Grey's Anatomy

Season 5 Episode 10

All By Myself

Aired Thursday 8:00 PM Dec 04, 2008 on ABC



  • Trivia

    • Goof: During the scene where Cristina choose Alex for the solo surgery, she writes "Karev, A" on the OR board in the middle of the box. But later on in the scene when Meredith walks up next to Derek, the board says only "Karev" and it is higher up in the box.

  • Quotes

    • Meredith: Hey, you paged?
      Alex: I need you to scrub in.
      Meredith: Where's Izzie?
      Alex: I'm freakin' out. I told her that I love her. I told her that I love her before a solo surgery. I can't believe that. Who does that? And now she's not gonna show up and I'm freakin' out.
      Meredith: Stop freaking out. If you screw this up, and kill this guy, I'm gonna be pissed. Then I'll know I should've won it. You have to kick ass in there, Alex. You have no choice.
      Richard (walks in): Big night in there, you ready Karev? ... You ready?
      Izzie (walks in): He's ready.

    • Meredith: We're fighting and I don't want to be. Let's just put this past us. What happened with the Chief, and the interns, it doesn't matter. I know that's why you didn't choose me, and I know that's why you made it personal, so... let's just move on.
      Cristina: You made it personal. This right here is you making it personal. You told me to do what I had to do. So, I choose Alex, he was the most prepared. That's why I didn't choose you. Not because we're fighting, but because unlike you, I can seperate my personal life from my job. You made it personal. (stands up, angry) ... None of you said anything. Those were all of our interns. But I won this, they picked me! ... If I don't deserve this solo surgery, then none of us do.

    • Meredith: So you were right, Cristina and I are fighting.
      Derek: You should go, talk to her. She's your best friend. It's important.
      Meredith: Derek...
      Derek: They don't tell you when you become a doctor it's gonna be like this. They don't tell you that you lose more patients than you save. 16... I'm sick of the death.
      Meredith: I'm sorry.

    • Alex: Izz... I won!
      Izzie: Hey. What time is it?
      Alex: Yang. She picked me for the solo surgery.
      Izzie: She did? That's amazing.
      Alex: I love you!
      Izzie: What?
      Alex: I love you! I frickin' love you. I just got the solo surgery and the first thing I did was look for you. And you weren't there. You're never there anymore. And I was thinking about it and I think it might be because you love me too. And because you're scared of that. And because I... I screwed it up last time, and because... Denny died, and-
      Izzie: Alex...
      Alex: Look, just listen. You had that heart patient and it reminded you of Denny and how bad you felt when you were lying on that bathroom floor. I get that! I get that you're scared. But you're not going to have to feel like that again. Because I'm not going to die, Izz. And I'm not gonna cheat on you, and I'm not gonna go anywhere! 'Cause, I think you're my best shot at... I think that with you... you make me better. You make me wanna be better. You make me want to be good. And I think I can. With you. I think I can. So I'm not going anywhere, and you can stop hiding. And if you wanna be scared that's okay just be scared with me. Be scared while you scrub in with me on my first solo surgery. Okay?
      Izzie: You love me.
      Alex: Shut up. (kisses her then leaves) Solo surgery.
      Denny (to Izzie): I'm really starting to not like that guy.

    • Sadie: It was my fault.
      Richard: Excuse me?
      Sadie: What happened... The appy. It was my fault. I knew what I was doing, so if you wanna punish someone, punish me not Dr. Yang.
      Richard: You know who your father is, and you know he's the reason that you're still here. So, if I were you I'd stop worryin' who's fault the appy was and start figuring out what I was gonna do to make up for it.
      Sadie: Yes, sir. Thank you, sir.

    • Izzie: Have you ever had mind blowing sex? The kind of sex that makes you wanna die? Just... fall on the floor and give up and die. Because this sex I'm having, it's that good. It's the best sex I've ever had. In fact, it's the best sex that anybody's ever had. I don't know why anybody who's had this kinda sex would do anything but have sex.
      Cristina: Izzie...
      Izzie: You're gonna give the solo surgery to Mer, which is typical and boring but... slightly corrupt. But at least I'm having really, really good sex. Yeah, I just thought you should know.

