The doctors of Seattle Grace are called upon to man up when a stampede at a comic book convention causes an influx of colorful characters in the OR-blurring the lines of fantasy and reality; Mark shows his softer side with baby Sofia when Arizona and Callie go out of town, but at work he continues to give Jackson a hard time; Ben returns to the OR, only to find that Nurse Eli has moved in on Bailey; and the male doctors bond over their frustrations with women.moreless
Dr. Teddy Altman
Dr. Arizona Robbins
Dr. April Kepner
Dr. Jackson Avery
Dr. Meredith Grey
Dr. Cristina Yang
Dr. Ben Warren
Jackson (about Mark & Derek): What do you think they're talking about?
Ben: My guess? Which one should take you to prom.
Derek: You're not getting laid. That's why you have this sudden interest in education.
Mark: When Richard asked you who should be the next chief did my name come up?
Derek: You just had a baby, you don't wanna be chief. And he didn't ask me.
Mark: But he'd asked?
Derek: You just had a baby. ... You know, a few weeks ago I knew exactly how the next ten years would play out; work, family. And then, I lost the trial, baby, and blacklisted by the FDA and Meredith... Some days I miss her so much I don't know if I'm gonna make it.
Mark: Did you tell Hunt any of this?
Derek: I did not.
Mark: Just checking.
Mark (walks up): Derek! You're trying to steal my guy. He's my guy. Avery go get in the car.
Jackson: What? No.
Mark: You've been moving in on him all week. You weren't even interested in him until you saw how much he meant to me. I don't take the time to teach anyone if I can help it.
Mark: But I'm takin' the time with Avery because he's a quick learner and he can do a c-plasty better than I could at his level.
Jackson: I can? (Mark turns to walk away)
Derek: Hey, hey. Don't do that. Don't just yell at me then walk away.
Mark: I'm not. It's just that Sofia likes it if I'm moving.
Owen: You guys talk. I'll take the baby.
Mark: Okay, careful. We had a scare this week. (hands Sofia to Owen) Thank you. Now, Avery go get in the car. Friends don't steal from each other.
Derek: It's not stealing if he asks to scrub in on my surgeries.
Mark: Oh, don't be a jackass.
Jackson: Okay, look. I apperciate this, I do. But if I have to choose, I choose plastics. I mean, I really apperciate being able to take the lead on your neuro surgeries but I feel like--
Mark (to Jackson): You usin' my boy here? To get more surgery? Nobody uses my boy. (Derek smiles, Jackson looks confused)
Alex: This is a bad idea. Shepherd hates me, I hate the woods. You know there are bears out here.
Jackson (they walk up to Derek): I hope you don't mind. I brought Karev.
Alex: Fifth year is really kickin' my ass. I mean, it's no excuse but I didn't mean to be disrespectful or whatever. Also, I lied about Mayfield just to be clear.
Derek: Mmhmm. (hands him a hammer)
Alex: Take a look.
Jackson (reading sign by door): 'Dr. Jason Mayfield. E.D. specialist.'
Alex: Room 22. Mayfield in 22. You told Bailey that you have erectile dysfunction.
Jackson: You told Shepherd.
Richard: Oh, Karev. There you are. Just read your paper. Excellent first draft. And oh, uh, don't hang out by Mayfield. People get the wrong idea.
Owen: Hello, I am Dr. Hunt. I'm the surgeon who repaired your broken jaw. I'm also the guy who broke it. Now, it's wired shut right now so, uh, I'll do the talking. Now, uh, they want me to come down here and apologize to you. Now, I want to make something quite clear. I feel good about what I did. I reviewed the security tape and I easily prevented a half of dozen of people from being injured, by you. You assaulted a girl with a beer bottle, you attacked hospital staff, you put a man on the critical list. You were violent and abusive in front of dozens of witnesses and I will stand up in any court of law and say just that. I do not apologize for things that I feel good about and I feel good about this. (grabs his jaw) So, you wanna sue, you sue. (gets up) And good luck with your recovery. (smiles)
Alex: What happened?
