Gossip Girl

Season 3 Episode 9

They Shoot Humphreys, Don't They?

Aired Monday 9:00 PM Nov 09, 2009 on The CW
out of 10
User Rating
250 votes

By TV.com Users

Episode Summary

Jenny wants to be the Queen Bee of not only Constance but of all the Upper East Side, as she lands the hottest escort for the Cotillion. Meanwhile Dan and Vanessa try to convince Olivia to stay in NY by showing her the "true college experience". Leighton Meester's new single "Somebody to Love" is featured in the episode, along with performance from Plastiscines.moreless

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  • Talk about hilarious!

    Even through the melodrama of Olivia's movie dilemma, Blair's fallout with Serena and Jenny's midlife crisis, I really couldn't help myself.

    I would give Gossip Girl one thing, they surely made Jenny into a B**** and if they could shoot Humphreys I'm sure she would be the first target.

    Whew, there was a lot of battling going on and a bit of madness everywhere. The main event this time was the Debutante Ball and it was Jenny's goal to score a date before the night was up or she would have surely turned into the Brooklyn pumpkin she dreaded.

    Each character from season one has their imitator; Jenny is supposedly playing the old Blair Waldorf, the new clingy girl is the old Jenny and Graham Collins - the old Nate Archibald. While these moments bring back fond memories, I would have preferred if things remained the way they were and for Jenny to be in something more original. While Jenny keeps prancing around in shorts, all blacks and goes backstabbing her brother, I can't understand how Rufus could stand back and be proud of his grown daughter without any resentment towards the person she is becoming. Maybe he could be busy with post-nuptial arrangements, but I remembered the time he freaked when Jenny once went nuts and stubborn. Now Jenny is willing to kill her principles and chill with no-brainers all for what? Popularity? If she thought having Nate as an escort did the trick to score some points, I ask myself, what is a guy like Nate Archibald still hanging around a group of high schoolers, doesn't he have his college frat boys to hang wit'.

    That also goes for Blair, Chuck and all the other people that seemed completely out of place here. I understand why Lily would want to host the Ball another time around, her credibility stands, but I really cannot appreciate the moments she has with Rufus anymore. They've settled down and the writers have done nothing to rekindle that flame I once admired.

    The Threesome theme was reflected in every promotion and it also placed an odd thought as to what three was it going to be. What a huge let down it was to see Olivia-Dan and Vanessa flaunt it all over town then head back to Dan's place to get-it-on. Didn't Vanessa feel like the third wheel at any point, enough for her to decide it was too hot for her to bathe in the shower with her Best friend and his girlfriend. Vanessa seemed to be the one drinking the most and they were pretty hammered, but even before the partying and the heading back to Dan's place, didn't Vanessa see where that article was going to lead?

    I expect a little level of credibility from Gossip Girl, that's all. So Yeah, I want Nate to get a life (I would have preferred if he kicked Jenny to the curb and teach her a lesson, what happened to her not being the same person). Rufus needs to see some change in his little girl and Dan, well I don't know, it really seems like Olivia has done him more harm than good. Doesn't Olivia have her own goodie-time place, like a loft or a mansion of some sort, why is she always by Dan's?

    Unfortunately, there weren't much Highlights this round worth pointing out. I found myself humored by the attempt to recreate something that was once good, but that can't be done so the writers need to focus on what is already there. Sadly this episode turned out to be the exact quality I expected.

    Lexa Reviews



    Two Stars

    Grade D-

  • Season 1-ish GG is BACK!!!

    OMG this was the BEST gossip girl since Season 1!!!

    This is a must-watch for anyone who stopped watching the show.

    * The 3-Some was hmm...they didn't really show it but next week we'll see how hot it really was. (If it was?) When Olivia kissed Vanessa I watched in amazement. Didnt see that coming from Hilary Duff. :O

    * The party was so gossip girl which was GOOD. Fancy party, clothes and people...makes this show hot.

    * Jenny - she's a mean b*tch now and it's fitting her and the show so well.

    * An evil Eric - even more interesting. Up til now he's really just been a whole nothing. Let the writers explore more of his evil side.

    * Serena & Blair - finally. I miss seeing them act like bff's which they haven't done this season.

    And Leighton's single in the party scene fit well. Loved it.

