I Love Lucy

Season 3 Episode 23

Lucy Writes a Novel

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Aired Monday 9:00 PM Apr 05, 1954 on CBS
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Episode Summary

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Lucy writes a novel in which the characters are thinly-veiled caricatures of Ricky, Fred and Ethel. Too thinly veiled, Ricky, Fred and Ethel think. So they burn it. But not before Lucy gets a copy to a publisher.

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    • TRIVIA (0)

    • QUOTES (8)

      • Ethel: (reading from Lucy's novel) "The best thing about Fred was that, when you met him, you understood why Ethel was like she was."
        Fred: What does that mean?
        Ethel: I don't know, but I'll bet it's insulting.

      • Lucy: Well, the three little snoopers! I trust you didn't have too much trouble finding it?
        Ricky: It wasn't easy. First of all, we had to make ourselves think the way you do. That was an accomplishment in itself.

      • Ricky: Nothing personal, dear, but we're suing you for libel.
        Lucy: You're suing me?
        Ricky: For every cent I've got!

      • Ethel: (after Lucy tries to convince everyone about the profit they stand to make from her novel) I still say sue 'er! Sue 'er!
        Lucy: Oh, 'sue 'er,''sue 'er!' Get your mind out of the gutter!

      • Ethel: What are you gonna write about?
        Lucy: I'm writing about things I know.
        Ethel: That won't be a novel. That'll be a short story.
        Lucy: One more remark like that and I'll kill you off in Chapter One!

      • Lucy: (holding back tears after her book has been rejected) I'm not sad for myself; I'm sad for the world. Mankind will never benefit from these immortal pages. Too bad, world. Too bad, mankind. (ripping up her novel) You'll get no more books from me, so go watch television!

      • Mr. Eaton: (on the phone with Lucy) I'd like very much to print portions of it in a textbook I'm preparing on how to write a novel.
        Lucy: Oh... (to Ricky, Fred, and Ethel) He wants to print portions of it in a textbook on how to write a novel. Go on, Mr. Eaton.
        Mr. Eaton: Well, I wish Mr. Dorance had mentioned this to you, but... it'll head up the chapter entitled "Don't Let This Happen To You."
        (pause)
        Lucy: It's going to head up the chapter entitled "Don't Let This Happen To You."

      • Lucy: My novel may become another Gone With The Wind.

    • NOTES (1)

      • This episode opens with the Philip Morris box and the star credits crawl with the animated Desi pulling up the heart title. This opening would be used until Episode 96.

    • ALLUSIONS (0)

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