    • Sadie: I'm not sorry, you know.
      Lexie: What?
      Sadie: For what we did. It was extreme, maybe even stupid. But this program... I mean, you should be down in that OR, not up here in the nosebleeds. And I shouldn't be spending my entire day transcribing all of Karev's charts because his handwriting is illegible. I mean, how's that teaching? So they can call me crazy Sadie and God knows what other names. But that doesn't change the fact that it's broken. I mean, the only time that they ever bother with us is when they think they can get us in bed.
      Lexie: That's not true. Dr. Sloan took the time to teach me today and that wasn't about sex.
      Sadie: He likes you.
      Lexie: Who? Dr. Sloan?
      Sadie: Oh, don't tell me you haven't noticed his eyes on your ass.
      Lexie: You are delusional.

    • Alex: I hope you didn't paged me to help you hand out cough drops, it ain't gonna happen.
      George: Where's Izzie?
      Alex: How should I know? I thought that she was here.
      George: She's avoiding me. She won't answer my pages.
      Alex: So what do you want me to do about it?
      George: Well, you guys are together now, right? So, why don't you talk to her and find out why she couldn't careless about her own clinic?
      Alex: Look, you're just pissed that she's not here because you can't handle a few cases of the flu.
      George: Something's wrong, Alex. You need to talk to her. She won't talk to me.
      Alex: Don't ever talk to me about Izzie again.

    • Owen: Know who you're gonna pick?
      Cristina: Well, I'm ranking them, according to a system. You know, surgical skills, hours in the O.R., published papers, academic accomplishments ...
      Owen: You know them, you know their capabilities. Go with your gut.
      Cristina: My gut? I'm not putting a patient's life in the hands of a novice surgeon based on my gut.
      Owen: Well, it worked for me.
      Cristina: I bet.
      Owen: It's what told me to choose you.

    • Lexie: So this valve flips open, so we can--
      Mark: You're in my space. Back up! Just back the hell up. Dr. Bailey, will you please find Dr. Grey something to do other than interfere.
      Bailey: Uh, Dr. Grey finish preppin' Mrs. Patterson for surgery. (she glares at Mark)
      Mark: What? She was in my space.

    • Meredith: Hey, so you know, I deserve this. You know I'm the most qualified. But I don't want it to be a big akward thing, I don't so... Just you know, you do what you have to do.
      Cristina: Okay.
      Meredith: Okay. I'll see you later.

    • George: So did you forget to open it or did you forget to staff it?
      Izzie: Both. I'm sorry everyone, I will be right back with the key. (starts walking away)
      George: You might as well get some nurses while you're at it.
      Denny: So does this happen all the time? Because if it does, you're kind of giving my clinic a bad name.
      Izzie: You're mocking me? Sweet. Very sweet.

    • George: I know that you still see me as 007. But that was day one, I've grown a lot since then and learned a lot. You know, anyone can have brains, or anyone can have talent. But the key is to grow, so sure, I had a rough start. And I had to re-do some of my intern year, but I came out the other said... smarter. Better. the important point is that I never gave up, because I'm a fighter.
      Cristina: ... Thank you.

    • Sadie: Tell me everything that there is to know about Karev.
      Meredith: Why?
      Sadie: Because I'm his intern. He seems cool enough at your house though, whatever he's got goin' on with the girl who masturbates all the time... I don't like to judge but, still officially I'm his intern. So, what's his deal?
      Meredith: Sadie, I can't be your friend in here. I mean, I'm a resident and you're an intern. You're gonna have to figure it out how not to piss off Alex Karev yourself.

    • Cristina: What are you doing here? This is cardio wing. Only cardio Gods aloud.
      Owen: I know. I was just lookin' around, getting to know other parts of the hospital.
      Cristina: What else is there? The OR, the ER, and the place with the food.
      Owen: Someone's got a lot to learn.

    • Lexie: Hey. (Mark nods) I get it. I'm the one who organized a crazy cabal of secret cutter interns. The thing is, I've been advised to seek out sex as a way out of my sad predicament, but I think I would rather just learn today, so... what do you say? You, me ...
      Mark: Why are you talking about sex to me? It's inappropriate. I'm your teacher. I have things to teach. Double board-certified things.
      Lexie: That's what I was talking about. For- For you to teach me ... medicine. The sex, that was... a joke.
      Bailey (walks up): Dr. Sloan, I heard that you're performing a hypothorax reconstruction today.
      Mark: To make a woman speak again.
      Bailey: Oh, well, let's hope. I read up on the surgery and...
      Mark: You read up on my surgery?
      Bailey: Since it's your first time performing what I understand to be a very cutting-edge surgery, I was hoping you could use another set of hands.
      Mark: Fine. You can join Dr. Grey and me.
      Bailey: Dr. Grey, who's been banned from the OR?
      Mark: She's on cappuccino duty. Which Dr. Grey, I'm still waiting for.
      Lexie: Right away. Thank you.

