Festus (to Doc): "Well, now when a doctor doctors another doctor .. well does a doctor that's a doin' the doctorin', doctor the doctor that's a gettin' doctored the way that the doctor that's a doin' the doctorin' wants to doctor the doctor that's a gettin' doctored. Or does the doctor that's a gettin' doctored tell the doctor that's a doin' the doctorin' to doctor the doctor that's gettin' doctored the way that the doctor that's........ (Festus and Doc both leave the Long Branch as the show ends)
Doc (to Festus): "I don't know which tooth is bothering you. But I know one thing, it certainly is not a wisdom tooth."
Festus: "The way it appears to me, a doctor's supposed to be patient with his patients expecting him to have patience. And you're just a gonna wind up to where you ain't got no patients if you don't start a havin' some patience, I'll tell ya that!"
"Matthew, have you ever seen that thingamajig that Doc jobs down your goozler?" Festus asking Matt about Doc's medical instruments.
Benny Rubin (1899-1986) was a comedian, character actor and dialectician in show business for almost 70 years. He was a semi-regular on the Jack Benny Program, and had many television and film credits, but he is probably best remembered as the Hollywood Tour Bus Driver who drives off and leaves Lucy and Ethel stranded in front of Richard Widmark's house in the I Love Lucy episode, "The Tour" (May 30,1955).