It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia

Frank: Everybody who's in favor of firing Mac as campaign manager, raise their hand. (everyone raises their hand) The people have spoken, you're out. Mac: So that's it? That's it. I'm fired? This is bullshit! Frank: It's politics, man.

Mac: We are getting blasted in the ass by the state liquor tax. Dee: Blasted in the ass? Dennis: Mac, we have the same conversation every year. There's nothing you can do about taxes. Dee: Uh, you guys might want to think about voting every once in a while.

Dee: Are those--those stupid cards where babies are doing disgusting things? Charlie: Uhhh... no. They're the amazing cards where babies are doing hysterical things!

Frank: (to Dennis) You look like a dick in that tiny jacket.

Dennis: I think you might be dyslexic. Charlie: Read the script once. Dennis: Okay, you want me to read the script? Charlie: Yes. Dennis: All right. Charlie: And... action Dennis: I'll read the words you wrote. "Hello, fellow American. This you should vote me. I leave power good. Thank you. Thank you. If you vote me, I'm hot..." What? "Taxes, they'll be lower... son. The democratic vote for me is right thing to do, Philadelphia, so do."

(Frank and Mac's political smear ad against Dennis) Mac: (voice-over) "When Dennis Reynolds was a counselor at Camp Cumberland, he was sent home for the statutory rape of a teenage camper. A vote for Dennis Reynolds is a vote for underage rape. Dennis Reynolds, baby rapist. Don't let him rape you, Philadelphia."

Jack: Are you trying to solicit a bribe from me? Frank: I don't know, am I? Jack: Because if you are, not only is that illegal and highly unethical, but you're doing it with the subtlety of a baboon.

Dennis: Am I supposed to vote for the Democrat who's going to blast me in the a** or the Republican who's blasting my a**? Mac: See politics is all just one big a**-blast. Dennis: It's a coast to coast,... Charlie: You're going to get you're a**-blasted. Dennis: ...nationwide a**-blasting.

Dennis: What's the note say? Charlie: All right, yeah. All right, uh, "meet." It starts out "meet" and then there's, like, other stuff. Dennis: "Meet me in the parking garage, Frank." Charlie: Yeah? Dennis: Yeah. You clearly have a learning disability, dude.

Mac: Gentlemen, sorry we couldn't work anything out, but I gotta go home and pay my taxes.

Frank: There is nothing more threatening to a man than a woman who is smart and attractive. We have to pretend you're both. Dee: Wow, you're a horrible father.

Mac: You are going to hell, little man! Charlie: Hmm... I don't think so. That's politics, b***h!

Frank: I mean, you have to be a real, low-life piece of s**t to get involved in politics.

Mac: Let me take you b****es to school for a second.