Hey Dude

Season 3 Episode 10

Killer Ernst

Aired Weekdays 2:00 PM Jun 08, 1990 on Nickelodeon

Episode Recap

Mr. Ernst is in his office going over profits when he hears a wrestling match on the radio. He starts doing some of the moves and ends up injuring himself. He gets up and has a crooked neck, but decides to just put a tie on and maybe nobody will notice. Mr. Ernst calls a meeting and says they need an event. Mr. E says they are going to stage a wrestling match at the Bar None: Captain Lou versus The Masked Marauder. Mr. Ernst says he cleared everything with the promoter and he is installing three extra phone lines just to take orders. Even though Mr. E doesn't want to at first Jake is finally able to fix his uncles neck.

Orders are coming in faster than the staff can keep up. Mr. E is on the phone when Jake shows him a package that came. Inside is the Masked Marauder's costume. Mr. E figures he sent it ahead. He leaves to hang the costume up. Just then Captain Lou comes barging in the lodge. He heads straight for the desk and is very demanding. He wants raw meat in his room, a wakeup call every twenty minutes, and a whirlpool. Captain Lou doesn't seem very pleased with the service. Jake and Danny take him to get settled in. The mail arrives with dozens of orders. Mr. E bends down to pick up the mail and hurts his back. He wants Jake, but Brad tells him he is with Captain Lou. Mr. E goes to meet Lou plus he heard "he's a real nice guy".

The ring is all set up and Mr. E is talking to Lou. Lou wants to know where the press and photographers are. He tells Mr. E that he wrestled Hulk Hogan last year. Mr. E sends Buddy to get his camera. Captain Lou wants to know why there are "geeks" in the stand. Mr. E says those are the guests and they want to watch him train. Lou tells Ernst that nobody watches him train and if he catches anybody watching he is going to rip Ernst's spleen out. Mr. E goes to get the contract to go over some details. Lou goes over to Danny who is working on the ring and offers him some pineapple orange juice. Danny accepts and Lou pours him a cup. Danny spits it out and says it is sour. He asks what the date is and Lou replies "a year ago last April". Lou says the juice keeps his blood pumping. Mr. E returns with the contract. Lou says he changed his mind. Mr. Ernst thinks he means about the guests watching, but Lou says he is out of here. His room is too small, the bed is full of lumps and the ring is in poor condition. Lou says he is pulling out. Ernst says if it is money maybe he can come up with his whole take up front in cash. Jake and Brad arrive and says there is a call he needs to take. Mr. Ernst tells Jake he is suppose to be on phone duty. Jake replies that he really needs to take the call. Mr. Ernst adds a new paragraph about cash up front to the contract and Lou signs making it official.

In his uncles office, Jake tells him the promoter called and said the Marauder can't wrestle because their was a kiln explosion at his house. Mr. E says they can just call off the match, but then he remembers that he promised Captain Lou his money up front. He figures out what the damage would be if he pays Captain Lou, refund tickets, plus the extra phone lines and it equals "were out of business".

Outside, Mr. E is trying to figure out how to approach Captain Lou. He debates telling him the contract isn't legal since it wasn't notarized, but he figures Lou would kill him. Jake comes out with the Marauder's costume and Danny tells him he is going to be The Masked Marauder and wrestle Captain Lou. Jake spoke with the promoter who gave his approval. Mr. E doesn't want any part. Captain Lou comes over and is angry because his meat isn't raw. He states that he would like to get Ernst in the ring for two or three minutes. He goes to find the ice machine. Jake tells his uncle, Lou isn't so big and we see Lou in the background carrying the ice machine. Mr. E says he'll get in the ring if it will save the ranch.

Jake and Brad are helping Mr. Ernst work out. Mr. E falls in the mud pits during the obstacle course. Jake says they'll go with "Plan B" having a nice long talk with Captain Lou. Ringside, Captain Lou wants to know where the Marauder is so they can rehearse the match. Captain Lou says he just won't rehearse the match he will bounce him around, hurt him, and loosen a few teeth. Mr. E tells Lou that he is going to take the Marauder's place. Lou tells him to say his prayers. Buddy asks his father how much life insurance he has.

The night of the match, Mr. Ernst, in full Marauder gear, has trouble getting in the ring. He tells Jake he can't see without his glasses. Jake tells him he doesn't have to see just run. Captain Lou gets in the ring carrying a two by four and Ernst tries to escape, but the kids shove him back in. Lou snaps the board over his own head. The match begins, Mr. E starts running, but Lou throws him into the ropes and clotheslines him. Then he starts punching him. Ernst gets up, but Lou shoves him back into the ropes causing Ernst to get tied up and Lou starts kicking him. Mr. E tries to escape, but Lou gets his foot and pulls him back in the ring. Move after move Lou takes it to Mr. Ernst. Mr. Ernst starts dictating his will to Buddy, but Lou pulls him away. Brad asks Jake what is next. Jake says Mr. E should play dead. Captain Lou continues to pound Mr. E so hard he thinks he is a kid again. Jake pretends to call Mr. E using his mother's voice and just as Lou goes to head butt him Ernst moves out of the way. Lou goes crashing into the turnbuckle knocking himself out. Ernst gets the cover and wins the match.

In his office after the match, the promoter calls Mr. Ernst, who has a neck brace and sling on his arm, to see who he wants to wrestle next. Mr. Ernst says he is wrestling no one. The promoter tells him that isn't what his manager said, he came in with a signed contract for a Samoan tag team match. Mr. E asks what manager. The promoter tells him Jake. Mr. E goes to find him, but falls down on his crutches.