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Andrew Small: Hey! Have you been rolling around naked in poison ivy or something
Brendon Small: Proooobably. Why?
Andrew Small: 'Cause there's an alarming red blotch on your back.
Brendon Small: Oooh. That. No, that's, uh, I call that ... the crab.
Andrew Small: The crab?
Brendon Small: Yeah.
Andrew Small: Well, uh, let's go to the doctor now.
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(Brendon is hiding in a room, Jason and Melissa are at the door)
Brendon: If I come out, you promise not to freak out.
Melissa: (quietly to Jason) I don't want to promise.
Jason: (quietly to Melissa) Just promise. You wanna see this right?
Melissa: (quietly to Jason) Yeah.
(Melissa and Jason cross their fingers behind their backs)
Melissa and Jason: (to Brendon) We promise!
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Coach McGuirk: Let's talk about you, angel-face.
Stephanie: Well, it just so happens that angel-face got a room here. Care to check out the architecture?
Coach McGuirk: Well, let me grab my blueprints.
Stephanie: Good, we'll survey the landscape.
Coach McGuirk: Yeah, and then we'll...cut the lawn...
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(Talking about the rash on Brendon's neck)
Jason: It could be diaper rash, Brendon.
Melissa: On his neck?
Jason: I've seen it in stranger places, Melissa.
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Landstander: I just want to stand on land!
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Walter: Lets get married, Perry!