Glee Season 1 Episode 21

Santana: Besides creeping us out, why are you telling us this?
Will: If we lose to Vocal Adrenaline at regionals, none of us are gonna regret it. We will have given it our best shot and we won't look back. But we will regret letting them get the best of us before the competition, which is why we need to hit them back just like they hit us.
Quinn: So you want us to T.P their choir room?
Will: Whatever the better, cooler version of that is, like, uh- maybe... maybe we should steal their school statue.
Kurt: Their school statue is a giant, bronze of a great white shark eating a seal pup. It weighs three tons.

Kurt: Rachel's one of us. We're the only ones who get to humiliate her!

Sue: (to Will) You know, for a second, I saw a flash of something. I pictured myself living a normal life. Having someone to come home to every night. And though I completely loathe you, you'd make a great trophy husband. And as you can see by my decor, I love me some trophies.

Sue: Dear Journal, something strange happened yesterday. I felt something below the neck. Dare I admit it? I have feelings for one Will Schuester. Sexy, non-murdering feelings. Oh, it all makes sense now, Journal. True love always springs from true hate. I'll admit it, in the past, I've fantasized about waking up with Will's head on the pillow next to me, except now I picture it attached to the rest of his body.

Kurt: I'm so depressed, I've worn the same outfit twice this week.

Will: Today, I want to talk to you about regrets. Who has some?
Rachel: Giving my heart to Jessie, just to have it crushed like the stage floor at a performance of Stomp.
Quinn: Thinking "Trust me" was a sensible birth control option.