Season 7 Episode 4

Massage Therapy

Aired Monday 9:00 PM Oct 11, 2010 on FOX



  • Trivia

    • Trivia: The game House is playing while lying in bed is the game created by the patient in the season 6 episode "Epic Fail."

  • Quotes

    • House: The principle is she's being irrational. If I give in on this, it sets the stage for the whole relationship.
      Dr. Wilson: Putting up with irrationality is the foundation of every relationship.

    • (to the new fellow)
      House: What's your position on legality of illegal break-ins?
      Dr. Chase: That's more of a second-week type activity.

    • Dr. Chase: Oh, and she's not like Cameron.
      House: True. Cameron had much smaller breasts. By which I mean she was smarter.

    • Dr. Wilson: How are things going with Cuddy?
      House: Great. We've gotten to fifth base. That's two home runs, and then she gives me back a triple.

    • Dr. Wilson: You really like these, or are you just avoiding a touchy conversation?
      House: Nah. This one's too metrosexual. This one's too heterosexual.
      Dr. Wilson: They're identical. Do you even want my input?
      House: No.
      Dr. Wilson: Then why'd you invite me?
      House: Who'd drive my car home if I buy a bike?

    • Taub: Dude, is this about Thirteen?
      Dr. Foreman: No. Why are you calling me "dude"?
      Taub: Maybe it's hard seeing House replace her when you've still got feelings?
      Dr. Foreman: One--I don't have feelings for Thirteen beyond friendship. Two, it's a temporary replacement. And three--dude?
      Taub: It felt right.

    • House: So this time I'm gonna put you at ease. It's just you and old Doc House. A couple of pals chittin' the chat.
      Dr. Chase: Why not just place a chair above a trap door with a shark tank underneath?
      House: Wednesday is when I have my shark tank cleaned.

    • Dr. Foreman: House was wrong trying to come up with a complicated reason you hired Kelly.
      Dr. Chase: Thank you.
      Dr. Foreman: It's actually quite simple. You think she's hot. You want to sleep with her.
      Dr. Chase: Well, it was nice to see you finally taking an interest in my life. We should go bowling sometime.

    • Dr. Cuddy: What? Did you have sex with her?
      House: Yesterday? Ah, you're getting confused by the hooker thing. No, of course not. I'm dating you.
      Dr. Cuddy: But you used to have sex with her.
      House: Well, it was a massage plus happy ending sort of thing. Now it's more of a sad ending. (brightly) Because of you!

    • Dr. Cuddy: What are you doing?
      House: I got bored with the porn on my computer. You got any girl on girl on girl on vibrating object on girl stuff?

    • Dr. Cuddy: Let's stay at my place tonight, okay?
      House: Will you get cable?
      Dr. Cuddy: No.
      House: Then we'll have to have more sex.
      Dr. Cuddy: Okay.

  • Notes

    • Music: Ride Free (Jonny Kaplan and the Lazy Stars), End of the Day (Doug Paisley)

    • On its original premiere, the episode ended with contact information for the National Alliance on Mental Illness.

    • Olivia Wilde is credited but doesn't appear.

    • International Airdates:
      Canada: October 11, 2010 on Global
      Bulgaria: October 15, 2010 on Nova TV
      UK: October 24, 2010 on Sky1
      Australia: October 27, 2010 on Channel Ten
      Germany: April 26, 2011 on RTL
      The Netherlands: August 4, 2011 on SBS 6
      Sweden: September 20, 2011 on TV4
      Czech Republic: September 26, 2011 on TV Nova
      Poland: September 29, 2011 on TVP2
      Slovakia: March 22, 2012 on STV1
      Finland: March 4, 2013 on MTV3

  • Allusions

    • House: Easy Rider auditions ended four decades ago.
      Referencing the 1969 counterculture movie where two hippie bikers, Wyatt and Billy, travel the U.S on their motorcycles looking for freedom. Wyatt's motorcycle has a gas tank decorated like an American flag, like the one that House looks at.

    • House: Dorothy, dear... it's Auntie Em.
      Referencing the famous book series, The Wizard Of Oz, created by Frank L. Baum, that was made into a movie in 1939. In the novel and subsequent movie, Dorothy Gale is literally blown from Kansas to Oz by a tornado. Aunt "Em" (short for Emily) is Dorothy's aunt.