Robin: (to Lily) We made all these arguments, and a sock makes the decision for you?
Ted: I guess that was the sock-out punch, huh, Robin?
Robin: Shut up, Dad!
Ted: You shut up, baby hater!
Robin: Babies are scary, okay? They have giant eyes! And the soft spot? If there's going to be a self destruct button, put it somewhere it won't accidentally get pressed!
Marshall: Baby, it's breakfast time in China. Lily: Yeah, it is! Marshall: Not a euphenism... wait, what would that even mean? Lily: I don't know, hot buns, sour pork, there's something there.
Barney: Why can't there be a day for people who are single and like it that way? Marshall: Well, now you just sound like a chubby girl on Valentine's Day.
Ted: After I got off the phone with Marshall, I was putting your phone back in your purse, and I found something. Robin: I have a permit for that! And the other thing is a gift.
Lily: Marshall and I were going to have "dinner", and I thought I was ready to have "dinner". But now I'm not sure. Am I ready to have "dinner"? Ted: Well, I had a late lunch, so I could wait on dinner. Lily: "Dinner" is a baby. Robin: Lily, that's horrible!
Lily: Ted, you may be single and childless, but you're totally a dorky dad. Ted: I don't think I like your tone, young lady.
Barney: Lily, no part of Barney Stinson does less than 110%. If one of my Michael Phelpses got loose, he's goin' for the gold!
Robin: Anytime you even hear the word kids you get two little lactation stains on your shirt. Ted: Thank God you're not a mom. You are such an ice queen, any baby nursing from you would get brain freeze!
Marshall: (looking inside Barney's 'Not a Fathers Day' card') It appears to be some sort of Asian hooker. Barney: Yes, because on Not a Fathers Day, you get a Thai you'd actually wear! Wordplay five!
Barney: Latest 'Not a fathers day' brainstorm—a pregnancy test, but instead of a little blue line, there's a little blue Barney going like this. (puts his thumbs up)
Barney: God, it's me, Barney. What up? I know we don't talk much, but I know a lot of girls call out your name because of me. Awesome.
The German episode title is "Der Nicht-Vatertag", the French title is "La non-fête des pères", and the Italian title is "La festa del non papà", all exact translations.
International Airdates: Germany: December 19, 2009 on ProSieben; United Kingdom: January 21, 2010 on E4; Czech Republic: November 2, 2010 on Prima COOL
Music: Harry Chapin's "Cat's in the Cradle", sung by Barney
The www.notafathersday.com website Barney mentions exists, redirecting to a section of the Fox shop where episode-themed merchandise can be purchased.
This episode was originally titled "Jeremy's Sock", but was changed before airing.
S 7 : Ep 24
Aired 5/14/12
S 7 : Ep 23
Aired 5/14/12
S 7 : Ep 22
Aired 4/30/12
S 7 : Ep 21
Aired 4/16/12
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