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Season 8 Episode 22

Loose Lips And Freudian Slips

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Aired Unknown May 04, 1999 on ABC
8.7
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Loose Lips And Freudian Slips
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Jill's thesis is before the committee. During Mark's student film viewing, Jill's psychology professor sees Jill criticize him and Jill is worried that this will affect the thesis committee's decision.

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    • TRIVIA (0)

    • QUOTES (13)

      • Brad: (reading Jill's thesis) "When a mother tries to instill feminine ideology in her son, and the father presents a counter philosophy/ethos, it creates confusion in the adolescent male." Hmm. Sounds good to me.
        Jill: You understand that?
        Brad: No, but I'm a confused adolescent male.

      • (Mark's video is being shown to the class)
        Brad in the video: Hey Mom, how was your day?
        Jill in the video: You really wanna know how my day was?
        Brad in the video: Not really.
        Jill: Uh oh.
        Tim: What?
        Jill in the video: Well, it was going great. Until I had this awful conference with this horribly arrogant professor of mine.
        Jill: Please don't mention his name, please don't mention his name!
        Tim: You didn't, you didn't, you didn't!
        Jill in the video: Dr. Hanover.
        Tim: You did!
        Jill in the video: He's a pompous jackass, you know? He's smug. I mean, what's the deal with men, you know, and their comb-overs? I mean, this one is starting at his neck and stretching across.
        (Watching this, Jill looks shocked)
        Brad: Good one.

      • Brad: Mom, are you ever gonna get off the phone? I gotta make some calls.
        Jill: Use your phone.
        Brad: I can't. I'm downloading some hot pictures from Denmark--
        (Jill hangs up the phone and gives him a suspicious look)
        Brad: --of Danishes.

      • (Jill is on the phone with Gregory)
        Jill: Hello, Gregory?
        Gregory: Yeah.
        Jill: Hi, uh, this is Mrs. Taylor, Mark's mom. Great film.
        (Gregory is in his closet)
        Gregory: Are you kidding? I was so traumatized by the public viewing, I just spent two hours on the phone with an army recruiter.
        Jill: Interesting. Uh, Gregory, is your father there? I need to talk to him.
        Gregory: Uh, he's upstairs asleep. I think my film sent him into a catatonic state, and I don't mean Arizona.
        Jill: Well, Gregory, did your father stay and watch Mark's film?
        Gregory: Uh huh.
        Jill: Oh no. I feel so terrible. I really wanted to apologize to him.
        Gregory: Oh, for calling him a pompous jackass? Yeah, he was paged a couple of times, so I'm not sure if he saw that part, but, uh, I enjoyed it.

      • Jill: Oh my gosh! That's Dr. Hanover!
        (Tim laughs)
        Tim: Call him "Dr. Comb-over."

      • Brad: I can't believe I have to waste my Friday night watching your stupid video.
        Mark: It's payback for having to watch you kick your stupid soccer ball.
        Tim: Guys, this is what family's all about. You know, doing stuff together that you hate.

      • (Brad is lifting books with his legs)
        Tim: Let me guess: you're reading the footnotes?
        Brad: Yeah, that's very funny. I'm doing physical therapy for soccer. I gotta put some weight on my knees.
        Tim: Did you try standing up?

      • Gregory: I can't masticate in front of strangers.
        Tim: Who can?

      • Mark: (narrating his video) Meet my family. On the surface, we seem normal, but things are not always what they seem. (camera cuts to Brad scratching his behind with a spatula)
        Jill: Ew, Brad, that's disgusting!
        Brad: Wait until you see what I did with the spoon...

      • Mark: Hey, did you get a hold of your professor yet?
        Jill: No, and you know, this never would have happened if you hadn't videotaped me without my permission! Don't you know that's illegal?
        Mark: Yeah, except you did give me permission. I have it on tape.

      • Mark (narrating his film): And these are the Taylors. If they're the typical American family, this country's in trouble.

      • Gregory: There's nothing I enjoy more than playing chess with my father. Except maybe a cerebral hemorrhage.

      • Gregory: They call me a mama's boy! What kind of future do I have?
        Tim: I don't know. How good do you look in flannel?

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