Mark: Well, you must've read the CT wrong or something because it's been over twenty seven hours and she still hasn't cried yet. Something's wrpng.
Alex: You wanna know why your kid isn't crying? Because she likes you, you're a good dad. You wanna see your kid cry? (pinches Sofia) There. Now she's crying.
Alex: Hey, how did you get out of your skills lab with Bailey?
Jackson: Oh, the Mayfield excuse.
Richard: You used the Mayfield excuse on Bailey?
Jackson (smiles): Yes, sir. (Richard laughs)
Jackson: Shepherd wants me in on his surgery, which is great, obviously, but I'm supposed to be in surgery with Sloan at the same time. How am I supposed to choose?
Richard: Who do you wanna work with more?
Jackson: I dig plastics, but I actually like to be able to operate.
Richard: You're choosing between two world class surgeons. This is not a problem. It's a privlidge. Embrace it.
Alex: Yeah, feel the joy.
Richard: Look at you.
Alex: Hey, I'm headed up to the lab. Webber's gonna show me his signature stitch. You wanna come?
Jackson: Crap. I'm supposed to help Bailey and April with a skills lab for the first years right now.
Alex: Grow a pair, bitch boy. (walks off)
Bailey (walking by): Hey, c'mon, Avery. Let's go.
Jackson: Actually, I forgot I have an appointment, so...
Bailey: An appointment? What appointment?
Jackson: Hmm? With Mayfield in 22.
April: Oh. O-Okay. Su-Sure, th-that, that's fine, right Dr. Bailey?
Bailey: Some things, Avery, I just don't need to know.
Richard: I know you feel like you have some place better to be right now. But you don't.
Alex: I just wanna finish my paper, sir.
Richard: Oh, it all falls away. The research, the tests, the papers, we do it to get to this.
Alex: Uh huh.
Richard: Adele does that.
Richard: She 'Uh Huhs' me. Every night when I fill her in on my day she nods and she gives me a lot of 'uh huhs' but I can tell she's uncomfortable because half the time she can't remember where I work and it makes her nervous when I say that I'm cutting people open. Sometimes you can't see the joyful part of your life until it's over. This is it, Karev. It's right now. You're in it.
Jackson: You guys always get worked up like this?
Derek: You should give it a try.
Jackson: No, I'm good. Just hammerin'.
Jackson: Thanks for this, by the way. I know Sloan's my boss and he's your friend, I wouldn't want to overstep. Not that I ever get a chance to overstep with him, since he has me on training wheels. (starts hammering the nails harder) Which is fine, most days, except when I get home and it turns out that my girlfriend who is a fourth year has done more surgery than me. And she asks me how my day went and my answer is: 'Great, sweetheart.' I just spent the last nine hours standing around watching your ex operate.
Owen: Legal says I should apologize to the drunk who tore up my ER.
Ben: She wasn't ready for a relationship, but now she's in one.
Owen: Right. Where's the accountablity? That's what I wanna know.
Ben: I had a meeting in the conference room on nine and had a great deal of difficulty concentrating.
Derek: You asked.
Ben: But you knew I really didn't want to know, but you told me anyway because you enjoy my pain.
Derek: Well, next time you won't ask.
Ben: You have a reputation of being a nice person, I think it's a load of crap.
Mark: Is it true you punched a guy?
Owen: Shep, I need a neuro consult.
Derek: Why because you punched a guy?
Richard (walks up): What's this I hear about you punching a guy?
Owen: Alright, yes. I punched a patient who was endangering the safety of my nurses, my residents and my other patients.
Mark: You know, you're the chief and not the sheriff, right?
Derek: Scan is clear.
Owen: Thank you, all of you, really.
Owen: Where is he?
Nurse: Around the corner.
Owen: Book OR two for possible concussion with a broken jaw.
Nurse: We have a patient with a broken jaw?
