Penny: I mean, I have thought about us a lot. And, yes, I mean, in my fantasies, you're not my boss or in love with Dylan… or such a huge fan of Bachman Turner Overdrive.
Jake: Uh, you're thinking of ELO and they're musically interesting.
Jake: We can't go back to the way things were. I mean, we – we – we can't be friends. We can't be more than friends. We can't not be friends. There's no good option.
Penny: We could be friends who have sex.
Jake: There's one good option.
Jake: Tell me more about these, uh, these friends who have sex.
Penny: Alright, here are the rules. Nothing changes. We don't get all weird. Just every once in a while, I rock your world in a way ELO never could.
Jake: Wow, those are the rules to the best game ever!
Dylan: I came in here last night and I saw Jake and Penny kissing.
Dylan: Well, I - I just sort of assumed that a romance might be starting.
Frank: Wow. Kind of a leap there, don't you think, Dyl? They probably just wanna be friends.
Dylan: How do figure that?
Frank: Because every girl I've ever kissed just wanted to be friends!
Frank: Dylan, do you think Gavin doesn't like me?
Dylan: What? Why?
Frank: 'Cause we've worked together for seven years and in that whole time, the only complete sentence he's ever uttered to me is "keep your chin up and your eyes straight ahead."
Dylan: That sounds kind of inspiring.
Frank: We were at the urinals.
Dylan: Well, I – I saw you guys kiss.
Jake: No you didn't.
Dylan: Yes I did.
(Lenny emerges from the bedroom)
Lenny: Vini Vidi Vicci. I came, I saw, I conquered.
Claire: Fortunately, not in that order!
Claire: You want a drink, Jake?
Jake: Continuously. Until I obliterate the brain cells that contain this memory.
Gavin: Why on earth do you think I would want to be your friend?
Frank: Because we have stuff in common.
Gavin: The only thing we have in common is we're both really looking forward to your retirement!