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Walter & Perry: We all hate Fenton.

Female student: We can't have you at the sleep study program if you're sleeping. McGuirk: Come on 150 bucks! DVD player! (He collapses on the table, asleep) Female and male student: Aww... Female student: He was a good subject. Male student: Yeah. Well...I'd better call the police.

Coach McGuirk: I can't sleep. I have insomnia. Melissa: What's that? McGuirk: You don't know what insomnia is? Melissa: No. McGuirk: It's when you can't sleep. Melissa: Did you try lying on your bed and, you know, just having your eyes closed, and just relaxing? McGuirk: That's genius, Melissa. What a great idea. Let me write that down. So you're saying what I have to do to fall asleep, is go to sleep. Right?! Is that what you're saying, Melissa?! Melissa: (quietly) Mm-hmm. McGuirk: Good! 'Cause it's brilliant!! You should write a book!! You should give seminars, all right! You'll make millions of dollars!! Attention all insomniacs: All you have to do to fall asleep, is lie in your bed!!! Melissa: All right. Coach, I was just trying to help.