Dan Frischman says he doesn't think any other movies besides Predator can claim to star two future governors (Arnold Schwarzenegger and Jessse Ventura), forgetting that they also appeared together that same year in The Running Man. They also were both in 1997's Batman & Robin.
Greg Fitzsimmons: A minister with the first name Oral. That's like a prisoner with the first name Anal.
Rachael Harris: Lee Press On Nails are really good for, like, workin' it (pantomimes giving a hand job) You know what I mean? 'Cause it looks like 'ew, nasty!'
Hal Sparks: (on Predator) He looks like a toothed vagina.
Dee Snider: (on The Legend of Zelda) I got to level 7. I was there. I could taste it. I was gonna get the princess, man! And one of my ____in' kids kicked out the plug.
Tom Papa: (on Throw Momma from the Train) It's like if your angry gym teacher had sex with a Shar-Pei. That was momma.
Loni Love: (on Baby Jessica) You know you got a damned well outside. Watch the baby!
John Aboud: [Mannequin]'s kind of like a Twilight Zone gone really wrong...
Michael Colton: ...or really right.
Bil Dwyer: People just thought you could pop an egg in [the microwave] and, bam, you'd cook it.
Rachael Harris: As if it wasn't easy enough just to do it on the ____in' stove.
Bil Dwyer: No, boom.
Willie Garson: If you do it right, almost anything can burst into flame.
Jason George: (on Max Headroom) It was like a computer with Tourette's.
Michael Ian Black: Say you've got a baked potato. In the old days, nine weeks, minimum. Microwave? (snaps fingers) Done!
Adam Ferrara: [The stock market] fell how much?! (pretends to snort cocaine) It will come back, right?
Larry Joe Campbell: (on "Black Monday") I remember it didn't mean a damn thing to me, 'cause we didn't have any money. So who cared?
Alonzo Bodden: Hawk would say three words, pull out a gun bigger than your head, and kill you with it. If it wasn't for Hawk, Spenser would have lived two episodes.
Chris Booker: (on Lethal Weapon) Wherever Mel Gibson would go, someone would end up dying.
Chris Jericho: (on Billy Idol's "Mony, Mony") To this day, when you hear it, there are 45-year-old uncles at weddings yelling, "get laid, get ____ed!"
During the segment on the microwave oven, Joel Stein describes how putting a marshmallow in one would yield something like the Stay Puft man, an enemy during the climax to Ivan Reitman's 1984 film Ghostbusters.
While talking about Star Trek: The Next Generation's Wesley Crusher, the guys from Modern Humorist call him, "the Doogie Howser of space navigation," comparing Wesley's advanced skills during adolescence to the similar combination in the title character from Doogie Howser, MD.