Florida Evans (1974-1977), (1978-1979)
James Evans (1974-1976)
James "J.J." Evans, Jr.
Thelma Evans Anderson
Eddie: Hey, when do we eat?
Thelma: Pretty soon. I hope you like what we're having for dinner.
James: Hmm, there's no reason he shouldn't. He loves what we have for lunch.
Florida: Well, you know how your father is about studying. He means business.
Thelma: The question is, which beating did he get?
J.J.: Well, as we all know, Dad has three in his repertoire: the regular, the super and (removes hat, looks up toward the ceiling) the Big Mac.
Michael: The Big Mac is right. It can really warm your buns. (rubbing his backside)
James: Who've you been giving your lunches to?
Michael: I can't tell, I'll get a beating.
Florida: Michael, your father's not going to punish you for telling the truth.
Michael: It's not Daddy I'm worried about.
Florida: Michael, have you been eating your lunch every day?
Michael: Yes, Mama.
Florida: All of it? Even the apples?
Florida: (to James) That's odd, I haven't packed an apple in that boy's lunch for two weeks.
Michael: Uh...Excuse me, I have to go to the bathroom.
Florida: It's Michael, the boy has really been hungry lately.
Thelma: He's also been moody lately too, I wonder what's wrong with him.
J.J.: Big appetite, real moody, I know, Michael's pregnant!
James: How come this fridge ain't full, Florida?
Florida: The only way it'll be full will be if we get a smaller refrigerator.
Eddie: Man, nobody's ever spanked me before. James: That's because we just met.
Michael: Momma, do you think Daddy will really hit Eddie?
Florida: Is a bean green?
J.J.: Can James Brown get down?
Thelma: Is your head dead?
Florida: Michael you haven't been eating your lunch all week have you?
Michael: Um no I've been giving it away to a poor kid.
James: To a poor -? Boy we just this side of a care package ourself.
(to Florida regarding J.J.)
James: Do you ever get the feeling like I do sometimes that we might have brought the wrong baby home from the hospital?
J.J.: I wanted to make my favorite sandwich today, Peanut Butter and Jelly. But there wasn't no peanut butter and there wasn't no jelly. So I was forced to make a ghetto jam sandwich. Two pieces of white bread jammed together.
J.J.: How can you cheat at Monopoly?
Thelma: I know I had a hotel on Boardwalk before I went into the bathroom.
J.J.: Well you was in there so long when you came back the hotel was condemned.
Thelma: J.J. you ought to leave your brain to Science, it's never been used.
J.J.: You ought to leave your face to Science they'd come up with a new bride of Frankenstein.
Michael: Come on Eddie this is the third time this week you've taken my lunch. I'm getting sick and tired. If you so hungry why don't you join the free lunch program?
Eddie: I already have Evans and you are it.
Michael: Hey man I get hungry too. What am I supposed to do?
Eddie: Why don't you sign up for the free lunch program?
Eddie: You mean you actually study? You're weird!
Eddie: My mother won't care, I stay out for days at a time, she does too.
J.J.: Nobody wants to pick a fight with the brother of Kid DYNOMITE!
This episode was videotaped on March 06, 1975.
Ja'net DuBois does not appear in this episode.
Douglas Grant is better known as Zach, one of the original members of The Short Circus from The Electric Company.
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