    10 out of 10. BRING on next week!moreless
  • Dan Olivia and Vanessa act like whores and the others are as always OVER DRAMATIC...

    This episode was a huge let down, i dont even know if i will ever look at Dan or Vanessa.

    it is stuff like this that supposedly us gays do and is why we cant have a ligitimate relationship or marriage.

    and why is it girls always can make out be lesbian bisexual whatever but the only gays in the show act like enucs who cant even kiss on screen.

    i find this show to be typical now like all other American TV shows and it lacks in any tact. im no longer a fan!

    this show is also insulting of lesbians and if i was a lesbian i would feel insulted being treated like a toy to mens pleasures like being lesbian is something you can turn on and off in front of cute boys. they make a joke of gays and lesbians in every possible way its gross!moreless
  • 309

    Now I know why I stopped watching this show. It lost all the elements that made it what it was. Chuck Bass as a nice guy, helping people carve out their differences? Blair only scheming for a portion of the episode?

    But perhaps the biggest atrocity was Jenny. Taylor Momsen is just a poor actress and the fact that this episode was nearly entirely devoted to her just exposed her inadequacies. Leighton Meester was great, even Blake Lively was passable, but Momsen just cannot cut it.

    And I feel like I have to comment on the three way. The much hyped and criticized event was as brief as could be. You would think Hilary Duff and Jessica Szohr kissing would be enough to get the male 18-49 ratings at an all-time high, but as someone in that group I was surely disappointed.moreless
  • Good episode

    This was a good episode but it wasnt great.

    The threesome was talked about for weeks in advance and was even considered being not shown on tv and then all we saw were them kissing each other once? I dont see what the big deal was and all the hype was about.

    Loved chuck and nate scheming together to get blair and serena to be friends again. the locking them in the elevatr together was great, and "if you too want to kiss i wont consider it cheating"..such a good chuck line :)

    jenny was just being a complete cow and deserved everything that eric did to her and more.moreless
Matt Doyle

Matt Doyle

Jonathan Henry

Guest Star

Sarah Steele

Sarah Steele

Kira Abernathy

Guest Star

Aaron Tveit

Aaron Tveit

Trip Van der Bilt

Guest Star

Hilary Duff

Hilary Duff

Olivia Burke

Recurring Role

Connor Paolo

Connor Paolo

Eric van der Woodsen

Recurring Role

Chanel Farrell

Chanel Farrell

Sawyer Bennett

Recurring Role

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


  • TRIVIA (1)

    • The place of the first rehearsal for the Cotillion is the Cedar Lake Contemporary Ballet, a company based at 547 West 26th Street in New York City. The company was named one of Dance Magazine's "25 to Watch" in 2008.

  • QUOTES (11)

    • Blair: I have a surprise for you!
      Chuck: Then why are you still dressed?

    • Blair: Is that pole artist wearing my agent provocateur corset? Just tell her to be careful undoing the eye hooks, they pinch. I just came to get a dress for tonight. (Walks into another room)
      Chuck: The last time I saw Blair that freakishly calm...
      Nate: Was when Serena left for boarding school.
      Chuck: And you know as well I do that the calm won't last. And when it breaks, there will be pieces of Blair all over the wall.

    • Blair: You were the one who said to restrict out scheming to outsiders!
      Chuck: Desperate times, desperate measures. And I am willing to accept my punishment. In fact, I left a few crops up in the lounge.
      Blair: Sadly, your punishment is going to be an evening without me. I'm going to spend it with my best friend. Oh, and if you ever loan out my lingerie again, well, (Kisses him) I just hope you like me in flannel.

    • Serena: Let's find Chuck and Nate and thank them.
      Blair: And then torture them.

    • Blair: Hello, I'm trapped in the elevator with someone who sucks all the air out of the room. Send help within the hour.
      Chuck: (Over intercom) Not until you two work things out.
      Blair: Bass? This is a punishable offense. And not the kind of punishment you like!
      Chuck: I'm only doing what you refused to do yourself.
      Serena: Chuck this isn't funny.
      Chuck: There's a malt and some maccaroons in the storage vault. Plenty to sustain you until you two figure things out.
      Blair: So... what did my text supposedly say?
      Serena: That you were sorry and you missed me.
      Blair: You text me back?

