Season 1 Episode 11


Aired Monday 9:00 PM Feb 15, 2005 on FOX



  • Trivia

    • For this episode only, House's desk has a metal top rather than a glass one. This allows him to ram the pestle into his hand without breaking the desktop.

    • House says he is doing an autopsy on a cat. Technically the animal equivalent of an autopsy is a "necropsy."

  • Quotes

    • Dr. Cuddy: It's not just your leg. You wanna get high. You're doing, what, 80 milligrams a day?
      House: No. That's way too much. Moderation is the key. Unless there's pain.
      Dr. Cuddy: It's double what you were taking when I hired you.
      House: 'Cause you're twice as annoying.

    • Dr. Cuddy: I'll give you a week off clinic duty if you can go a week off narcotics.
      House: No way! I love the clinic.
      Dr. Cuddy: You love the pills. Two weeks.
      House: Pills don't make me high. They make me neutral.
      Dr. Cuddy: A month.
      House: You're on, mister.

    • House: If the artery expands, the clot might move on its own. That's very creative. Why didn't you mention this before?
      Dr. Chase: Well, I... I didn't think of it before.
      House: You should've.

    • Dr. Foreman: I took this job to work with you, not cover your ass. Your Vicodin.
      House: And your solution is to give me drugs. That's interesting.
      Dr. Foreman: No. Now I'm covering my ass. Take your pills before you kill this kid.

    • Dr. Cameron: But there isn't a treatment for Hepatitis E - either he'll get better on his own, or he'll continue to deteriorate.
      House: Yeah, I went to medical school, too.

    • Dr. Cuddy: You know, there are other ways to manage pain.
      House: Like what, laughter? Meditation? Got a guy who can fix my third chakra?

    • Dr. Wilson: You alienate people.
      House: I've been alienating people since I was three.
      Dr. Wilson: Oh, come on! Drop it! You don't think you've changed in the last few years?
      House: Well, of, of course I have. I've gotten older. My hair's gotten thinner. Sometimes I'm bored, sometimes I'm lonely, sometimes I wonder what it all means.

    • House: Of course I've changed!
      Dr. Wilson: And everything's the leg? Nothing's the pills? They haven't done a thing to you?
      House: They let me do my job, and they take away my pain.

    • Dr. Wilson: You learn anything?
      House: Yeah, I'm an addict.
      Dr. Wilson: Uh, okay.

    • House: (waves cane) Chicks dig this - it's better than a puppy!

    • Mr. Foster: What is your problem?
      House: Bum leg - what's yours?

    • Dr. Wilson: (to House) I am here in case you take shots from the clock tower.

    • House: You do that surgery, you'll be killing a mother of four.
      Dr. Cuddy: Father of three.
      House: I was guessing.

    • (after House sneezes on the surgery cloths)
      Anesthesiologist: There's no way we can do this surgery now.
      Dr. Hourani: Ya think!?!

    • (digging up a dead cat)
      Dr. Foreman: Four years of college, four of med school, two years of residency, another four of sub-specialty training. And where do I end up?
      Dr. Chase: Talking instead of digging.

    • Dr. Cameron: Yeah, I I trusted you.
      House: You always trust me. That's a big mistake.

    • House: I take risks - sometimes patients die. But not taking risks causes more patients to die. So I guess my biggest problem is I've been cursed with the ability to do the math.

    • Dr. Cuddy: Answer me.
      House: Nothing I could say is going to change how you feel, and nothing could come out of your reaction that is going to change what I plan to do. So I prefer to say nothing.
      Dr. Cuddy: So...that was you just saying nothing?
      House: Uh-huh.

    • Dr. Foreman: He's detoxing - can't you see he's out of his mind?
      House: That's what they said about Manson.

    • Dr. Foreman: You know, House shouldn't even be here.
      Dr. Chase: Because he said something inappropriate? If we sent him home every time he did that, we wouldn't need this office.

    • House: His liver is shutting down!
      Mr. Foster: What? What does that mean?
      House: It means he's better - he's ready to go home.

    • Dr. Wilson: God, she's beautiful!
      House: Because she's beautiful, I should do it? What kind of pathetic logic is that?!?
      Dr. Wilson: The envious, jealous "I'm married and I can't do anything" logic!

    • Dr. Wilson: She's hot so she's a hooker? What kind of pathetic logic is that?
      House: The envious, jealous "I never got any in high school" logic. Hello?!?

    • House: I had a massage.
      Dr. Chase: Looks like you had a masseuse.

    • House: What are you doing here? I thought we ruled out cancer.
      Dr. Wilson: I was lonely.
      House: Well go see Cuddy – she needs a friend.
      Dr. Wilson: That's funny – she said you might need one.

    • Dr. Cuddy: I can't protect you. Patients talk, doctors talk.
      House: About how big your ass has gotten lately? Not me – I defend it.

    • House: Internal bleeding after a car accident? Wow - that's shocking!

  • Notes

  • Allusions

    • Dr. Wilson: No, I want to make sure you don't start firing shots from the clock tower.
      Refers to Charles Whitman, who on August 1, 1966, climbed to the top of the University of Texas Tower in Austin and began a shooting spree which lasted 96 minutes, killing 10 people and wounding 32 others.