Hercules: The Legendary Journeys

Season 4 Episode 6

Two Men and a Baby

Aired Monday 5:00 PM Nov 03, 1997 on USA



  • Trivia

  • Quotes

    • Ares: You can keep the brat! He's not worth the aggravation. He's too much like you. But I'll be seeing you again, Brother.
      Hercules: Every time you turn around, Brother.

    • Hercules: (finding out Nemesis lied about him being Evander's father) If I said, 'I understand,' I'd be lying to you. I don't. Why would you get involved with Ares?
      Nemesis: Ares came to me. He promised I could be a God again if I gave him a son. I was afraid of being mortal – not knowing what to expect. I was weak and foolish. I believed him.
      Hercules: Ares never kept a promise in his never-ending life.
      Nemesis: But, I'm glad he didn't. It would've been a big mistake. I don't want to be one of them any longer. Oh, the Gods laugh, and they play, but I don't know one who feels real joy. They have more than enough passion, but do you know one who really loves? Would I love my little Evander the same if I didn't have this mortal heart? I like my life the way it is now.
      Hercules: But why would Ares be after Evander? He cares nothing for any of his children.
      Nemesis: Evander inherited some qualities from his father. (Evander belches a fire-ball)
      Hercules: Whoa. What have you been feeding this kid?!

    • Discord: Why don't we simplify? I'll kill Hercules. I'm a God, I've got the goods.
      Ares: As much as I admire your... goods... I'm afraid it won't work. You see, one God cannot kill another. And I don't even wanna think about the penalty. Unfortunately Zeus has extended the rule to protect my mongrel half-God brother as well.
      Discord: So how's a baby mortal gonna do the job?
      Ares: Well, that's just it. He's not all mortal. You see, like my brother, the baby has some Godly blood as well. And the 'don't kill' rule doesn't apply if the one doing the killing is not a full God.
      Discord: I get it, I get it! He's Hercules' son! You'll use his own son to kill him! Oh, you're so bad.

    • Hercules: You don't care about your son.
      Ares: Oh, I care in my own way. You see, Evander fully grown will become your worst nightmare – yours and all those good men you care so much about.
      Hercules: I will not give him to you.

    • Hercules: Hey, Evander. I'll be back to see you every chance I get. And before you know it, I'll be teaching you how to wrestle and throw the discus. You don't know it now, but one day, you'll realize you're different. And you'll wanna be like everyone else, but you never will be. You're special. You're very special. And that means you can make a difference. It's not an easy life to live, but I'll be around to help. I will always be there for you. Always.

    • Hercules: (spotting his ex-girlfriend) Nemesis?!
      Iolaus: Uh oh.
      Hercules: What?
      Iolaus: Nemesis.

    • Iolaus: (coming back with milk for Evander) Who says cows give milk?! No way. You have to take it!
      Hercules: You're a wreck.
      Iolaus: Yeah? You should see the cow!

    • Ares: And don't you dare deviate from my plan.
      Discord: Telling a deviant not to deviate, that's not fair!

    • Ares: (when Hercules vows to see Evander grow up to be good) Good?! What good is a good man? He has a shot at greatness!

    • Iolaus: (as he and Nemesis both hang over a cliff) Get Nemesis first! I'll take my chances!
      Hercules: I'd say your chances are close to zero.
      Iolaus: Yeah? Well, that's better than nothing.

    • Meniskos: It never fails. Ares hand picks a general, a general with a record scratched in blood- a superb tactician, a military genius! But as soon as he feels the hand of Ares, as soon as he is called into Ares' personal service, he becomes a boob! It has happened to others, and now it has happened to me! I wish I were back in the field. How I would welcome an afternoon of pillaging. This is so degrading!
      Ares: (coming up behind him) Unhappy with your commission, Meniskos?!

    • Ares: How did you get rid of the previous tenants?
      Discord: They all kind of went mad and slaughtered each other.
      Ares: You and your pranks.

  • Notes

    • Disclaimer: No fire-belching, levitating, neo-natal, sons of a god were harmed during the production of this motion picture.

  • Allusions