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Hannah: I'll see you all when I get back from my very first European tour. I know I can't wait! Swiss chocolate, Italian shoes and French boys, ooh la la!
Robbie: Ooh la la? Uh uh uh! The closest she's coming to Paris is Paris, Texas!
-
Lilly: (About the midterm) Miley! We got the plan!
Oliver: But if you don't like it, it was all her idea.
Lilly: (sarcastically) Way to sell it, Oliver!
Oliver: Sorry! I only have one chest hair, and I need it for gym class!
-
Oliver: Hold up people. If you need a B, all you have to do is ace the mid-term tomorrow. (Oliver whispers to Lilly) How did she miss that, no wonder she's flunking biology.
(Miley grabs Oliver by the chest)
Oliver: Ow!
Miley: If I could ace the midterm I wouldn't have a problem, now would I?
Oliver: And if I stayed friends with you, I'll never have chest-hair will I?
-
Miley: The ribs attach to sacrum. No, no, no sternum, which attaches to a bone that ends in ila, or, or una, or... Oprah! Yeah, that's it. It's my Oprah! And I'm a doperah who's never going to Europa!
-
Snowball: Robbie rocks!
Robbie: And don't you forget it!
-
Miley: But I...
Ms. Kunkle: Will be glad to, Ms. Kunkle. Took the words out of your mouth, didn't I?
Miley: Yes, ma'am. Yanked 'em out like a hungry raccoon in a donut shop dumpster.
Ms. Kunkle: A lot of people must find those country sayings charming. I'm from Detroit. We don't find anything charming.
-
(Oliver puts ketchup on his face and screams)
Oliver: Oh, man! Oh, it's a nose bleed!
Lilly: Oh, it's a gusher!
Oliver: A gusher! That's what it is. Look everyone, it's a gusher!
Ms. Kunkle: Oken, Oken, honestly. Paper cuts, bitten tongues, and now nose bleeds. We should put you in a helmet!
-
(Singing)
Robbie: I want my mullet back...
Snowball: My messy cage and my eight track...
Robbie: My swingin' perch and my water bowl...
Robbie and Snowball: Robbie and Snowball gonna' rock and roll!
-
Lilly: She can't do it without dancing. We gotta distract Kunkle.
Oliver: I'm on it. Should I do paper-cut-bit-my-tongue or nose bleed?
Lilly: Ooh, nose bleed's my favorite!
Oliver: Then sit back, cause you're in the splashing zone!
-
Rico: Yeah, what was I thinking? As if this bubble brain could ever pull off something like that!
Oliver: Yeah, bubble brain! You got that right! We're talking nothing upstairs!
Lilly: (Lifts Miley's hair) Hey Oliver, I can see you!
Oliver: Oh, I see you too!
-
Rico: (About the Bone Dance) That song...those moves...your voice...it all reminds me of some famous singer.
Miley: Kelly Clarkson?
Lilly: Hilary Duff?
Oliver: Jay-Z!
-
Jackson: Hey Thor, what's up?
Thor: Oh Jackson, it's old Snowball! The landlord says we gotta get rid of him, but how can I do that I love him so much! I mean old Snowball not the landlord but he seems very nice. I need a hug!
Jackson: WHOA, WHOA, WHOA,Dude! In California, when a guy says, "What's up?" The other guy says, "Not much" and then we move on!
Thor: Ah, Thor, ya dumb buddy. Okay, lets try it again.
Jackson: Okay, good. Hey Thor, what's up?
Thor: Oh Jackson, the landlord says (hugs Jackson)
Jackson: WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA Dude! We also, we don't hug! We occasionally slap butts, but only on the football field!
Thor: oh, Then I owe the janitor an apology.
-
Jackson: (To Snowball) This is exactly why you're going back to Thor's, you stupid bird brain!
Ms. Kunkle: Morning, Stewart.
Snowball: Stupid bird brain!
Ms. Kunkle: Detention, Stewart.
-
Robbie: All right, Snowball, we're gonna take five. But when I get back, I'm teaching you "Wanna Be Your Joe."
Snowball: Robbie rocks!
Robbie: And don't you forget it.
-
Rico: I'll give you the secret to my success, but share this with no one.
Miley: Yeah, sure, whatever. Teach me.
Rico: Okay, open the book.
Miley: (Opens Biology book) Check.
Rico: Look at the page.
Miley: Check.
Rico: Close the book.
Miley: What?
Rico: That's it. Good luck on the test!
Miley: You didn't teach me anything!
Rico: Don't you have a photographic memory like me?
Miley: No.
Rico: Then you're on your own, toots!
-
Miley: Oh, Rico?
Rico: Hey, bubble brain, how's it going?
Miley: Oh, smart, funny and...
Lilly: Dead-on about that bubble brain.
(Miley gives her a look)
Lilly: But just in Biology. Other than that, you're sharp as a tick.
Miley: That's tack.
Lilly: You see?