    • Lexie: Cristina still hasn't even talked to me, which is normal. Except... it's worse. Two week suspension and she hasn't even bothered to say one mean thing.
      Graziella: Karev called me a moron. ... Which is good.
      Sadie: None of the residents will even look at me.
      Lexie: The least they could do is hate us.
      Ryan: Well, I'm gonna get some sex. Sex always makes me feel better.
      Graziella: Don't look at me.
      Lexie: Me neither.
      Sadie: That makes three of us.

    • George (handing her a coffee): I operated on a heart in an elevator.
      Alex: Look, that was over a year ago. O'Malley's 007. Think how poor your decision would look if you gave it to him.
      Izzie: I don't ever know why you guys are bothering. We all know who she's gonna pick.
      Meredith: She's not gonna pick me because I'm her best friend. She's gonna pick me because I'm the best.
      Cristina: Okay. Stop! Are you guys kidding me? ... Fine. I'll think about it. Just go and do surgical things.

    • Richard: Choosing the first solo surgery isn't just about who has the best surgical skills. Or who's logged the most hours in the OR. It's about the highest form of trust. The trust to put a patient's life into one of our residents' hands. And for the first time I can recall, every single attending picked the same person. Dr. Yang. However, Dr. Yang is out of the running. She is going to pick the winner instead. Dr. Yang will post her decision on the O.R. board at 4 p.m. Also, since your interns are still banned from the O.R., the winner will be allowed to pick a fellow resident to scrub in with them. Good luck. (they all walk off)
      Cristina: This is torture for me.
      Richard: I'm not even done.
      Cristina: Sir?
      Richard: Dr. Dixon's back. You'll be spending the day with her. You will impress her. And you will make sure this hospital impresses her. By the end of the day, I want that woman to be my next head of cardio. If she's not, I will know who to blame. Good luck.

    • Alex: Come on, which one is it Stevens or Karev?
      Cristina: This is stupid. You guys are gonna trust these imbasals to tell you who's getting the solo surgery?
      Izzie: Is this hard for you? Being banned from the solo surgery, it must be really hard for you.
      Meredith: He can change his mind. He's been known to change his mind.
      Cristina: Please don't do that. You guys go ahead and will yourselves to be voted in. Use the sercet.
      Steve (runs in): Grey! The Chief said Grey.
      George: What?
      Alex: Come on. This is bogus.
      Bailey: You just figurin' that out? Steve is not a lip reader. None of the interns are lip readers. You'll just have to wait for the attendings to vote. Just like we did when I won.
      Cristina: You won your solo surgery?
      Bailey: I'm gonna pretend you didn't feel the need to ask me that question Yang, of course I won. I was good. Didn't cut LVAD wires, put my hands on bombs in body cavities, or have my interns operating on themselves. I was special! I was young, gifted and black, and everybody knew it. Attendings knew it, Chief knew it. I didn't have to act like I could read lips. I'd just go about my work, calmly, waiting for my name to get called.
      Lexie (runs in): It's done.
      Alex: Oh, whatever Helen Keller.
      Lexie: No, I'm serious. The Chief sent me. They made the choice.
      George: Well, who is it?
      Lexie (points): It's you. (screen fade to white and the title card is shown)

    • Lexie: You made her speak. Mrs. Patterson, she said hi. She spoke. You made her speak. (walks in his place, right by him. He looks back at the door shocked, she just walked in) I respect you. As a man. As a surgeon, as a teacher. I respect you. So... teach me. (takes off her jacket)
      Mark: What are you doing? Don't do that. Stop.
      Lexie (taking off her shoes): Teach me.
      Mark (shuts his door): No. Stop.
      Lexie: Teach me.
      Mark: We can't do this, you're Little Grey, and I promised, and... I'm your teacher.
      Lexie: So... (takes off her sweater) Teach me.
      Mark: Oh, Lexie...
      Lexie: Teach me. Teach me. (takes off her tank top, so she's standing there in her bra) ... Come on, am I really so bad?
      Mark: No. ... I am. (kisses her)

    • George: I don't know if I'm more jealous of Alex or worried about Izzie. ... I think there's something wrong with her, Mer.
      Meredith: There's something wrong with all of us, George.

    • Richard: Dr. Dixon, how's your day been? You feel like you may have a home here at Seattle Grace?
      Virginia: Dr. Yang. You tortured her today, making her choose among her peers, some kind of emotional torture. Was that your intention?
      Richard: ...Yes.
      Virginia: ... Have your board make me a better offer.

