I Love Lucy Season 1 Episode 19

Ricky: By the way, what was the terrible accident on the streetcar?
Fred: (laughing) Wouldn't you like to know!
Ricky: No.
Fred: Well, I'll tell you anyway. But remember, this is my best gag and you gotta promise not to use it.
Ricky: OK, I promise. What was the terrible accident on the streetcar, Fred?
Fred: Well, a man had his eye on a seat and a woman sat on it. (Ricky looks away in disdain while Fred laughs) What a pipperoo! Remember now, you promised not to use it.
Ricky: That's one promise I will never break.

Burlesque Comic: (to Lucy) Say, you're a nice looking fella.

Madame Lemond: I think we should go to the barre.
Lucy: Oh good, cause I'm awful thirsty.

Lucy: I'm going to get in that show if it's the last thing I do.
Ethel: Lucy, you're too young to die.

Lucy: Here I am with all this talent bottled up inside of me, and you're always sitting on the cork.

Lucy: (after her ballet dance) Well?
Ricky: (to Lucy) Well, you'll do for the comic, but who am I gonna get for the ballet dancer?

Ricky: (speaking about Lucy) What am I going to do about her?
Fred: Have you ever thought of putting her in a large basket and leaving her on somebody's doorstep?
Ricky: That wouldn't work. She's too smart. She'd find her way home.

Lucy: I was in a dance recital in high school, The Dance of The Flowers.
Fred: She has got nice stems.
Lucy: Thank you. I was the only petunia that did a solo.