Goof Troop

Goofy: Gawrsh, when I woke up, the TV crew was gone. Max: That's OK dad, I think we were too good for television anyway. Goofy: I was thinking the same thing, Max, that's why I dug up this here brochure on Hopiandi dancing. Our class starts Monday. You and I can work up a great routine and can take it on the road or something like that there- Max: (Buried his head in a pillow) Aw Sheesh!

Max: See Peej, nothing to it! Hey, where're you going? PJ: I'm going to look for those ping-pong balls and start over.

Person outside: We come in peace; we want to talk to you! Pete: Never, you purple people leaders! Let 'em have it, Jelly Jar! (Peg fired a watermelon and Pistol opened the door) Pistol: Fire!

Pete: Say Pistol pumpkin, how about a nice glass of water for daddy, huh? Pistol: No thanks, I'm not thirsty.

Peg: Wake up, sugar sauce; I think the aliens might have got you. Pete: Can we stay for the cartoons, Mama? Ow.

Goofy: Huh? Gawrsh! What's going on at Pete's house? Max: Oh, they're building a science fiction show, and they want you in it! Goofy: Really? Max: Yeah! The talent agents told us about it. PJ: They did? Max: Shh! Now put your helmet on, dad, and I'll fill you in. Goofy: Okey doke!

Scientist #1: What's wrong? Max: Quite simple, eh, he's got the cosmic chicken pox. Scientist #2: Is that dangerous? Max: First your teeth all change position, and then, and then your earwax melts. This is followed by house-itosis, gloated with liver and onions, and male-patterned baldness, and worse of all, it's very contagious. Scientist #2: C-c-c-c-contagious? Everyone bust out, run! Run!

Max (Disguised): Oh no! Professor, did you see that? PJ (Disguised): Gasp! This is terrible! Scientist #1: What is it? Max (Disguised): He says he's, er, er, cutting out of here! Scientist #1: Oh…why would he do that? PJ (Disguised): Er, because he's not feeling well. Scientist #1: Ah…we thought so.

Scientist #1: This looks bad. Max: It is bad, gentlemen. Scientist #1: And just who are you? Max (Disguised): Greetings colleagues, I am Dr. Maximillian and this is Prof. Peechfield. We-we're from the Federated League of ee-er… PJ (Disguised): Intergalactic Body Language. Max (Disguised): Yes, thank you professor. PJ (Disguised): My pleasure. Scientist #1: Wait-er-I've never hear of the-

PJ: Are you sure they got your dad in here? Max: NASA Headquarters, right? Now hop on to your spuds!

PJ: Max! What have we done? Max: (Covers PJ's mouth) Look, there's only one way to corrupt this mess! PJ: Mess up? Max: No, cover up! First, we gotta save dad!

Max: So is that an A+ project or what? PJ: Oh, yeah! I like the part about turning Lincoin's memorial into a video arcade!

Pete: You'll never grill on his earthling barbeque, you cosmic creepos! Helicopter pilot #1: That guy had lost his marbles! Helicopter pilot #2: Fear, probably.

Peg: Er, erm, er, er Peter, are you sure we shouldn't just leave town? Pete: A man's home is his castle, and I'm digging a moat. No galactic ghoul is gonna come along and wreck my royal stuff!

Military Lady: Sirs, we tracked down the alien signal. It's not coming from space; it's being sent here right from Earth! Scientist #1: Aliens have landed in Spoonerville!

Scientist #1: He knows what a typewriter is! (Goofy was smacking his head moving from left to right, and then back left again)

Peg: (To Pistol) Now honey, you have to hurry and pack your things because we have to leave right about… Pete: NO! We stay! Why, I worked hard for this stuff, and no fool and even man is gonna lay a penny on it, see? We're going to fight back!

Max (Acting): We are not joking, earthlings. Observe: This is to be Calamityville (shows a picture of a deserted crater). Ha ha ha ha. And we like Calamityville. You're next! Biff Fuddled: That broadcast was seen moments ago. Now please folks, remember: do not panic. (Panics and screams) Peg & Pistol: Told you so. Pete: M-M-M-M-M-M-Martians?

Pistol: It's true, daddy! Cosmic invaders bent on planetary annihilation out of this very instant. Pete: See? Now you got her doing it! Peg: Oh, shut your yap and open your eyes! (Pulled Pete into the house by the ear)

Pistol: Daddy-daddy, daddy-daddy! Peg: Aliens have invaded Spoonerville! Pete: You interrupted my alliteration for a cheap joke?

Max (Acting): Answer Earthlings, C3-PJ is calculating our attack. We plan to steal all your bases, and your food, and national monument, and-and… PJ (Acting): Corner chambers, and pogo sticks, and toothpaste…

(Goofy was in a blank room and a camera. He saw a camera) Goofy: [Thinking] Gawrsh…I must be in a TV studio! Hey, this might be my big shot at stardom, A-Hyuck! Better practice for my audition. (Act like a chicken) Scientist #1: Amazing! Why, he has the ability to act slyly against invisible gamma rays!

Man: Don't let him get away! Goofy: [Thinking] Now, now folks, come on, I'll still do free shows after I'm famous, A-Hyuck! (People pounced on Goofy) Goofy: [Thinking] Gawrsh! Now I know how Elvis felt!

