I Love Lucy Season 1 Episode 12

(Jean is surprised that Ricky didn't react like all American men.)
Ricky: American men, eh? I guess I fooled you with my Brooklyn accent.

Ricky: What do you mean, you came here...?
Jean: Please, please, this is no time to argue. If we stay here much longer, her stupid husband will return and find us here.
Lucy: Watch what you're saying! (points at Ricky) He is my stupid husband. (stutters) He's my husband.

Lucy: There's just two things keeping me from dancing in that show.
Fred: Your feet?

Jean: Why are American women so stubborn?
Lucy: Why are French men so amorous?
Jean: I don't know, just fortunate I guess.

Lucy: Ricky, what are you doing here?
Ricky: I live here, remember?

Lucy (on learning Fred is going to be her dance partner): I suppose a fat Apache is better than none.

Lucy: Oh Ethel, did you ever wish there was something else to marry besides men?

(Lucy and Ethel come back from fixing their makeup.)
Fred: Same old one. (uncrosses his fingers)
Ricky: Same old one here too.
Ethel: What are they talking about?
Lucy: I don't know but whatever it is, ours aren't young enough.

Ricky: If Lucy doesn't have any lipstick on, she thinks she's nekkid.
Fred: Nekkid?
Ricky: Yeah, you know not wearing a thin.
Fred: A thin what?
Ricky: Clothes, clothes!
Fred: Nekkid - not wearing no thin clothes.

Fred: Ethel keeps going out to put on a new face, but she always comes back with the old one.