How I Met Your Mother

Barney: Sweden thinks they're so cool. (in a French accent) Oh, we are Swedish! With our croissants and our baguettes and our Eiffel Tower!
Marshall: Dude, Sweden's not France. You know that, right?
Barney: Oh, it's right.

Barney: What is your firm currently designing?
Ted: The new York public library.
Robin: Ted, that's amazing!
Ted: No, it's the new public library in York, North Dakota. Their books are in two categories: fishin' and non fishin'.

Marshall: Hey, you wanna go to the current GNB building and pee on it a little? Ted: Yeah, I think I need that.

Jillian: Guys, the most embarrassing thing just happened. My boob accidentally fell out of my shirt—psyche! I whipped it out for a free drink! Girls: Woooo! Robin: So, Jillian, I hear when you're not flashing bartenders you teach the second grade. What's that like?

Barney: The world absolutely needs Woooo girls. If there were no Woo girls, there would be no Girls Gone Wild, no bachelorette parties, no Las Vegas poolside bars. All the things that you hold dearest, Lily, would be gone. Lily: Those are not the things… Barney: The souvenir shot glass industry would collapse. So would the body glitter industry... and the stretch Hummer limo industry. Tiny cowboy hats would only be worn by tiny cowboys. And when "Brown Eyed Girl" would come up on the jukebox, all you would hear would be silence... and "Brown Eyed Girl". But who would woo? Would you? Would you... woo?

Robin: Look, Lily, you're married, but I'm still single. I'm usually the third wheel to you and Marshall, and sometimes it's nice to go out with single women and do single women things. Lily: Like what? Robin: Like woo, Lily. Like woo. Lily: Hey, I can woo. Robin: That's not true. Lily: I could too. Robin: It's just not you.

Marshall: I love this! Drinking at work. Barney: We're basically mad men. Marshall: We are so Mad Men! Barney: I'm going to go slap a secretary on the ass. Marshall: Yes! That's exactly what they would do on that show! Barney: What show?

Lily: We saw you woo. Robin: Saw who woo? Lily: Saw you woo. Robin: I didn't woo. Lily: You did too. Robin: That's not true. Lily: Your nose just grew.

Robin: I love Marshall, but he's always 'talkblocking' me.

Lily: Oh, my God, Bitch, this is our anthem! Robin: Really, who sings this? Lily: Is LL Cool J still doing things?

Barney: (speaking to the board) So it's agreed, all ATM fees are now called 'Freedom Charges'.