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It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia

Mac and Dennis: Manhunters

Season 4, Episode 1, Aired Sep 18, 2008

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Quotes
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- Charlie: Monkeys are like nature's humans.
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- Mac: You put your balls in my mouth while I was sleeping? Dennis: Yeah, man, twice. Mac: That's rape. Dennis: Yeah, I know. Mac: That is borderline rape.
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- Dee: Oh, Charlie, oh, I wanted to eat that lady so bad. Charlie: I did, too. I did, too.
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- Charlie: Cannibalism? Racism, Dee? Th--That's not for us. You know, those are the decision that are best left to the suits in Washington, okay? We're just here to eat some dude.
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- Dennis: (to Cricket) It's just you and us and a couple pairs of sour sweaty balls.
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- Dennis: I'm so excited-- feel my nips. Mac: Holy smokes! Dennis: They're, like, super hard, right? Mac: Whoo! You could cut glass with these bad boys.
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- Dennis: I'm sticking with the tea-bagging. Mac: But tea-bagging doesn't even leave a mark! Dennis: Well, fine, I'll dip my nuts in ink or something and then put it in his mouth-- that make you happy? Mac: Well... Yeah, actually, I think that's a pretty good idea.
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- Dennis: Yeah, but where are we supposed to get that many pubes, man? Mac: We shave. Dennis: Well, that's gonna be a problem-- I laser. It's like a turtle shell down there. Mac: What?
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- Mac: Hunting is awesome, Dennis! Dennis: Yeah. Mac: You get to wear sweet clothes and get wasted all day. Dennis: It's just like our normal lives, except at the end of it we get to put our nuts in some dude's mouth.
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- Dee: I don't think I can eat this guy. Charlie: No, I don't think I can, right? What is that? Dee: I don't... I don't know. Charlie: It's not because he's black, though, right?
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- Frank: What is it with you people? I mean, you guys are always touching each other's nipples, putting your balls in each other's mouths. (Mac starts laughing) Dennis: Yeah, it's fun. Mac: It's funny.
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- Charlie: Dee and I cooked up a great steak. Frank's got, like, this whole fridge full of these delicious meats that I've been stealing. And you guys want to try some of this? Dennis: Someone who sweats as much as you should not work with food.
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- Dennis: I think that hunting a man would be the only true test of a good hunter. Frank: Oh, yeah? I was hunted once. I just came back from Nam. I was hitching through Oregon and some cop started harassing me. Next thing you know, I had a whole army of cops chasing me through the woods. I had to take 'em all out. It was a bloodbath. Charlie: That's Rambo, dude.
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- Charlie: Like, you get one taste of delicious, delicious human meat, none of this stuff ever satisfies you ever again for the rest of your life. Dee: 'Kay, now I think that you're overreacting, okay? Charlie: Oh, really? Dee: Yeah. That's stupid. Charlie: Is that stupid?! Oh, I'm sorry, Dee. Well, then I guess Jaws IV is stupid.
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- Dee: Mac, grab us some beers. Mac: Bite my bird.
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- Charlie: I ate (beep) monkey, Dee!
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Notes
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- Original International Air Dates:
  Slovakia: December 2, 2011 on JOJ Plus
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Allusions
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- Charlie: That's Rambo, dude. As Charlie and the rest of the guys point pointed out, Frank was describing his life in the way of the fictional character, John Rambo. Believing the events of the 1982 film First Blood happened to him.
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