Room and Bill is there along with a few people. Rory asks where everyone is and Bill tells her everyone quit. Rory says she needs to finish her paper and she says that Bill can help her, but he quit too."I bowed out. I actually bowed. Physically bowed." He says. Rory looks at him. "Well, if you quit then what are you doing here?" Bill laughs. "Are you kidding? I'm going to have a ringside seat for the event of the century. Tonight will be the first time ever, in the history of the Yale Daily News, that the paper does not come out.D-day? The paper came out. Kennedy gets shot? The paper comes out. But three months of the Gellar Reign of Terror, and the whole damn institution comes tumbling down."
Angry at him, Rory leaves and goes into Paris' "bunker". When she enters, she sees that the walls are covered in paper. Paris is freaking out. "No one can write a lead. No one!" She yells. Rorys asks her if she has idea what's going on and Paris says that she can't think about it now. "Paris, the paper's not going to come out." Rory tells her. "Of course it is! I'm working on it! I can do it alone! I've been doing it alone for months! No man is an island, but this woman is!" Paris snaps."I've got it all scheduled out! As long as I stick to the schedule, everything's going to be fine. I'm finishing up a review of the drama club's production of Sweeney Todd now, then nine-thirty to ten I'm going to finalize the layout. Ten to eleven, copy editing, eleven to twelve-thirty -" Rory interrupts her. "Paris, there's like a hundred hours of work on this, and five hours till the paper comes out!" Rory tells her. "I'll get it done!" Paris says. "Well, you'd better get bitten by that radioactive spider pretty damn fast here!" Rory shouts at her. "I'll get it done! I just have to focus and stop allowing myself to be distracted! Don't distract me!" Paris screams at Rory.
Rory leaves and goes back into the news room where Bill is playing with a yo-yo. Rory stands in the middle of the room and claps her hands. "Okay! Everyone, listen up! We have work to do! You, t-shirt, you're doing layout. And you, saggy pants, get all the heeler's numbers, call them and tell them to get in here. They've just been promoted. And Tali, I need Sheila and Joni's numbers ASAP! Come on, people! Move! We've got a paper to get out!" She demands and the few people walk around and start to work.
In Stars Hollow, Lorelai and Sookie at coming home to Lorelai's house. Sookie is going to take the dog home for the night to give her family a dog test-run. Lorelai tells Sookie to keep Paul Anka occupied while she puts on his leash because he freaks out if he sees it. "He's totally fine having his personal freedom slowly stripped away, just as long as he's completely unaware that it's happening. Just like a true American." Lorelai says. As Lorelai hits her message button, and Luke's voice comes on. He's says that April is coming to the diner tonight until 8, and so he'll see Lorelai after 8. "After 8," Sookie repeats, and Lorelai looks embarrassed. "Yeah, that's what he said." Lorelai says. Sookie says that she guesses they decided that Lorelai won't meet April just yet. "Yeah," Lorelai says. "I guess we did." Sookie cringes, and asks if Lorelai wants her to leave Paul Anka. Lorelai says no, Sookie should take him, and that she's great. "You are?" Sookie asks. "Yeah, I guess that's what we decided." Lorelai tells her.
Lorelai goes over to the the soda shop to spy on Luke through the glass. There is a long line of people wanting to get free chocolate. Babette comes in and pushes Lorelai to the front while she grabs some free chocolate for both of them. Lorelai tries to sneak back to the window to watch Luke, but Babette and Patty stop her. Lorelai is mortified to find out that the whole town knows about April. "That was page one news around here for a week. So what's the scoop?" Babette says. Miss Patty says that April looks like a reader, and that she can't imagine Luke with a reader. They go on and on about how they can't even imagine Luke with a kid. "He's not a hundred-year-old eunuch, or anything." Lorelai says. Other people crowd around the window and the rumors begin to fly. They ask if April and Anna want money from Luke, if he's going to try to get custody; if they're really sure it's even his kid, and make further jokes about the unlikelihood of Luke's having a child who reads books. Being unable to take anymore, Lorelai leaves. Luke looks over to the window and sees everyone looking at him and April. He shakes his head at them.
Rory runs around the news room at Yale giving people comands. Shelia tells Rory that Russell, the printer guy called and said they are losing their spot. Rory calls Russel and begs him to give them more time. "What's this I hear about us losing our spot? Yes. Well, we had an epidemic hit our staff this week, and unfortunately it has put us a bit behind. However, we are quickly getting back on track, and maybe, considering the circumstances, you could cut us a little slack. Give us a bit of an extension. I know, but we've never asked for it before and we will never ask for it again! By the way, you sound like a very handsome man, Russell. Do you work out? Yes, I'm using my wiles, and everything else I can to get you to - one hour. I'll take it. Thank you, Russell. You have a slightly inappropriate Christmas card coming your way this year." She hangs up and goes over to Bill who is playing with his yo-yo. Rory grabs a pair of scissors and cuts the string. "I was cat's cradling!" He complains. Rory looks at Bill annoyed at his lack of work. "Bill, get your ass out of that chair and work! Or get your ass out of that chair and leave. Either way get your ass out of that chair!" She demands. Bill tells her that he does not want to help Paris and she tells him that he would not be helping Paris, he would be helping her. "Fine. But if Punxsutawney Phil sticks her head out of her hole, I am out of here." Bill says giving in.
