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Karma - Season 3
"All I Want Is You" is a song by U2.
In this episode it is revealed that Spiederman lives with his uncle because of his parents brutal custody battle.
Snippets of the featured song,"Where Does It Hurt", can be heard in different episodes throughout the season.
Jude: Sadie, you know me better than anyone. What do I do? How can I possibly pick?
Sadie: You choose what's in your heart, and you know who that is.
Spiederman: You come to collect what's left of my dignity?
Karma: I came to apologize.
Spiederman: Well how are you possibly going to make up for this one Karma? I mean, knew you were manipulative, but this-
Karma: Is crazy, even for me. That's why I think we should give this marriage thing a shot for real.
Spiederman: Look, I just graduated high school like this week.
Karma: So what? Romeo and Juliet did it at fourteen. We're in love, right?
Spiederman: Well yeah, I think we are.
Jude: Who knew freedom could be so exhilarating and scary?!
Jamie: It doesn't have to be. I've been not so secretly resentful of your fame for years because I thought it kept you away from me.
Jude: I don't wanna be away from you.
Jamie: I don't you to have to give up the things that make you extraordinary, that make me love you.
Jude: It's still me Jamie, but without my music.
Jamie: It doesn't have to be. Paegan and I are starting our own record label.
Jude: What? Jamie!
Jamie: I want you to be our first producer.
Jude: That's incredible! But I technically still have a contract with G-Major.
Jamie: Just think about it.
Paegan: She's having a right cracking day, and so is your pal Paegan. Just signed the payments and it seems I don't have to give up as much of me royalties as I feared.
Jamie: Congrats. It must be nice having a few extra bucks in your pocket.
Paegan: A few million bucks. And I'm going to use them to partner with the most naturally gifted talent enhancer I've ever had the pleasure of meeting.
Jamie: What are you saying?
Paegan: I'm starting an independent record label, and you're going to run it.
Spiederman: Relax my sweet. Seems like your publicity stunt was a revolting success.
Karma: People actually think we're married which is funny, because we are.
Spiederman: Good one dude. If I had been drinking something there, it probably would of come out my nose.
Karma: Turns out Paegan is actually ordained and got a marriage license and everything. Oopsy doodles?
Spiederman: We're married?
Karma: I didn't know. Good news, Brittney Spears' annulment got twice the press her wedding did.
Spiederman: I don't want an annulment!
Karma: Speedy it was an honest mistake.
Spiederman: I know about mistakes. When I was ten years old my parents had a brutal divorce. The custody fight was so bad that I had to move in with my uncle.
Karma: You did?
Spiederman: Yeah, so I promised myself that when I got married, it would be for keeps no matter what.
Karma: I didn't know about your parents, any of it.
Spiederman: Why would you? It has nothing to do with your quest for fame. I mean why would my own wife know anything about me?
Jamie: There's gotta be another way.
Jude: Ok where can we possibly stage a free largely illegal underground concert?
Jamie: Way above ground.
Karma: Really? A tuxedo t-shirt?
Spiederman: Wanna remind me again why I'm going through with this fake wedding?
Karma: Three words. Fake honeymoon loving.
Paegan: In my experience, record contracts don't get better with a good stare. But maybe you'll have better luck.
Jude: Luck? G-Major wants to sell my music. Past, present, all of it. I don't own a note.
Paegan: Jude, sweetheart, I'm so sorry. If it's any consolation, I've always believed that music is actually owned by the people who love it.
Jude: How very twenty first century of you.
Paegan: That's why you have to get music out to the fans, to the people. If you give it out for free...
Jude: It's worthless to whoever wants to exploit it!
Tommy: Have you heard about G-Major's finances?
Jude: I heard that Darius is being audited.
Tommy: Well it must not be going so well because he's selling off the company's assets, including you.
Jude: What are you talking about?
Tommy: He put your entire catalog on the auction block.
Jude: All my music is for sale?
Tommy: To the highest bidder, used as they see fit. Dance remixes, commercials, whatever.
Jude: Sorry I made us bail.
Jamie: No problem. Now that our milkshake levels are sufficient, wanna tell me what's up? Like really up?
Jude: I don't wanna hurt you Jamie.
Jamie: So don't.
Jude: From Patsy, from Portia, to Tommy, this year my instincts have just been off. My heart is telling me to go for it, but what if my heart's just a big liar?
Jamie kisses her
Jamie: What does your heart tell you now?
Jude: I can't tell, my lips won't shut up.
Spiederman: How did your corsage end up in the garbage?
Karma: Oh Speedy I do!
