Homicide: Life on the Street Season 6 Episode 8

Munch: What's a nice Jewish boy like me doing on his knees in front of the alter of Donna and Blitzen. Christmas isn't even a Christian holiday anymore, it's all about retail.
Lewis: You are so cynical Munch. I mean the reason why we're putting the spit shine on our bar here is so we can get money from the Christmas crowd to celebrate the birth of our saviour. Hopefully, wishing us well in our humble inn and knocking back a few bruskies.
Munch: Your saviour, not mine.

Gwen: (she and John are discussing her mother) Now you're defending her?
Munch: She had you, that makes her okay in my book.

Gwen: (telling Munch his brother Bernie hired a woman to cry and scream at her mother's funeral) He said for another $20, she'd throw herself on the coffin.

Rita Hale: Let me give you some advice, always wear a rubber. (laughs) I sound like a public service announcement. You know they always have those sitcom stars do those, 'you want to be cool? Wear a condom'. They ought to have me do them, get my face up there, a kid will run to the nearest store and blow his allowance on a whole box of condoms.