Home Improvement

Season 5 Episode 21

Engine And A Haircut, Two Fights

Aired Unknown Mar 12, 1996 on ABC
out of 10
User Rating
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Episode Summary

Engine And A Haircut, Two Fights

When Brad comes home with a very unconventional new haircut, Jill tries hard to hold her tongue, although Tim might have a thing or two to say about it. Meanwhile, Randy is excited to audition for the lead role in Romeo and Juliet, but he's not too thrilled about receiving help from his overzealous mother.


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    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


    • TRIVIA (1)

      • Outtakes: Tim getting tongue-tied when he tries to say the line about bad haircuts leading to earrings, tattoos and crime.

        Tim saying "Home Improvement" when he meant to say "Tool Time."

    • QUOTES (16)

      • Tim: What's the problem?
        Jill: Wilson's a more convincing thirteen-year-old girl than I am.
        Tim: I don't think you're the one with the problem.

      • Mark: Dad, I hope you'll never get mad at me like you did at Brad.
        Tim: I won't have to get mad at you like I got at Brad. You'll never come home with a haircut that looks like the back of Mr. Ed. (Brad comes in)
        Brad: So you're measuring for the new engine? Obviously you're not listening to me.
        Tim: I thought you didn't care about the hot rod, Brad.
        Brad: I don't. If you want to mess up the hot rod by sticking in the wrong engine, that's your business. You're not gonna have any help from me anyway.
        Tim: I don't need your help, Brad.
        Brad: Fine!
        Tim: Well, fine!
        Brad: Fine!
        Tim: No, fine!
        Brad: Double fine!
        Tim & Brad: Fine, fine, fine, fine! (Brad leaves, slamming the door)
        Tim: (To Mark) Did I mention that you were my favorite son? (Mark gives Tim a skeptical look)

      • Tim: I'm not taking you down to the hot rod shop looking like that.
        Brad: Just because of my hair?
        Tim: You got it.
        Jill: Tim, come on you promised you'd take him.
        Brad: No, no, no, you know, Mom, I don't wanna go anymore. I mean, I don't give a crap about his hot rod or his stupid engine.
        Tim: Don't talk to me like that.
        Brad: Don't worry, I won't be talking to you.
        Tim: I won't be talking to you either.
        Brad: Fine.
        Tim: Well double fine.
        Tim & Brad: Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine!

      • Tim: What the hell happened to you?
        Brad: I got a haircut.
        Tim: With what? A weed whacker?

      • Jill: I was the best Juliet ever at the Hockaday School for girls. I also was their best Othello.
        Randy: I'm sure you were a very convincing black man.

      • (Jill is upset because Randy is rehearsing with Wilson)
        Wilson: Young Randy came out here and beseeched me to rehearse with him.
        Jill (to Randy):You beseeched him!?
        Randy: I didn't beseech him! I don't even know what beseech means!

      • Tim (watching Jill recite Shakespeare): You know, me thinketh she stinketh.

      • Tim: None of your friends have haircuts like this.
        Brad: Well, you're the one who's always telling me not to be exactly like my friends. I mean, if all my friends jumped in a lake, would you want me to do it too?
        Tim: With hair like that, I'd encourage you to join in!

      • Tim (before Brad gets his hair cut): Maybe this time you'll let the barber actually touch the scissors to your hair.
        Brad: What are you talking about? Last time he took off almost a quarter of an inch.
        Tim: Quarter of an inch, I've got more hair in my nose than that.

      • (Tim and Jill argue about Brad's haircut)
        Tim: Next thing you know, he'll want an earring. Earrings turn to tattoos, tattoos turn to crime, crime turns to jail, and another bad haircut!

      • Jill: How did the audition go, should I call you Randy or Romeo?
        Randy: Well, until they make up their minds, you can call me Randy-o.

      • Brad: Power isn't everything.
        Tim: Bite your tongue, Brad!

      • (Demonstrating how to build a wall out of beer cans)
        Tim: Use light beer cans, and your wall's less filling.

      • Tim: Kids turn into their parents, I don't know what it is. One day you're going to turn into me.
        Brad: Boy, I'm gonna need a lot of medical insurance.

      • Tim: If my mother hadn't been strict with me, I would have gotten into a lot of trouble.
        Jill: You did get into a lot of trouble.
        Tim: Yes, but even though I was in trouble, I always had a very neat and attractive haircut!

      • Tim: Ice-cold pop for my favorite son.
        Mark: I'm your favorite son?
        Tim: No, you're my last hope. One son looks like a sumo wrestler, the other one's in there putting moves on his mother.

    • NOTES (0)

    • ALLUSIONS (1)

      • Tim: At your age, I would have killed to look like Ringo.
        Brad: Who?
        Tim: Ringo, Fab Four, yeah yeah yeah.

        Tim is referring to Ringo Starr, the drummer for the Beatles, a.k.a. the Fab Four. His, "Yeah yeah yeah," comment is probably a reference to the chorus of the Beatles song "She Loves You."