It's Like, You Know...

Season 1 Episode 1

Welcome to L.A.

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Aired Unknown Mar 24, 1999 on ABC
8.4
out of 10
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3 votes
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Episode Summary

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Welcome to L.A.
AIRED:
"L.A.-hating Arthur is a New York journalist who wouldn't be caught dead in Tinsel town if he wasn't writing a book about it and in need of some firsthand research. Of course, his phobia regarding Los Angeles is always in some degree of conflict with his fascination with the city where nothing is what it seems and dreams can come true. In the premiere episode, the series pilot, Arthur moves in with Robbie and proceeds to feed his feelings of antipathy for Los Angeles and channel them into his forthcoming book. He gets his first journal entry when neighbor Jennifer Grey gives him a pastrami sandwich -- with mayo. Meanwhile, Robbie becomes a local folk hero when his broken car horn prevents him from doing what all Angelenos do -- honking obnoxiously at another driver for some perceived offense. (ABC)moreless

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SUBMIT REVIEW

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    • TRIVIA (0)

    • QUOTES (9)

      • Lou: Listen. I first came here for five days to write an article about Los Angeles for the Atlantic Monthly.
        Arthur: Oh, you know the managing editor there?
        Lou: No, I don't! That was twenty-eight years, four wives, two Bette Fords, and twelve extra-marital affairs ago.

      • Arthur: To me, the most exciting part of sex is getting the bra off. After that it's just work.

      • Robbie: You're gonna be like everyone else, talkin' about how you hate L.A., like it's a prison camp with five area codes. How the people are so dumb, so plastic, so silicone. How nothing's open late, you have to drive to take a walk, the houses are ugly, the clothes are loud, the bagels are doughy, the pizza sucks, the murder trials last two years, the marriages last two months. Then you throw in earthquakes, aftershocks, mudslides, road rage, race riots, guns, tasers, pepper spray.... Just as your head's about to explode, boom. One warm afternoon you play softball and you think to yourself, 'My God, it's January.' Next day, you wake up, it's two years later, you've sold out every belief you ever held sacred. And you don't care, 'cause you're living way-too-happily-ever-after in a beach house waiting for your Guatemalan gardner like very other brain-dead southern Californian.
        Robbie: Ew, what is on this pastrami?
        Shrug: Raisins.
        Robbie: Oh yeah, I left that out.

      • Shrug: What was he driving?
        Robbie: A Honda.
        Jennifer: A Honda?
        Robbie: A Honda.
        Shrug: Maybe it was a rental.
        Robbie: I think it was his Honda.
        Shrug: Why would he drive a Honda?
        Jennifer: Maybe he does voice-overs for Honda.
        Robbie: Maybe he owns a Honda dealership.
        Shrug: Maybe it was his wife's Honda.
        Jennifer: Maybe he doesn't know it's a Honda.
        Shrug: Maybe it was an Acura Honda.
        Robbie: No, it was a Honda.

      • Robbie: Shrug's family has one of the largest private collections of money in the world.

      • Lauren: Why aren't you married?
        Arthur: Oh, that's a tough one, I don't know. Bad luck, bad timing, bad taste, taking the wrong subway on the wrong day, irreconcilable differences, thyroid problems, irreconcilable similarities, parents, parents... parents, jealousy, resentment, shyness, lesbians... oh, who the hell knows.

      • Lauren: My philosophy is, don't have a philosophy.
        Arthur: Well, you're young.
        Lauren: Yeah.

      • Shrug: It's guys like him that make America great.
        Robbie: Yes, he makes America great.
        Shrug: Not us.
        Robbie: No, we don't make America great. We make America pleasant.
        Shrug: Yes. And we get no credit for it.

      • Man on Plane: Hey, you're blocking my vision.
        Arthur Garment: I'm sorry, I didn't realize you were having a vision.

    • NOTES (2)

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