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Dr. Foreman: Enough! (Chase and Cameron stop and look at Foreman) I take it you two aren't sleeping together anymore? We do what House said. We test for everything.
Dr. Chase: Good. (hands Cameron the file) Then I can go home. (starts to leave)
Dr. Cameron: Since when does we not include you?
Dr. Chase: Well House is going to call us all idiots anyway. Might as well be a well-rested idiot.
-
Dr. Cameron: I'm sorry I mislead you.
Dr. Chase: You didn't. You have feelings for me. You come back to me again and again.
Dr. Cameron: For sex. It's a simple, physical...
Dr. Chase: Come on. You have feelings for puppies and patients you barely even know. But when it comes to a guy that you've worked with for three years. Had sex with, spent the night with. You telling me you feel nothing? Absolutely nothing?
-
Dr. Cuddy: (hands him a file) Restrictive Pericarditis.
House: Boring.
Dr. Cuddy: She's in kindergarten.
House: Less boring... or Grandma's been held back a few years.
-
Dr. Cameron: She's being abused.
Dr. Foreman: A bloody t-shirt doesn't equal abuse. Kids get hurt all the time.
Dr. Chase: That amount of blood?
Dr. Foreman: Oh, crap! You two are agreeing again.
-
Dr. Chase: Letters from school. Fights, detention, a parent conference. Oh, I know, I know. The bad boy is hard to resist.
Dr. Cameron: It's a crush. It's harmless.
Dr. Chase: It's never harmless.
Dr. Cameron: So I'm learning.
-
Dr. Chase: Why'd you take the flower? Why'd you kiss (Jasper)?
Dr. Cameron: He did something sweet.
Dr. Chase: He stole flowers.
Dr. Cameron: He's eight.
Dr. Chase: You were trying to make me jealous.
Dr. Cameron: Yeah, and I want you to profess your love for me. Oh, wait, you already did that and it caused me to end our relationship.
Dr. Chase: You're enabling a thief... and a delinquent.
-
(Chase and Cameron arguing again)
House: Hey! Don't make me turn the hose on you two.
-
Dr. Cameron: We wait and your daughter may die.
House: She does this, your daughter will need hormone replacement therapy for the rest of her life.
Dr. Cameron: The treatments are extremely effective. She should live a relatively normal life.
House: Isn't that every parent's dream? To have a kid to be relatively normal?
-
Dr. Chase: For the record, Cameron was the one that broke it off.
Dr. Foreman: Not interested. (looking at the monitor) No masses in the hypothalamus.
Dr. Chase: I wanted more. She didn't share my feelings.
Dr. Foreman: I feel like I'm in a similar position.
-
Dr. Cameron: If menstruating is a sign of brain cancer, then I should be on chemo right now.
House: That's ridiculous. You're way too skinny to be menstruating.
-
House: A guy gets a little somethin'-somethin' and a couple of kids have to die... it's the circle of life.
-
Dr. Wilson: You! You! You! You were gonna let me do that.
House: You made a compelling argument.
Dr. Wilson: (pause) You sent those flowers to me.
House: Yes, because you took her to a play. And because, actually you do wanna march down there and kiss her.
Dr. Wilson: No, I don't.
House: Yes, you do.
Dr. Wilson: (sighs) You're right...
House: Seriously?
Dr. Wilson: No. You're a jerk. (starts to leave)
House: Night, Wilson.
Dr. Wilson: Night, House.
-
House: (to Cuddy) Stop! The way the soft evening light catches your eyes. The gentle caress of dusk on your hair as you turn around and leave my office without giving me the file.
-
House: You guys are idiots.
Dr. Cameron: Why? Because we stayed up all night doing exactly what you told us to do?
House: No. Because you stayed up all night doing exactly what I told you to do and have nothing to show for it.
Dr. Foreman: We eliminated dozens of wrong anwers.
House: I asked you what two plus two equals, and a day later you tell me, "Not 25."
-
House: Dudes only go to plays if they're dragged there by women they want to see naked.
-
Dr. Cameron: You're intentionally punishing us.
House: By making you do your job? Does seem kinda cruel, doesn't it?
-
House: How late were you out last night?
Dr. Cuddy: It's always the dad, and I don't have a curfew.
House: Panty hamster get a spin on its wheel?!?
-
Dr. Wilson: It is possible to have a friend of the opposite sex.
House: Blasphemer!
-
Dr. Cameron: Can I at least…?
House: "Waste your time"? Wouldn't recognize you if you didn't.
-
(at a day care)
House: Do you have hair on your special place.
Girl: Miss Janie!
-
House: (over the phone) Someone better be dying.
Dr. Cameron: Lucy's brother has a crush on me, so he bit the hell out of Chase.
House: Not interested.
Dr. Chase: Figured you would like to know when one of your employees gets attacked by a sociopath.
House: Bees or monkeys, yes. Sociopaths... no.
-
House: You're trying to have sex with Cuddy.
Dr. Wilson: Fries?
-
Dr. Chase: If he's abusing her he'll never say yes.
House: Never is just "reven" spelled backwards.
-
House: Did you look at her knees? Those knobby things in the middle of her legs.