(James explains why he didn't go to the interview)
James: I know what you're thinking, baby. You're thinking I dogged it. Well you're wrong. I just outsmarted that fancy personnel director, that's all. I didn't give him a chance to go into that old put-down routine. You know how it goes, baby: (imitating personnel director "Uh, Mr. Evans, as you know, we're an equal opportunity employer, so your color really isn't important." Meanwhile, the dude is looking me up and down like he's trying to figure out how many watermelons a day I can knock off. Then, the cat asks me, say, "Have you got any van and storage experience?" I mean, can you imagine the nerve of that cat asking me a question like that? Me, the one who moved every stick of furniture in this house in here with my bare hands and on my back!
J.J: That's right, Dad. And you did a great job, too. This house looks professionally vanned and storaged!
James: Damn right! And when I tell him that, does it get through to him? No. Then he says to me, "Uh, Mr. Evans, what is the extent of your educational background?" I say, well I got a sixth grade education. He says, "It doesn't matter." Meanwhile, the cat is writing on his pad like, "No way in the world I'm going to hire this dude." Then he sticks out that four bit manicured hand and says, "Thanks, Mr. Evans. Don't call us, we'll call you." Which is the same as a preacher pronouncing the last rites. Well baby, this is one cat they didn't have a chance to take through them changes, no sir. I fired him before he had a chance to fire me!
(James returns without going to the interview)
Florida: James, what are you doing back so fast?
James: I'm sorry, Florida. I just couldn't stand having another door slammed in my face. I never even went for the interview. [goes for a beer]
J.J: In that case, I got a feeling he ain't gonna get the job!
(debating over who's better, men or women)
J.J.: How about Christopher Columbus, the dude who discovered America?
Florida: Well what about a queen named Elizabeth who gave him the money for the ships?
J.J.: Well how about that dude named Pasteur, who pasteurized milk?
Florida: And how about the dudes that raise the price of milk so we can't afford to drink it?
Thelma: And how about women when they have babies can make their own milk?
(J.J. hesitates, looking at Michael)
J.J.: Michael, don't just sit there, jump in and here and say something!
Michael: In the beginning, God created Adam.
Florida: But when He realized his mistakes, He improved on the model and called her Eve!
This episode was videotaped on August 08, 1974.
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