Owen: We're about to. (walks up to the guy who's freaking out and punches him, knocking him out)
Derek: I just swung by your office and you weren't there and neither was any of your furinature.
Owen: My office is where I am. (holds up a tablet)
Derek: You're really taken this not being chained behind your desk thing seriously.
Mark: She's usually a lot more alert than this. I sat up all night checking to make sure she was still breathing.
Alex: Well, maybe the reason she's not alert is because you kept her up all night.
Mark (pointing to the monitor): What's that? Right, there. See that?
Alex: Yeah, it's a perfectly healthy brain of a perfectly healthy baby who didn't need a CT scan. The baby's fine. And now I'm leaving.
Mark: Sofia rolled off the sofa last night and hasn't cried since. Something's wrong.
Alex: Yeah, I'm not a pediatrican, sorry.
Mark: If I tell anyone on peds, they'll call Arizona.
Alex: I got a paper to write.
Mark: You drop what you're doing right now or by the time I count to three I will end you. One, two... (Alex goes and looks at Sofia)
Owen: I don't understand. Your contractor doesn't care that you're building this deck yourself?
Derek: Well, I wouldn't say that. But he does work for me. If I didn't have this I'd kill my residents.
Derek: Ah, he's just not interested. The vertible cob was wide open, perfect view of the cord. It's beautiful, but he could careless. Just punching a time clock.
Owen: He's not Meredith.
Derek: No, he's not.
Owen: You know when you quit as chief I thought that you were out of your mind.
Derek: Now not so much?
Owen: Is it me, or is everyone in the hospital just waiting for me to fall on my face.
Derek: Oh, no, we all got money on it. I got you down for a hundred that you make it to at least six months. So, buck up.
Owen: I've been walking on eggshells at home for weeks, I thought work would let off steam but now, that's a nightmare, too.
Alex: Shepherd just kicked me off neuro because I don't piss myself every time I see a spine. The guy is a douche.
Richard: His wife was his resident and now he's got you. Tough act to follow.
Alex: Sorry, Chief.
Richard: Not the Chief.
Jackson: We're practicing microsurgery techniques.
Richard (after Alex eats a grape): Not for snacking. You two need a way to start feeling the joy again. I mean, there's gonna come a time when you were wishin' you were a fifth year again. Just to get back into the OR and get your hands dirty. You operate on a grape just so you keep from getting rusty.
Alex: You're in the OR all the time.
Richard: To supervise, sure. They'll bring me in on a really complicated part but I never open, never close.
Jackson: Is this a technique I could use during an ear reconstruction?
Richard: Now, you see there, Avery's starting to feel the joy. Pull up a grape.
Alex: Please, Sloan won't let him touch an instrument. He barely lets him finish a sentence.
Jackson: At least he lets me in the OR.
Richard: Can I get you a grape?
Alex: Thanks, but Robbins says she's kicking me to the curb if I don't publish. I gotta do my damn Africa paper. (walks out)
Jackson: Not feelin' the joy.
Alex: You think that since I'm operating in two places that this could count as two neuro surgeries?
Derek: Because you need to log more non-peds surgeries?
Derek: That's your question? Young man's spine is pulverized. You blink once and he may never walk again. And you don't wanna talk to me about the surgery, you wanna ask to see if you can get two gold stars instead of one?
Alex: No, I--
Derek: Just get out of here. You're off my service. Go.
Derek: You paged. What's goin' on?
Eli: Dr. Warren's resident punctured the dura of your patient from this morning during what should have been a routine epidural.
Ben: Okay, first of all, there is no such thing as anything routine after a patient's had surgery. And you have no right to yell at my resident.
Eli: There was spinal fluid all her bed.
Derek: How is the patient?
Ben: Just checked on her, she's stable and pain free.
Eli: Your resident was sloppy and rushed.
Ben: You don't know how difficult epidurals can be.
Eli: Because I'm a nurse?
Ben: Watch your tone with me.