Logan comes in and Rory starts to tell her she's sorry about not be able to go on their date. "Paris melted down and everyone quit and the paper wasn't going to come out, and I only found out about it because no one called me to confirm they got my story, so I called in all the heelers, and I got Sheila and Joni to come in, and I called Pete who said he was sick, but I threatened his job so he came in, but he was really sick so I had to send him home so he didn't get everyone else sick. Plus, the printers are trying to give our time away, the computers keep crashing and then there's the tiny little detail of nothing's done and D-day the paper came out, and I forgot. I'm sorry." She explains. Logan looks at her and smiles. "I can't believe you didn't call me!" Rory looks at him puzzled. "I know, but it's just paper stuff. You hate it here." Logan tells her that doesn't matter. " I know this crap backwards and forwards. I can't believe you didn't think to call me." Rory tells him she's sorry again and Logan tells her that he has some stories he never gave Paris. "And just remember, if you still need material, just cannibalize everything you have ready for Friday's issue and use it for tonight." He tells her. "Robbing Peter to pay Paul." Rory says. "Peter's asking for it." Logan replies. Rory informs Logan that Bill is doing desking. "I'd throw Sheila on there with him. It'll hurt his ego and make him work faster. Okay, I'll be over here if you need me, and get that yo-yo off the floor! Somebody's going to break their neck!" Logan commands. Bill picks up the yo-yo and Rory smiles.
Back at Lorelai's, Luke is talking about April "I mean, can you believe she reads? I have a kid who reads. Crazy! She sat there for hours doing her homework. Geometry! That's some crazy stuff. I actually bought a book, Geometry for Dummies. I stashed it in the kitchen and run back there every time she asked a question, thinking I could keep up with her. But I can't figure out what the hell it says! I mean, it's just this mess of weird symbols and shapes - I wonder if there's another book I could get." Lorelai tries to help. "Um, Geometry for Dummies for Dummies?" She says. "Yes, excatly." Luke replies. "Do you know, tonight, she comes to the diner, she's sitting at the counter doing her homework, there. I look over at the Soda Shoppe, and the whole damn town is staring through the window at us!" Lorelai plays pretend and says she didn't know and asks what happened. "Nothing." Luke tells her. "She didn't notice anything. She was too busy studying! I just couldn't believe those people. I mean, can't they get that this is a private thing? I'm trying to get to know my kid. I mean, you understand. You're not all over me about this. You get that we need some alone time." Lorelai tells him she gets it and they kiss.
At the news room, the end of the hour starts to occur. Everyone is all gathered around Rory as she cuts and pastes the final story into the layout when the phone rings. It's Russell, giving away their spot. Rory is starting to freak out, but Logan shoves Bill aside and takes the call. He tells Russell that he is Logan Huntzberger and it is clear that Russell is listening. Logan lies and claims that they have already sent in the issue. Rory's still trying to finish it and signals for him to stretch. Logan asks for Russell's name and how to spell it, rattling on that he's looking for a pen and when he finds out that Russell's last name is Smith, Rory signals that the issue is sent over. The staff cheers in celebration and Paris walks out of her bunker. "All right!" she says. We got the paper out! That's what I'm talking about, people, good hustle! Really good hustle! And they said we couldn't do it! Huh? Boy, what a rush! Right?" Everyone rolls their eyes and she walks back into her bunker. Rory turns to Logan."So, I'm just saying that when that giant asteroid heads toward Earth, I want you in that fighter jet! You saved my ass." Rory tells Logan. "Infinitely worth saving." He tells her. She kisses him and tells him that she is sorry that they didn't get their dinner, Logan pulls out a brown bag with candles, wine and sandwiches. Rory laughs.
Friday night, Lorelai and Rory are standing in front of Emily and Richard's house. Lorelai tells a story. "Once upon a time there was a big house, with thick glass windows and heavy stone walls and a slightly pornographic fountain in the driveway. And all the animals in the forest were scared of the house 'cause they thought that the house was haunted! And so did all the villagers in the small hamlet of Hartfordshire…ville. 'Maids go in but they never come out!' they would whisper on the street.One day a beautiful young cowherderess walked by the house." Rory interupts and asks why a cowherderess. Lorelai tells her they could just go in. "Cowherderess is walking by." Rory says wanting to keep the story going. Lorelai keeps the story going but gives up in the middle." Seriously, this didn't work when you were four. I am not sure why you thought it would do any good now." She tells Rory and Rory rings the doorbell.
