(Spoilers ahead. Although seriously, you should know what happened by now).
Because I am one of those people who is way too invested in their favorite shows, I have been analyzing who was gonna bite it on Grey's for weeks. Before the news that Meredith, Cristina, Alex and Derek were all coming back next year was released, I didn't think it was them anyway because I didn't think Shonda would kill off anymore of the original five and Derek should be exempt because he almost died already.
So I had narrowed down to Mark or Lexie and whenever I thought about it, I couldn't think of who I wanted to die less and could never come up with the answer.
But I wish it wasn't Lexie. I can say that now.
Watching her die was heartbreaking, especially because her and Mark had just gotten to a place where maybe they could be together again. And she died with Mark by her side, but seriously? SERIOUSLY? It's just so....unfair. Stunning. Kind of amazes me how upset I got over it, but killing off Lexie Grey? Her last name is in the show title!
If I had to pick, I would've prefered that Alex died. Because I love Alex, but his is the only character that doesn't have any budding relationships or anything of that caliber and even though he is one of the original players, it would've felt like less of a loss.
And I wonder where does the show go from here? It's based at Seattle Grace but as Cristina said, who really wants to work there again? These poor doctors have almost been run over. And shot at. And oh, um, Meredith WATCHED HER FREAKING SISTER DIE, FOR GODS' SAKE. And so the people for sure coming back next year, what does that mean? Where do we go from here? Is it time for them to hang up their labcoats and for the show to be over?
Cause honestly, I was almost hoping it would be cancelled after this year. Meredith and Derek were happy with their baby, Callie and Arizona were happy with their baby, and Mark and Lexie were *this close* to being together again! But no, instead Lexie has to die. In a way, it hurts more then when George died. I loved George, but because we didn't know it was him for most of that episode when Mer figured it out by that time it was more a reaction of... "That was George... and now he's gone?" It was more shock and then sadness. But this was watching poor Lexie die and dealing with it for another half hour.
Another thing about Lexie dying is that now (at least for me) whenever I watch an episode with Lexie, "reality goggles" will set in. This happens whenever I watch one of the early episodes, and smile at Meredith, George and Cristina all drunkenly dancing on a table, or Meredith, Izzie and George lying in bed together talking, that I then feel sad knowing that someday soon, there will be no more George. And now whenever I watch Derek attempt to explain to Meredith why she should care about her sister or Lexie striding into Mark's place, asking him to "teach her" and taking off her shirt, I;ll get that sad feeling that she too will be gone soon.
I don't know if this was Shonda's idea or Chyler's. Because if it was Chyler's idea, okay, she wants to move on, she has three kids of her own (I know, right? I couldn't believe it either) that I would understand. But if it was Shonda's idea, just for the shock value, why, girl? Couldn't April have just gotten pregnant or something instead?
This was a finale that was just... sad. Incredibly, incredibly sad.