(Goofy did a mime-in-a-box trick) Scientist #1: Careful, I think he's building a forcefield! Goofy: [Thinking] Gawrsh, must be talent agents! I wondered if they liked my get up.

(Goofy bowed, and the people gasped) Goofy: [Thinking] Shucks! They're already amazed. I haven't even started.

Goofy: [Thinking] Hey, a crowd! (Taps woman's shoulder) Woman: Find your own window! (Looked at Goofy again) Waaaah! (People backed away) Goofy: [Thinking] Oh boy, a campy audience!

Max (Acting): Attention earthlings, we are Tinfoilians from the planet Luminum. PJ (Acting): Yeah, Luminum. Max (Acting): I repeat, we are Tinfoilians from the planet Luminum. That is three zillion light years from your miserable little planet. I am Max-LTDK, and this is… PJ (Acting): Er, C3-PJ. Max (Acting): Our mission? Quite simple. To take over Earth! PJ (Acting): Yeah, and shut down all your schools! Max (Acting): That is right; we demand to speak to your leaders immediately. Scientist #1: Er yes sir; we're getting a signal from somewhere from outer space, sir. Max (Acting): A scout had been sent to communicate our demands. Please communicate or we'll dust ya. Scientist #1: I'm sure he's got a weapon. Well, it looks like some kind of sub-vacuous plutonic extricator, sir. Scientist #1: Panic indeed sir, just hope the public doesn't see this! (People gathered around the TV store watching Max and PJ acting as aliens)

(After wrapping themselves with tinfoil) Max: Wow! Every so often dad actually comes up with a good idea! PJ: I told you he looked like an alien.

PJ: Well, looks like we'll have to build that model after all. Max: No way! Your dad said we couldn't move the VCR, but he didn't say we couldn't plug into it. PJ: (Looks at screen) Huh?

Pete: Stop, time out, hold it right there! PJ: Oh dad! I need er…to borrow your VCR for my science project. Pete: And what happened to the ping pong balls I gave you? PJ: We're ma-ma-ma-making a science fiction video instead. Pete: Well, forget it! PJ: But why dad? I mean… Pete: You see, son, a man's home is his castle, so that makes me king; king of the house, the boat, the barbeque, the bowling trophies and especially the VCR. So that royal stuff is off-limits to peasants, like yourself, you understand!? PJ: Er…sort of? Pete: Good! Put it back.

(The coffee eroded the mug and fell on the ground, in which it emitted lava and fizzles) Pete: Yuck! (The mug broke into pieces) Pete: Hmm, maybe I could use it for charcoal lighter.

Peg: Oh, here, try this. (Hands Pete a mug of coffee) Pete: (Drinks it and had strange reactions, and spits some coffee out) Peg: Like it? Pete: Yeah (spits), what is this stuff? Peg: Tasmanian Tar Roast Coffee. It's on sale so I bought 50 pounds!

Max: (Searched through his closet) I found it! (Took a camcorder) Nuts, I forgot this needs a VCR, and ours are broken. PJ: Well, that's that. Max: I know! We'll use your dad's! PJ: Hey man, we touched dad's stuff. Boom! He will plaster us.

PJ: What about costumes, Max? I mean, we can't invade the earth with blue jeans. Max: I'll think of something, I always do. Goofy: (Came into room covered with a tinfoil costume) Ta-da! What do you think? Max: (To PJ) Dad's taking a pantomime class. PJ: What's he wearing? Goofy: Tinfoil! Dance like a harp, guess what I am?

Artist Teacher: Congratulations, Mr. Goof, you have just passed the after-humanity school street the author. Goofy: Really? Gawrsh! Wait till I tell Max! Artist Teacher: Now, get yourself a flashy costume, and you wear it, and bedazzle them! Goofy: Dazzle, yes sir! Artist Teacher: (Squeals) Don't ever speak while performing! Goofy: Nuh-uh.

Artist Teacher: (Shows Goofy a flash card of Donald Duck) Duck! Goofy: (Ducks) Artist Teacher: Oooh, interesting!

Artist Teacher: Oh, come come come, Goof, you must push yourself, think creative, visual! Goofy: Okie doke. Artist Teacher: Shh! No no no no, remember, remember, meems (mimes) do not talk.

PJ: Hey, wait a minute; don't movies take a lot of time, and work? Max: Trust me, space cadet.

Max: You need something now, and wow. A video! PJ: Wow, just like in the movies!

Max: Look bro, if you wanna ace this project, you need something sassier than a coat hanger. PJ: Oo, like what? Max: Think creative, visual, comets! Think comets, quasars, novas, supernovas, yummy novas! PJ: Hey, yeah!

(Ping pong ball fell out from the model solar system again) Max: Puh-lease! Just looking at it makes my eyes yawn. PJ: Come on, it's not that bad, really! (The other ping pong balls fell out from the model solar system) Max: Yes it is, really!

PJ: Earth, Venus, Pluto, Mars. Round and round the sun and stars! (Red ping pong ball fell out of the model solar system) Max: Mars fall out of orbit. Take eleven.