Growing Pains

Season 4 Episode 18

The Recruiter

0
Aired Unknown Mar 15, 1989 on ABC

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  • Trivia

    • In the final scene, Maggie sits at the kitchen table, feeding Chrissy, with just a baby food jar in front of them, but in the final shot before the credits roll, a coffee mug suddenly appears in front of Maggie.

  • Quotes

    • Carol: Mike, Mom and Dad went to Boston College. They met there. They fell in love there. They did God knows what there.

    • Carol: Mike, I need your help.
      Mike: I know. But I don't do electrolysis.

    • Carol: Now, I figured the plan out, but you have got to help me.
      Mike: Why have I "got to help you?"
      Carol: Because. Because you're my brother and you love me.
      (Mike gives a bemused look)
      Carol: Because you're a scumbucket and I'll give you 20 bucks?
      Mike: Done deal.

    • Mike: Alright, what's your plan?
      Carol: Actually, you gave me the idea when you said I should blow the interview by belching and smelling bad.
      Mike: (sniffs Carol) Okay. But can you belch?

    • (Carol explained her plan)
      Mike: All right, Carol! You know, Carol, it saddens me when I think of what a sleazemeister you could have been if you'd only applied yourself when you were young.

    • Carol: Alright, now, I'll meet you downstairs in an hour.
      Mike: Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Come on, you expect me to get a whole new set of parents in an hour? I couldn't do that in a day! I've tried.

    • Carol: Maybe, maybe we can clear Fred up and put one of Dad's suits on him. But Wilma has no teeth!
      Wilma: Hey! I got teeth. Just didn't bring 'em with me, that's all.

    • Mr. Jefferson: So, uh, I'm anxious to meet your parents.
      Carol: Well, only my dad's gonna be here. My mom, as you know, is a news reporter and she's out of town on a story.
      Mr. Jefferson: Oh, I understand. "All the news that's fit to print." (laughs)
      Carol: Actually, it's television news.
      Mr. Jefferson: Oh, well, if you don't tell anybody, neither will I.

    • Fred: (posing as Jason) Say, can I get you a sherry?
      Mr. Jefferson: No, thank you.
      Fred: Great! More for me.

    • Mr. Jefferson: I'm sorry your wife won't be joining us this evening.
      Fred: (posing as Jason) Oh, yes. I'm sick about the fact that Mickey can't be here.
      Mr. Jefferson: Mickey? Isn't that Maggie?
      Fred: Uh, Mickey's just my pet name for her when we're in the sack.

    • Mr. Jefferson: Well, Carol, let me begin by saying that your high school grades are nothing short of spectacular.
      Carol: Thank you.
      Mike: Hey, do you believe she got those straight-As after missing six whole months because of reform school?
      Mr. Jefferson: Reform school?
      Carol: Little misunderstanding over a knife.
      Fred: We're damn proud of the little slut.

    • Mr. Jefferson: Dr. Seaver, is this what you told Carol Boston College is like?
      Fred: Well, to tell you the truth, bub, I don't remember much about the actual classes. Me and Maggie were pretty much into discovering our bodies back then. That's actually how Mike here came along.

    • Ben: Man, I knocked the snot out that little kid. I think I knocked a couple of teeth loose. Isn't that great, Dad?
      Mike: Yeah! Just like you said, right, Pop?
      Fred: Oh, right, right. Like I always tell ya, son, never be scared to sucker punch somebody just 'cause they're a girl in a lower grade.

    • Mike: Listen, Fred, Fred. How would you like to double your money for another part–a college recruiter?
      Fred: A challenging dual role??? Okay!

    • (Fred asked for sherry)
      Jason: Sorry, I'm all out. Can I get you anything else?
      Fred: Uh, sure.
      Jason: What?
      Fred: Like you said, "anything else."

    • Fred: (posing as Mr. Jefferson) Uh, Carol, what's your number one reason for attending Boston University?
      Maggie: Uh, isn't it Boston College?
      Fred: Well, it's obvious you haven't read the alumni flyers. We're expanding into a full university!

    • Fred: Have you thought about a major yet?
      Carol: Well, actually I was planning on...
      Fred: Lemme guess. You're going to follow in your old man's footsteps and study, uh, podiatry.
      Jason: Psychiatry.
      Fred: Excuse me. I believe this is Carol's interview.

    • Jason: Carol, are you implying that your mother and I created an atmosphere in which you could not tell us how you felt?
      Carol: I'm not implying it. I'm flat out saying it!
      Maggie: So you went through this whole charade just so you wouldn't hurt our feelings?
      Carol: Yes! And if you look at it in that light, my deception was... was an act of love.
      Maggie: Don't push it, Carol.

  • Notes

  • Allusions

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