Jack & Jill

Season 1 Episode 11

Bad Timing and Dirty Laundry

Aired Unknown Jan 23, 2000 on The WB



  • Trivia

  • Quotes

    • Jill: Truth or dare?
      Jack: Truth.
      Jill: How'd you lose your virginity?
      Jack: I had sex.

    • Mrs. Zane: Have you thought about what you'll do in the event that things don't work out in the long run?
      Audrey: Well, actually I thought I'd snag a young medical student and get him to marry me before he realizes what a low-brow loser I am. Would you pass me the salt please?

    • Mrs. Zane: Lovely girl. Speaks three languages.
      Barto: And she's pretentious in all of them.

    • Jack: Thank you.
      Jill: For what?
      Jack: I don't know.
      Jill: You're welcome.

    • Elisa: I slept with a total stranger. I must have been insane.
      Mikey: He wasn't a stranger, you knew his name.
      Elisa: Only his first name.
      Mikey: Well, I always find that's the important one to know.

    • Mikey: We've all done it, Elisa. Even without the song. We're horny, we're lonely, mostly I think we're optimistic.

    • Jack: I spent the entire night in a laundry room. I am not leaving with dirty sheets.

    • Audrey: (To Barto) I don't care what your parents think about me. I care what they think YOU think about me.

    • Jack: Hey, try the window again.
      Jill: I will not try the window again. The window is made of kryptonite.

    • Jack: We could starve, or dehydrate or freeze to death.
      Jill: Or we could skip all that and just kill ourselves. You first.

    • Audrey: Are you kidding me? One apartment per floor?
      Barto: Yeah, it's less confusing that way.

    • Jill: Who keeps their cell-phone fully charged?
      Jack: I do!
      Jill: Where is it?
      Jack: In the charger.

    • Jill: (To Jack) It's like there's a little phys. ed. teacher inside your brain with a clipboard and a whistle.

    • Mikey: Through the eyes of Dr. and Mrs. Zane, some things just don't mix: religion and politics, martinis and hot dogs, precious sons in med school and blonde shiksa dancers...

    • Barto: Where did you come from?
      Audrey: Downstairs.

  • Notes

  • Allusions