    • Callie: So the new intern, Meredith's friend...
      Mark: The psycho with no appendix?
      Callie: Yeah. We talked. I mean, she came and talked to me... but it was more than that, y'know? A guy looks at you a certain way and you just know, but this whole girl thing it's so confusing.
      Mark: Well, was there touching?
      Callie: No.
      Mark: Was there playing with the hair?
      Callie: No.
      Mark: Was there licking of the lips?
      Callie: Oh... my God. I made it up. I made it up because I'm lonely and depressed and desperate for attention... from the new intern.
      Mark: Crazy new intern.
      Callie: Crazy hot...
      Mark: No. The hot ones are the ones who cause trouble, the ones who distract you from realising your true potential. You need to focus on the medicine. Take all that pent-up sexual energy you waste thinking about hot, young, naked, available interns and put it back into your genius. Your godliness. Build someone an organ, that's hot.
      Callie: She smiled, did I mention that she smiled.
      Mark: No hot interns! (Callie whines)

    • Cristina: Dr. Dixon. There you are. I'm Dr. Yang. (extends her hand, Dr. Dixon doesn't shake it) O-kay. Well, I've been assigned to work with you today. I was in the cardio lab looking for you, I'm so sorry that it took me so long.
      Virginia: There's a blank spot on this board, there's a surgery but no surgeon, I would like to do surgery, but it's an amputation, I haven't done an amputation since my residency.
      Cristina: Well, um, that's, that's, really hard to, um ...
      Virginia: Is your stuttering pathological and persistent or is it occasional and stress related?
      Cristina: I don't ... stutter?
      Virginia: I had persistent pathological stuttering as a child, but it can be treated with rigorous speech therapy.
      Cristina: Yes, ma'am. Thank you.
      Virginia: Why is this spot on the board blank?
      Cristina: I need to select one of my fellow residents for that slot, it's the first solo surgery of my class.
      Virginia: The Chief asked you to choose from your peers.
      Cristina: Yes, ma'am.
      Virginia: Mmm!

    • Alex (to Cristina): Dude, you were robbed. You got screwed by politics. The Chief needed a scapegoat, it's so unfair. (laughs) I'm sorry. I can't do this. I can kiss ass when I have to, but not yours. Uh... Below the knee amputation, make a tranverse incision in the midshaft of the tibia, elevate the periostium, cut the tibia and fibula with the bone saw, ligate the vascular bundles and release the turnakit. I've done four of 'em. One of a cadavar, three on STAN.

    • Meredith (closing voiceover): We enter the world alone and we leave it alone and everything that happens in between we owe it to ourselves to find a little company. We need help, we need support, otherwise we are in it by ourselves. Strangers, cut off from each other, and we forget, just how connected we all are. So instead, we choose love, we choose life, and, for a moment, we feel just a little bit less alone.

    • Meredith (opening voiceover): Mother called it the greatest and most terrifying moment in her life. Standing at the head of the surgical table, knowing that the patient's life depends on you and you alone. It's what we all dream about. Because the first person that gets to fly solo in the OR ... kind of a bad ass.

  • Notes

    • International Episode Titles:
      Slovakia: Odkázaný sám na seba (Self-reliant)
      Czech Republic: Já, jenom já (Me, only Me)

    • Original International Air Dates:
      Italy: March 30, 2009 on Fox Life
      Australia: April 2, 2009 on channel 7
      The Netherlands: April 6, 2009 on Net 5
      Latin America: April 6, 2009 on Sony Entertainment Television (aka Canal Sony)
      Germany: June 10, 2009 on ProSieben
      Norway: October 20, 2009 on TV2
      Slovakia: November 23, 2009 on STV1
      Czech Republic: April 22, 2010 on Prima

    • Music Featured In This Episode:
      1. They Said I Said by Sugarush Beat Company
      2. Winter Birds by Ray LaMontagne
      3. Secret by Max Morgan
      4. Street Lights by Kanye West

  • Allusions

    • George: I operated on a heart in an elevator.

      George is referring to the episode Bring The Pain (S2 Ep5) in which he and Alex get stuck in an elevator with a patient who crashes, and George performs the emergency surgery on the patient.

    • In this episode, Meredith says "That's one of us down there, show some respect" which is an allusion to when she said the same thing on the first episode about George during his surgery.

    • Episode Title: All By Myself

      The title of this episode is an allusion to the song All By Myself by Eric Carmen.

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