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How I Met Your Mother

The Scorpion and the Toad

Season 2, Episode 2, Aired Sep 25, 2006

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8.9

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Barney works with Marshall on his bachelor skills, which include hitting on women. Lily is back from her venture. Robin helps her look for a new apartment but gets sick of hearing about San Francisco.

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Cast & Crew

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GUEST STAR
Josh Wingate

Mike
GUEST STAR
Richard Wharton

Art Professor
GUEST STAR
Lara Boyd Rhodes

Amy

Neil Patrick Harris

Barney Stinson
Josh Radnor

Ted Mosby
Jason Segel

Marshall Eriksen
Cobie Smulders

Robin Scherbatsky
Alyson Hannigan

Lily Aldrin

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Fan Episode Reviews (7)

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Barney repeatedly steals Marshall's women and Lily lies about her time in San Fran.

7.5

"Good"

By pudgebyrd722, Apr 30, 2012

Lily surprises Robin and Ted as she comes home. She tells of her "good times" in San Francisco but Ted sees right through her and bets Robin that it's all a bunch of bull, a bet he ends up winning. However, he consoles her by saying Marshall would take her back in a heartbeat, which sadly, he doesn't, thinking they would be better apart at that time. Meanwhile before that, Barney repeatedly takes Marshall out, scouting for women, but each times Barney takes home the women himself, angering Marshall. He even takes both twins they were on double dates with! Now I love Marshall and Lily together, but Barney was pissing me off in this episode because I'm also mad at Lily for leaving Marshall, so I wanted him to drum up some kind of short relationship to make Lily feel even more bad for being selfish. But however, still a good, enjoyable episode.moreless
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Lily returns and Barney tries to help Marshall get over Lily.

8.0

"Great"

By Jon_MW_14, Aug 16, 2011

"The Scorpion and the Toad" is good How I Met Your Mother episode. I love how Lily officially returns in this episode. I love how Lily makes all these amazing stories about San Fransisco but then after drinking Tequila and finding out she didn't get the apartment, she breaks down crying and saying she's miserable. I love how Lily apologizes to Marshall in this episode. The only thing I didn't like about this episode was Barney. He says he's trying to help Marshall get over Lily, but he always takes the women that he tries to set up with Marshall. I give this episode 8/10.moreless
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Kinda Ok.

8.2

"Great"

By sweet_em, May 04, 2011

I didn't think this was the best episode ever. In fact I don't even know if I laughed very much,which is never a good sign.
1)I'm so glad that Lily's back, although the darker hair is a little offputting, she needs her red back.
2) The whole thing with Marshall and Barney and the stealing of the girls was boring and not that funny at all. OK we get it, what's sad was that Marshall was not getting it.
3) The best part was when they showed how Lily was actually thinking Marshall Marshall Marshall every time she talked about how great San Francisco was. Because it's totally true-that's how girl brains work, I can't deny it at all.
I'll keep watching cuz there isn't anything else on I want to watch Mondays at 8:30 but I hope they get back into the swing of things soon.moreless
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Why did Lily backstab Barney? In episode 19 of this season it is revealed that Barney went to California and asked Lily to come back, he was only stealing Marshall's date because he wanted Marshall and Lily to be back together.moreless

5.5

"Mediocre"

By ipodhifi, May 04, 2011

Why did Lily backstab Barney? In episode 19 of this season it is revealed that Barney went to San Francisco and asked Lily to come back, he was only stealing Marshall's date because he wanted Marshall and Lily to be back together.

Why does Robin have a bad ass day? Did Marshall let Barney steal his girls? Why do they show Lily as miserable without Marshall? Why is Lilly always showing weird faces when she talks? Is Ted the biggest idiot in the show? Robin has cute breasts and can be fun either drunk or sober. all in all a boring episode but significant for "Marshmallow" and "Lilypad". Barney and Robin are the real show runners.moreless
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Lilly returns.

9.7

"Superb"

By Canogaparkcindy, Apr 21, 2010

This is definitely one of my favorite How I Met Your Mother episodes by far. Definitely an eventful episode since Lilly returns. Apparently, she's had the best experience of her life over the summer. Ted & Robin try to find out if she misses Marshall. Ted bets 5 dollars that she is miserable, and Robin bets 5 bucks that she isn't. Meanwhile Barney introduces Marshall to the single life. Barney ends up stealing Marshall's date on every occasion. At first I thought it was great that Lilly was back but like Ted, I hated the fact that she wasn't miserable. Ted & Robin get Lilly drunk so her true feelings can come out, and it turns out she had a miserable summer. Finding out how her "real summer" went was hysterical. Also the whole scene with Lilly wanting to know about Marshall. The morning after, drunk Robin was hilarious! I thought Barney was such a jerk to Marshall in this episode, if anything he was helping Marshall digress from moving on. The big moment is when Marshall sees Lilly. Lilly asks Marshall to take her back. Marshall says no, which is definitely good iin my opinion. Lilly needs to really learn her lesson for what she did to Marshall. I loved Marshal's revenge on Barney. "You gave me chlamydia, you jerk!" "You gave me & my twin chlamydia, you jerk!" Hilarious. A great follow up episode to the Lilly storyline.moreless
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Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions

