Jim Rome is Burning

Season 1 Episode 18

December 10, 2003

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Aired Weekdays 4:30 PM Dec 10, 2003 on ESPN
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December 10, 2003
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Episode Summary

Incredibly enough, a few of you think that the BCS does work; that it's doing exactly what it's designed to do. I guess. If the system is designed to keep the best team in America out of it's championship game, then it's working perfectly. What's not to love about a system where number 2 plays number 3 for the right to be number 1? And just so I have this straight, USC isn't worthy of a Sugar Bowl bid because Hawaii lost to Boise St., but would have been worthy had Hawaii won that game? What?! Hey, BCS honks, your system has made college football the laughing stock of all sports. It's a joke. Mix in a playoff. And while we're on the topic, Oklahoma should not be playing in the Sugar Bowl. When you lose does matter. And no, I don't care how dominant they were over the course of the entire season. They're not even the best team in the Big-12 conference, how can they be the best team in America? And now would be a pretty good time to stop calling them the best team of all-time. The best team of all-time doesn't get jacked by four TD's by a team that lost at home to Marshall. Lebron James might be getting all the run and all the jack, but right now it's all about Melo, Carmelo Anthony. The Cavs, were brutal before Lebron showed up, and they're still brutal now that he's here. The Nuggets, on the other hand, are a force and Melo has changed the look of the entire franchise. He's an old school three. He can score, board, post up and step out and knock down the three. And right now, Lebron can't hold Melo's jock. And the sooner the Cavs take him off the ball, the better off he'll be. He's not a point. He's not the next Magic and you're doing the guy a real disservice by thinking he is. 2002 Olympic gold medalist Jamie Sale laid down for FHM magazine this month. And like everyone before her, said the only reason she did it was because it was "tastefully" done. I'm assuming Jamie, that you also had the requisite 'creative control' of the shoot as well? Memo to all celebrities who resort to this when their records no longer sell or their athletic careers are over: Tasteful nude shoots is a paradox, a contrast in terms. Get naked if you want, just don't tell me that it's tasteful. Skankful? Perhaps. But tasteful? No. Not a good week for rock legend Ozzy Osbourne. First, we found out that he was sexually molested as a youngster, and that his beloved wife Sharon got with fellow band member Randy Rhodes once back in the day. And no, I don't know if that's why he bit that head off that bat on stage or snorted all those ants off it. On top of that, some Beverly Hills quack had him taking 42 pills a day in an effort to overcome his drug addiction . And he topped it all off by getting jacked up in an ATVaccident. Drugged up, incoherent old rock stars and ATV's do not mix. Next time, hire a driver Ozzy…Shaaaarrrrron! The Orange Bowl is falling for giving us yet another Miami-Florida St. match-up. Look, I like FSU v. Miami as much as the next guy, but I don't need it 3 times in less than a year. Besides, don't we all know exactly how this one is going to go? The two teams will meet at mid-field for the pre game brawl. Canes QB Brock Berlin will turn it over a few times. Florida St. QB Chris Rix will double Berlins' turnover total and FSU will shank a last second field goal and lose. Been there, done that. Britney Spears filed for a restraining order against a 41-year old Japanese man this week in 2002. Not to make light of a stalker and his fascination with something he could never have, but showing up naked and gyrating on the cover of nearly every magazine in the world is not the best way to throw freaks off the scent. If she showed up wearing more than a piece of dental floss on the cover of those mags, there might be fewer 41-year old pervs thinking that can catch up to that. Uber-bust Gigli was released on DVD this week. Meanwhile, Ben Affleck says his career has stalled because of his relationship with J-Lo. That the media and public's fascination with them has killed his box office aura. Yeah either that or the fact that your movies are unwatchable, slick. One or the other. The fact that you've been gravy-training your boy Matt Damon is also not helping your cred. I know I'll be getting my copy of Gigli this week. I'm going to slam it right between my copies of Ishtar and Water World. And for the record, Ben, it's not J-Lo, it's your inability to act. This year's Super Bowl has a nice twist, some geniuses are going to counter-program against the halftime show with the Lingerie Bowl. A pay-per-view, 7 on 7 tackle football game with lingerie models in their underwear. Team Euphoria is going to get it on with Team Dream. Football game or soft core porn film - you make the call. Team Euphoria's coach, Lawrence Taylor, said "It's all about having good clean fun." Of course, LT thought smoking crack on game day was 'good clean fun'. Is he going to send any male strippers to Team Dream's running back's room before the big game? Tough call, 20 bones for 7 on 7 skankball, or Gloria Gaynor, ZZ Top or whoever the Super Bowl has for free? I think I'll set aside the 20 bucks just to be on the safe side.moreless
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