Eli: Or what? What are you gonna do?
Derek: Okay, done. Done. Break it up. Walk away, we're done.
April: I've got an abodminal crush injury here.
Richard: Okay, I'm available.
Meredith: I have it, sir.
Richard: It- It's okay, Grey. I- I--
Meredith: I have it. It's a new routine for you, sir.
April: Okay, it looks like some lower extermity fractures--
Alex: Step out of the way, Chief.
Paramedic: I've got another one comin' in.
April: Ooh, dibs on footprint face.
Jill the Paramedic: I got an unconscious, sexy zombie nurse.
Cristina: Oh, I'll take it.
Richard (steps in front of her): Oh, no, this one is mine! This is my sexy zombie nurse. You hear that?
Alex: I don't know who Mayfield in 22 is but that's the first time Shepherd's been off my back all week.
Jackson: Webber knows things.
Alex: The guy's a freakin' genius.
Cristina (walks up): Who's a genius?
Jackson: Um, you look nice today.
Richard: Did you say big accident? How big is big exactly?
Owen: Hard to tell. All I know is the paramedics said to clear as many beds in the ER as possible.
Richard: Did they now? Okay, what else did they say?
Owen: Well, to prep the blood bank, we're gonna need a lot of blood.
Richard: Blood, blood. D-Did they say anything else?
Owen: Not much. It was hard to talk. There was a lot of commotion in the background, you know, some screaming and--
Richard (excited): Screaming?
Owen: Yeah, screaming. You know, I don't think I have ever triaged in a tie before.
Richard: Well, just tuck it in your belt, you'll be fine.
Richard: Sloan, um, uh, look I'm putting the word out, my case load has been pretty light these past few days so if you hear of any red meat on the floor--
Mark (watching Owen in his office): Look at him, actin' like he runs the place.
Richard: Well, he does.
Mark: He's hangin' on by his teeth. It's undignified.
Derek (walks up): What are you guys lookin' at?
Mark: Hunt's not cut out for the job.
Derek: What, somethin' happen?
Mark: Nothing happened. You can see it in his demenor. He's got fear in his eyes.
Derek: He's a decorated military officer. What do you think got to him? Call schedule? Lunch order? (smiles)
Mark: I'm just sayin' that when he bellyflops, I'm here for the hospital.
Richard: You're a good man.
Owen (walks up): Gentlemen, anything that I can do for you?
Mark: Just watching the magic.
Alex: You started already? I thought I was supposed to be lead surgeon on this case.
Derek: You forfeited that right by showing up twenty minutes late. Dr. Warren, when you were a fifth year were you late to surgery?
Ben: Are you kidding?
Derek: He's a professional.
Ben: And respectful to my OR staff.
Derek: Of your attending.
Ben: Definetly my attending. Dr. Grey was never late.
Derek: No, she was many things but late was never one of them. Karev here is just trying to stock away as many non-peds hours as possible.
Ben: Ah, slummin' it in neuro.
Alex: I'm sorry, I had an appointment with Mayfield in 22 it went a little long.
Ben: We- We didn't realize.
Derek: Why don't you come and finish up then?
Mark: It's three days. We're gonna be fine. (waving with Sofia's hand) Bye, mommies. Have fun at the conference mommies.
Arizona: Bye-bye, baby boo...
Arizona: Just one more kiss.
Mark: Go. Come on.
Callie: I'm gonna miss you so much.
Mark: Bye. See ya.
Arizona: Bye. (they leave)
Mark: It's just you and me kid. High five. (does a high five with Sofia) High five. Dap. Blow it up.
April: Okay, I get that you like to put your dirty clothes in my laundry because, frankly, if you didn't you'd never have any clean clothes. Fine. I will wash your dirty underpants. But you know what? I am not okay with washing your "skank of the week's" dirty underpants. (pulls out a lacey thong)
Jackson: Actually those are Lexie's, thank you.
April: Oh, she w...