A maid answers the door and Lorelai and Rory walk in. They go into the living room, get their drinks, and have an awkward conversation with Richard until Emily comes in from the patio saying she'll be in later after she finishes up a moonscape she's painting for the DAR art show. The awkwardness continues as Richard barely lets them sip of their martinis before interrupting them to make more. Rory is upset that her grandparents hate her, and Lorelai asks Richard if something is wrong. Richard neither confirms or denies this, and Lorelai demands that Emily come inside so that they can all talk about the Christopher-paying-for-Yale thing. The Grandparents aggressively say that all of this talking is unnecessary, but when Rory tries to explain, saying that she let Chris pay for school because he is her father, they both burst out laughing. "Perhaps your father can reimburse me," Richard says, "for the five cases of Scotch I had to send to the man in the bursar's office." Rory says he would be happy to do that. Emily says Rory just wanted to hurt them. Hurt by this, Rory gets up and tries to leave. Emily, Richard and Rory start to walk off in different directions. "Hey!" Lorelai yells and everyone stops walking. "This is not going to happen. You're not going back to your moonscape, you're not going back to work and you're not going home! Now, we all agreed to have Friday night dinner, and we're here and I smell dinner. And, yes, apparently there are some issues to be worked out, but no one, and I mean no one is leaving here until we do!"
At the dinner table, the camera circles around. Rory says that things were "out of control" between her and her grandparents. Emily says that that was not the point, and lists the many things they did for her when she was going through her post-boat-stealing phase. Rory says that she didn't ask for any of those things, and Emily points out that she never stopped them from doing any of them. Richard adds that Rory then moved out of the house without telling them. "I never realized how spoiled you were, Rory. But I guess that's to be expected. Only children are always spoiled." Rory says she's sorry she didn't leave a note, and that there's nothing she can do to make them believe she's sorry. "She was emotional. When you're emotional you don't think clearly. I remember a woman who tried to buy a plane when her granddaughter moved out!" Lorelai says. The maid comes in with the salad and Lorelai has never been so happy to see salad in her life.
Still at the dinner table, Lorelai is furious that her parents betrayed her when she asked for help after Rory got slammed by the Huntzbergers, setting her off on a life of crime that ended with her dropping out of school. Emily says that if they'd known the extent of the issue, they would have been able to help. "I tried to tell you! "I came here and I told you exactly what happened with Mitchum and you didn't want to hear it." Lorelai screams and can not believe that her parents are denying that they knew about all this.She reenacts the enitre scene between Richard, Emily, and her. "The Huntzbergers told her she wasn't good enough and Mitchum told her she didn't have it!" Mimicking Richard, "He what?" As herself, "Yes! And now she's dropped out of Yale but between the three of us we can knock some sense into her!" Mimicking Emily, "Of course we'll help you! This is not happening!" Mimicking Richard again, "I'll call Charlie Davenport tomorrow!" As herself, "Thank you, guys, so much! Just thank you! And scene!" Lorelai slams her hands on the table, exasperated.
At dessert they all think that the sorbet is delicious.
Rory and Lorelai are at the table drinking coffee while Richard and Emily fight in the background. "What are you thinking, buying an airplane?" Richard demands. "I didn't buy it! I looked at it! I can look at a plane if I want to look at a plane!" Emily shrieks.
In The living room, everyone laughs as Emily and Richard tells their story. "So I lead her over to the good tables, smiling like we're the best friends in the world, and I tell her, 'Shira, you don't think Rory is good enough to be in your family? She is. We are just as good as you are. After all, you are nothing but a two-bit gold digger and how you managed to bag Mitchum I will never know!’ I told her Mitchum still plays around!" Emily says smiling. "Mom!" Lorelai says gasping in shock. Richard turns to Emily, "Tell her exactly what you said. About her weight." Richard waves his hand up and down. "Oh, yes, yes, I got it! I told her, 'Mitchum still plays around you know. Well, of course you know, that's why your weight goes up and down thirty pounds every three months! I only wished I'd remembered to call her a cocktail waitress!" Emily laughs. "Ooh, woo, that's my mother's version of the C-word!" Lorelai screams and everyone laughs.
Rory and Emily walk around the house fighting about the DAR. "I don't want to quit the DAR! I was accepted and certified, Grandma, you can't just kick me out!" Rory tells her. "I can too." Emily says. "I know the rules backwards and forward and I have done nothing to lose my status except argue with you! Plus, I'm in contact with more members than you are! And I like more of the members than you do." Rory informs her. "That is not true!" Emily yells. "I talk to Tweeny Halpurn all the time!" Rory yells back. "What are you doing talking to Tweeny Halpurn?" Emily demands. "I'm friends with Tweeny Halpurn! I'm helping her daughter look at colleges! I'm going to give her a tour of Yale. I'm not quitting!" Rory screams. "Oh, yes, you are!" Emily says. Lorelai and Richard are on the sofa looking very tired. "So, how's Luke?" Richard asks. "He has a kid." Lorelai tells him.
Off screen, Lorelai and Emily scream at each while a very tired Richard and Rory wait it out. "We were sixteen! We didn't want to get married!" Lorelai screams. "When you get pregnant, you get married! A child needs a mother and a father!" Emily screams back at her. " OH. MY GOD!" Lorelai shouts.
Lorelai and Rory leave the house, looking very disheveled.Lorelai turns to Rory and says, "Well, I think we've officially reinstated Friday night dinner." They part and walk to their cars.