Paegan: Speaking of dating, the paparazzi loves love. They go completely bonkers for a celebrity wedding.
Karma: They do, don't they?
Paegan: I've got a mate with a quickie chapel and I would be happy to perform the ceremony.
Karma: A scandalous fake wedding. It's genius!
Paegan: What are you doing Love?
Karma: I'm trying to come up with a radical publicity stunt to put the spotlight back on yours truly.
Paegan: Well back in the day unfortunate PR disasters were my specialty. You try biting the head off a rodent?
Karma: Not lately.
Paegan: Red carpet nipple slippage?
Karma: Jude already pulled that one.
Paegan: Adopt an inner child.
Karma: Kinda. Have you seen who I'm dating?
Girl: I'm sorry to interrupt, but would you sign this?
Karma: Anything for a fan!
Girl: Yeah, I thought your cartwheels were top notch. You're Kimberly, right, from remedial gym class?
Jamie: So this is high school Prom?
Jude: I didn't realize there'd be so much girl on girl grinding.
Jamie: Stripper chic, it's all the rage.
Jude: Well if this is normal...
Jamie: Heaven help us all?
Jude: I was gonna say I'm glad we're the freaks.
Jude: What do we do now?
Jamie: Do normal teenage things. Prom hop!
Jamie: I hope they get the giant rat that's in charge.
Sadie: They did, the G-Major board that is. Seemed they weren't too impressed to discover that their president had covered up his sister's attempt at murder.
Jamie: And to think accessory to murder isn't Darius' worst trait.
Sadie: Long story short, they're auditing his books. So all employees of G-Major are suspended indefinitely.
Kwest: I still had a half a meatball sub in the fridge.
Spiederman: Dude, that sucks!
Jude and Jamie are kissing when Tommy shows up.
Jude: Oh, this can't be good.
Tommy: So are you going to invite me in?
Jude: Ah . . God.
Jamie: Here to wish us luck?
Jude: Ok relax, relax it isn't what it looks like . . . ok, so what, maybe it is what it looks like.
Tommy: Oh, we can discuss you and pencil-neck later.
Jude: (referring to Jamie) He's a cutie.
Spied: So don't do this to him
Jude: Do what?
Spied: Make him your second choice guy – again. Dude's been your rebound guy so many times he's going to get whiplash.
Jude: It's not like that.
Spied: Jude, you and I used to go out. I know what's going on. I always knew you only had room in your heart for one dude, and that's Lord Squinty Frown. Come on, you know I'm right, but what do you got to lose, huh? Except your best friend. . .
Jude: (voiceover) Making choices has never been my strong suit . . .
Sadie: Acapulco has incredible Ecolodges.
Jude: Yeah, and Cancun has drunk girls losing their bikini tops. You're so lucky you and Kwest are going on vacation together.
Sadie: Why, you craving a little beach time with Jamie or Tommy?
Jude: Nice try but I'm not playing. (voiceover) Only because I'm too terrified to pick.
Sadie: Oh, Jamie certainly has transformed from lost puppy dog to full-on stallion.
Jude: (voiceover) Oh, I've noticed . . . A stallion's a horse.
Sadie: . . Then there's Tommy: those lips, those eyes. Bad boy will always be a contender
Jude: (voiceover) It's the always that worries me. Tommy-a-do, Tommy-ah-do, I mean you know, Jude's neglected her third album for too long. Romance is just going to have to wait till G Major is finished with me.
They walk into G Major where everything is being taken away by the cops
Jude: Hey, what's going on here?
Man: I'm sorry ladies, until further notice G Major is closed for business.
Jude: (voice over) Only thing worse than not being able to make a decision . . .
Sadie: Looks pretty finished to me
Jude: (voiceover) . . . is having the big ones made for you . . .
Jude: So, now that G Major's closed, what are you gonna do with your life?
Tommy: I was thinking about trying all things I didn't get to do, like backpacking through Asia. I fly to Thailand in 2 days
Jude: You're leaving? You deserve a fresh start
Tommy: We both do. I want you to come with me. I want all of you with me forever.
Jude: Oh, my god
Tommy: And I don't care if you're herding goats or waiting tables or making music. I just want you to be happy. And um... now you can be, as the sole owner of your own music catalogue
Jude: What? You got this from Darius? Tommy, what did you have to do?
Tommy: Doesn't matter. I would do anything for you... because I love you
In the States on The-N, this episode aired on May 18, 2007.
Featured song: "Where Does It Hurt" by Alexz Johnson.
Jude's rooftop performance is an homage to the Beatles' final performance which took place atop of their Apple Headquarters.
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