    • Blair: Carter was one thing, but Trip is a married congressman.
      Serena: I know.
      Blair: Serena, promise you won't see him or speak to him again without coming to me first.
      Serena: Okay. I promise. Thank you, Blair.
      Chuck: (Over intercom) If you two want to kiss, it won't count as cheating.
      Serena: Creepy, Chuck.

    • Nate: (About Blair and Serena) What are they fighting about this time?
      Chuck: Basically each one loves the other more than the other loves her.
      Nate: Can you even fight about that?

    • Gossip Girl: Nobody puts Jenny Humphrey in the corner.

    • Gossip Girl: Looks like things could get ugly in the morning. XOXO, Gossip Girl

    • Blair: You went looking for your father?
      Serena: Yeah. And I found him too, but he didn't want to see me.
      Blair: What? Why didn't you say anything while all this was happening?
      Serena: I guess I was ashamed. Your dad adores you. All your dads do. And Rufus would do anything for Dan and Jenny. Even Nate. He may have to go to prison to see his dad, but The Captain would never turn him away. I'm even jealous of Nate's dad.
      Blair: Not knowing you is your father's loss.
      Serena: Maybe, but I just can't seem to let it go. I keep leaving messages and writing letters to addresses I'm not even sure are his.
      Blair: You miss him. You're allowed.
      Serena: I don't want to. All I even remember of him is going on trips and coming back and bringing me presents. And then one time he didn't come back.

    • Blair: I used to have a friend like Jenny. She was beautiful, fabulous, and she let me make sacrifices for her. And you know what I got on that investment? Zero, because girls like her run emotional posse schemes. Serena will never like you the way you like her.
      Kiera: You mean Jenny?
      Blair: (pauses) Details!

  • NOTES (4)

    • International Episode Titles:
      Czech Republic: Prokletí jménem Humphrey (Curse of the Name Humphrey)

    • Featured Music:
      "B.i.t.c.h" by Plastiscines
      "Morning After Dark" by Timbaland featuting Soshy (in the episode's promo)
      "I Am Down" by Plastiscines
      "Questions & Panthers" by One for the Team
      "Saga" by Basement Jaxx featuring Santigold
      "Somebody to Love" by Leighton Meester featuting Robin Thicke
      "Whatever You Like" by Anya Marina
      "Bows & Arrows" by Immoor
      "Underneath My Skin" by Stella Project
      "Ready to Freak" by Stella Project
      "Play to Win" by Classic

    • Original International Airdates:
      United Kingdom: December 2, 2009 on ITV2
      Sweden: December 13, 2009 on Kanal 5
      Latin America: January 10, 2009 on Warner Channel
      Australia: January 19, 2010 on Fox8
      Norway: March 1, 2010 on FEM
      Turkey: April 13, 2010 on CNBC-e
      Slovakia: August 15, 2010 on Doma
      Czech Republic: October 30, 2011 on Prima LOVE

    • When Jenny is looking for an escort for the Cotillion, she is handed a mobile which displays the Facebook profile of Colby Shrefler. In 2007 and 2008 he was a location assistant in 15 episodes of the show.


    • Olivia: This is even more amazing than dancing in the fountain.

      Hilary Duff and her sister Haylie were dancing in a fountain for their music video "Our Lips Are Sealed".

    • Eric: She is not Darth Vader yet, she can still stay Anakin. We have to stop her before we truly loose her to the dark side.

      This is a reference to the Star Wars Saga and especially to Anakin Skywalker and his rise and fall from a Jedi to the dark side. In the prequel films, Anakin is a Jedi Knight, later he is the alter ego of Sith Lord Darth Vader as well as the father of Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia Organa.

    • Gossip Girl: Just like the mob, New York Prep Schools have their own five families. You may be the John Gotti of Constance, Little J, but that doesn't mean you'll ever be part of this cosa nostra.

      This is a reference to John Joseph Gotti, boss of the Gambino family after the murder of the previous boss Paul Castellano. He was the most powerful crime boss during his era and became widely known for his outspoken personality. In 1992 Gotti was sentenced to life in prison where he died 10 years later of cancer.

    • Title: They Shoot Humphreys, Don't They?

      This is an allusion to the 1969 drama film They Shoot Horses, Don't They? directed by Sydney Pollack. The screenplay by James Poe and Robert E. Thompson is based on the 1935 novel of the same name by Horace McCoy.