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TRIVIA (2)
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- Goof: In "World's Greatest Couple" Robin says that Lily is allergic to dogs, but Lily spends time in Robin's apartment near two dogs in this episode and does not seem bothered.
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- Goof: Halfway through the episode, Lily gets a phone call about the house she's interested in. This scene was shot at least twice, because every time the camera perspective changes, the dog moves from the floor to the chair, or back.
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QUOTES (11)
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- Barney: Come on! I'll, I'll teach you all of my strategies
  Marshall: Oh, really?
  Barney: My favorite, number seven: Create a mystery about yourself. That way, they become so intrigued, they have to hang out with you all night.
  Mashall: Oh, come on, does that really work?
  Barney: Maybe it does, and maybe it doesn't.
  Marshall: Damn it, that's intriguing. Okay, I'm in.
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- Old Ted: When it comes to hangover, everyone has their own way of dealing with it. Waiter: Hi, there! What can I get you? Lily: I'll have the dirtiest, greasiest tuna melt you got. And a milkshake. Ted: Gravy. Waiter: You want that gravy on anything? Ted: Surprise me. Robin: I'd take you with gravy if my boyfriend wasn't sitting right here! Whoo! Lily: What's wrong with her? Ted: She's still a little drunk.
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- Barney: Tonight we'll go the The Scorpion and the Toad, a college bar. I figure in a college environment, you'll seem more mature. More worldly. And as a law student, more smarter.
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- Marshall: You said to me that being single would be like being in a candy store. Barney: Well, it's not like a candy store; it's a lawless post-apocalyptic wasteland.
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- Ted: [Lily]'s moved on? Robin: Well, it happens. I've fallen out of love faster than that before. Sometimes—boom!—with no warning what so ever. One day we in love, the next day he's dead to me. (Ted looks at Robin with sad eyes) Robin: But we're great… Honey.
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- Marshall: I did it. I got a girl's phone number. Oh, and her hand writing is so cute, look. (hands the phone number to Barney) Marshall: Oh, I'm going to take her out for Chinese food, and maybe we'll take a walk though the park. It will be so… what? Barney: Sorry, buddy, I'm taking this one, too. (Anger builds up in Marshall's face) Marshall: I'll kill you!
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- Barney: Dude! You were awesome last night! You were charming, you were funny, you were totally working that girl!
  Marshall: You went home with her!
  Barney: Yes I did...
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- Ted: Five bucks says she still wants Marshall. Robin: You're on. Ted: Five American bucks. Robin: Dammit!
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- (What Lily claimed happened.) Art professor: Oh my God. This is your best work! In all my years teaching I have never seen anything so... Needless to say, this is art! I can't teach you anything. (Gives Lily his paintbrush) (What actually happened.) Art professor: Oh my God. This is your best work? In all my years teaching I have never seen anything so…needless! To say this is…art. I can't teach you anything.(Takes away Lily's paintbrush)
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- Ted: Okay, we're way past 'truth-telling' Lily and about to hit 'Cinco de Mayo 1998' Lily, and I'm not cleaning that up again.
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- Ted: She's miserable. She's realized that she's made a huge mistake. Her and Marshall will be back in a week. I love it!! Robin: Um. No. You just want Lily to be miserable. The truth is she's happy. Ted: Trust me. I've known Lily for 9 years. Robin: Trust me! I'm a girl! Ted: Yeah, but you're Canadian.
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NOTES (3)
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- The German episode title is "Neues Leben, alte Fehler", meaning "New Life, Old Mistakes". The French title is "La drague selon Barney", meaning "Picking Up According to Barney". The Italian title is "Il rospo e lo scorpione", an exact translation.
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- International Airdates: Czech Republic: January 6, 2010 on Prima COOL
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- Music Featured In This Episode: "It was Love" by The Elected
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ALLUSIONS (1)
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- Episode Title: "The Scorpion and The Toad" The Scorpion and The Toad is a childrens fable: The Scorpion asks the Toad, "Hey, can you give me a lift across the pond?" The Toad says, "No, 'cause you'll sting me and I'll die." The Scorpion says, "No I won't, 'cause then we'll both drown." So the Toad says, "cool," and the Scorpion hops on its back. Halfway across the pond, the Scorpion stings the Toad. As they're going down, the Toad says, "Why? Now we'll both die," and the Scorpion says, "Because it's in my nature."
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