Jackson: Oh, yeah.
April: Okay, never mind. (walks off)
Jackson: Not Lexie's.
Alex: Nope. Lauren, third floor, radiology.
Jackson: Oh, nice. (they bump elbows)
Derek: There are distinct differences, between male and female brains.
Richard: Female brains have a larger hippocampus... which usually makes them better at retention and memory.
Alex: Male brains have a bigger parietal cortex, which helps when fending off an attack.
Jackson: Male brains confront challenges differently than female brains.
Mark: Women are hardwired to communicate with language. Detail. Empathy. Men, not so much.
Owen: It doesn't mean we're any less capable of emotion.
Derek: We can talk about our feelings. It's just that, most of the time, we'd really rather not.
Alex: People say 'be a man.' People say it all the time.
Owen: But what does that even mean?
Richard: Is it about strength?
Owen: Is it about sacrifice?
Jackson: Is it about winning?
Mark: Maybe it's simplier than that.
Derek: You have to know when not to man up. Sometimes it takes a real man to set his ego aside, admit defeat, and simply start all over again.
Alex (after Richard takes his Africa paper to read it): Dude, give that back.
Richard: You gonna fight the Chief?
Alex: You're not the chief.
Richard: Once you're the President, you're always Mr. President
Jackson (Alex has his socks off): Great. I'm here to eat breakfast and it smells like feet.
Alex: What's another word for 'crappy'?
Jackson: Sucky. Suckidy. Stankish.
Alex: Shut up.
Jackson: You could go with ass-y, also, or ass-like.
Alex: You're ass-like.
Jackson: No, that toe jam on your feet is ass-like. Honestly, you ever bathe?
Alex: No, I got that damn Africa paper and boards. You know, fifth year blows. (Richard walks in, he takes his feet off the desk) Oh, hey, Chief. Sorry.
Richard: You don't have to apologize to me. You're at the top of the resident food chain. The world is your oyster. If you wanna waste your time bitching about it, well that's your business. Hey, have you heard anything about anything big coming in today? Like a car accident or a building collaspe?
Alex (laughs): Chief, are you trolling for cases?
Jackson: Well, don't you have a laminectomy with Shepherd today?
Alex: Yeah but that's a snooze fest.
Jackson: No, don't you have it now? Right now?
Alex (looks at clock): Oh, damnit. Shepherd is gonna have my ass. Damnit!
Richard: Wait, wait. Just tell him you had an appointment with Mayfield in 22 and it ran long. He'll understand.
Alex: Yeah, okay, thanks, Chief.
Richard: N-Not the chief. Not the chief.
Derek: I get why you're mad at the guy but if you're gonna have a fight about Bailey, do it on your own time.
Ben: Fight about Bailey? Wait, no. No, Bailey's with him?
Derek: I should go.
Ben: Wait, like, they went to dinner once or twice or...
Derek: You really don't wanna know.
Derek: Don't go into the conference room on eight or nine without knocking.
Ben: Oh, come on.
Derek: You asked.
Ben: Does she talk about him?
Derek: Yeah, she said his hands have a kind of tenderness, uh some kind of magic.
Ben: You're an ass.
Derek: Don't yell at my nurses, even the men.
Ben: Sure. Just drop a bomb and walk away.
Meredith: What are you starting with?
Meredith: Are you doing it open or endoscopically?
Derek: No, I'm not gonna do this.
Derek: You're the one who left neuro.
Meredith: I know.
Derek: And I'm not gonna do this whole thing where you're sad about every case that I'm on.
Meredith: I'm not sad. I'm trying to start a conversation.
Derek: Okay, well, make conversation about something else.
Although credited, Chyler Leigh (Dr. Lexie Grey) does not appear in this episode.
Original International Air Dates:
Canada: October 6, 2011 on CTV
Sweden: October 26, 2011 on Kanal 5
Germany: April 18, 2012 on ProSieben
Norway: May 1, 2012 on TV2
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