How I Met Your Mother

Season 3 Episode 15

The Chain Of Screaming

Aired Monday 8:00 PM Apr 14, 2008 on CBS

Episode Recap

Older Ted – "Kids, the spring of 2008 was a pretty great time for me. Stella and I had started dating and I'd just gotten a big raise at work, so I decided to purchase something I knew would be the envy of all my friends." Ted buys a car, a Toyota Camry. Barney tells him that it is a stupid idea, but he wants to call shotgun for eternity. Marshall walks up to them and wants a beer desperately. Marshall then tells them that when he started at the law firm, he was so excited about being a lawyer, but then things started to decline. Arthur Hobbs is Marshall's boss and he has a nickname of Artillery Arthur. Mr. Hobbs walks up to Marshall and asks him a question about another employee and when he walks out, he begins yelling at the employee. The next day, Marshall overhears Mr. Hobbs asking where Marshall is and gets ready for the yelling. Marshall tells Lily that he got yelled at work and Lily comforts him, but Barney thinks that he is being a baby. Barney explains that he got screamed at three times at work and once in Korean. Lily continues her comforting and they eventually start making out. Robin tells Marshall that Mr. Hobbs may respect him more now after he yelled at him, but Barney continues the story. Marshall describes what it was like being yelled at and then realizes that he didn't really want the job in the first place. Lily gets a bad feeling and then when Marshall finishes the story, he tells them that he started to cry. Barney reaches over and looks like he is about to comfort him, but just informs him that he has already called shotgun for eternity in Ted's car.

Marshall explains that he doesn't know how to face Mr. Hobbs the next day. Robin suggests that he threatens him with a gun, but Ted comes up with another solution of talking like Abraham Lincoln. Marshall tells Ted that it isn't possible and tells him what he would say to Mr. Hobbs, but he just calls security. Marshall doesn't think that any of these ideas would work, but Barney gives him an example of Gary Blauman and what happened to him during a meeting. A guy yells at him in front of other people, but he interrupts him and tells him to "Kiss my ass!" since his cousin just had a website start up. He then stands on top of the conference table and tries to pee, but he gets performance anxiety and then gives up. Barney tells him that the cousin's website eventually ended, Gary started working as a janitor, and then killed himself. Barney tells Marshall that the moral of the story is to not yell at your boss because there is something called the "chain of screaming" and that it starts at the top. He gives an example of Arthur Hobbs and tells everyone that Arthur's boss's boss screams at Arthur's boss, then on down the chain it goes until it gets to Lily who screams at a student who then screams at her father who turns out to be Arthur's boss' boss. Barney freaks out when Lily explains that she doesn't have any students in her Kindergarten class that have parents that work at Marshall's law firm. Barney freaks out and starts screaming at them, but then stops and reflects on how good he feels. Marshall asks Lily for her advice and she tells him that she teaches her Kindergarten kids that it is important to be constructive and positive. Lily tells him an example of doing this to Mr. Hobbs and it seems like a good idea and he writes down her idea. Older Ted – "But it seemed like that was the end of it, but it wasn't, because the next night…" Lily and Ted are in the apartment looking at carpet samples and Marshall calls Ted and tells him to come downstairs without letting Lily know that it is him. Ted walks outside and finds Marshall stuffing his face.

Marshall and Ted sit in Ted's car and Marshall tells him about what happened at work. He tells Ted that he went down to the diner to work on the Ninja report, but he was interrupted by Barney who tells him that the chain of screaming is real and he has to scream at someone else. Barney suggests that he screams at the waiter, but Marshall doesn't want to scream at him. Marshall takes his advice and then gets yelled at by the waiter. Robin joins them in the car with an ice cream cone and then Barney joins them smoking a cigar. When they all start yelling at each other, Marshall tells them to be quiet and he is in the middle of a story. Marshall continues the story and suggests that he yell at Barney. Marshall has to get revved up and eventually he gets to where he is personally attacking Barney and doing a good job at it. Marshall walks into Mr. Hobbs' office and tells him that he quits and then he gets taken out by security. Marshall is concerned that he doesn't know how to tell Lily, but then everyone is scared by Lily as she knocks on the car window and they all spill their food in Ted's new car. Older Ted – "And so Marshall finally had to tell Lily what happened." Marshall tells her that he wants to go back in the next day and beg for his job back, but Lily tells him that money and the apartment aren't everything and she shouldn't have to be miserable at his job. Older Ted – "Ultimately, they were able to make ends meet without going bust on the apartment." Ted gives Marshall a check and tells him that he has returned the car. Ted asks Marshall if they did it in the car and Marshall tells him yes. Marshall and Lily have sex on the carpet samples to see which one feels better.