Have Gun - Will Travel

Season 2 Episode 23

The Return of the Lady

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Aired Saturday 9:30 PM Feb 21, 1959 on CBS
7.8
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Episode Summary

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The Return of the Lady
AIRED:
Diana Coulter (The Lady, Episode 49) wires Paladin and asks him to come to her wedding to "give the bride away".

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  • The Lady from an earlier episode, remained in San Francisco as one of Paladin's lovers. Tiring of sharing him, she goes west to work. Her new employer decides to marry her, regardless of her wishes. Paladin rescues her and they renew their relationshipmoreless

    9.1
    The Lady is convincing as Paladins lover and good friend. The story is right out of the remances of the early 1900's, bringing our hero to rescue the lady from a mistake of her own making.



    The women in the audience finally get to see Paladin kiss the girl as if he really means it - something that must have been much appreciated.

Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions

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  • TRIVIA (0)

  • QUOTES (10)

    • B.G.: Paladin, I'm a king in these parts. Some day all this country's going to belong to a son of mine. Now, I've seen the son' of other rich men. Flabby, slack-jawed. Bloodless jellyfish. It's because their fathers used less sense in their own mating than in, in breeding a herd of steers. Well, the B.G. brand is gonna be the finest breed in this state. Whether in the cattle--or the sons.

    • Diana: I feel rather sorry for B.G.
      Paladin: Oh?
      Diana: It's the first time anyone's made him look foolish.
      Paladin: Man who needs twenty men to get his bride to the altar, I'd call that a lot worse than foolish.
      Diana: He's not a bad man, really. If it weren't for that monstrous vanity and ambition.
      Paladin: "Pride goeth before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall." And those are the qualities I'm counting on to get us out of here. Alive.

    • (B.G. steps out to confront Paladin alone.)
      Diana: You're not going to kill him?
      Paladin: What if I have no other choice? What if I have to shoot him or let you marry him?
      Diana: Are you asking me to decide?
      Paladin: No. If I'm forced to kill a man, I make the decision myself.

    • Paladin: Hey Boy? Why are you standing there? Don't tell me you haven't read the telegram.
      Hey Boy: I read. Now I wanna see your face.
      Paladin: Oh? (Opens the telegram and reads it silently.) Being married the twenty-sixth; please come to give away the bride. B.G. Ranch. Ask anyone in Texas. Diane Coulter. (Paladin stands up and starts to move away.)
      Hey Boy: Plenty big shock, I bet you.
      Paladin: Don't you have anything else to do?
      Hey Boy: You know, you're jealous like anything, uh? Such nice English lady. Maybe she get tired of waiting around for you, sure enough. You go Texas? You give bride away?
      Paladin: Well, Hey Boy, isn't that what I usually do with brides? Give them away?

    • (In his guest room, Paladin notices that an armoire is trembling, and approaches it, gun drawn.)
      Paladin: All right, come on out of there. Come on! (Diana emerges.) Well. Diana? Congratulations.
      Diana: You're angry with me, aren't you?
      Paladin: Now, why should I be? You don't owe me anything.
      Diana: Is that all I meant to you?
      Paladin: Let's keep it in the present tense, shall we? The only reason I'm here is to give the bride away.
      Diana: How cold and virtuous you make that sound. How do you think I felt, left alone in San Francisco? While you were off slaying dragons or liberating enchanted castles? Or saving new damsels in distress? All for a suitable fee, of course!

    • B.G.: Paladin, I'm a king in these parts. Someday all this country's going to belong to a son of mine. Now, I've seen the sons of other rich men. Flabby, slack-jawed. Bloodless jellyfish. It's because their fathers used less sense in their own mating than in, in breeding a herd of steers. Well, the B.G. brand is gonna be the finest breed in this state. Whether in the cattle--or the sons.

    • (Diana has come briefly to the dining room to "meet" Paladin, then leaves again.)
      B.G.: A queen among women. She just has to be taught her place.

    • (Having told B.G. that Diana has been to Paladin's room--twice--Vance is startled that B.G. still intends to go through with the wedding. B.G. walks to a cabinet and pulls out a sword.)
      B.G.: You see that? Honi soit qui mal y pense. My great-grandaddy was given this sword by the Duke of Wellington. The Iron Duke. For bravery in the field. You know what it means? "Evil to him who evil thinks."
      Vance: And them's the words you live by.
      B.G.: I'm foundin' a dynasty, here. My great, great grandchildren'll know these words before they're able to stand up. That's why I have to marry a lady.


    • Diana: Paladin, if we do get out of here--what then?
      Paladin: You asking for a prediction or a promise?
      Diana: You won't change your ways for anybody.
      Paladin: If I could, you'd be all the reason I'd ever need.

    • Paladin: Diana, will you do me one favor? Before you accept any more tutoring jobs, no matter how generous the fee, will you consult me first?
      Diana: That seems a fair request. And I accept on one condition. That you make yourself available--for consultation.

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