Keen Eddie

Season 1 Episode 13

Liberté, Égalité, Fraternité

Aired Unknown Apr 14, 2004 on FOX



  • Trivia

  • Quotes

    • Eddie: Why don't you do something really funny. Maybe push a handicapped kid down a stairwell in his wheelchair.

    • (Last lines for the series)
      Fiona: What's wrong?
      Eddie: Nothing.

    • (Jacques aims a gun at Michel's head)
      Jacques: You know, in this gun, there are bullets.
      Dominique: Please...
      Jacques: On your chart, my friend. Do you know what today says? Today, is your lucky day.
      (Jacques takes the gun away and walks out the room)

    • Michel: Do you believe in fate?
      Jacques: I think I do.

    • (Jacques is examining Michel's gun)
      Jacques: There are no bullets in it. You don't carry a gun with no bullets. You may have to use it.

    • (Fiona picks up a bowl and is ready to throw it at Eddie)
      Eddie: Wait!
      (She holds back)
      Eddie: It's yours, go ahead.
      (Eddie runs away as Fiona throws the bowl)

    • (Fiona damages her car)
      Eddie: Nice work on the car.
      Fiona: (serious) You think that's funny?
      Eddie: Did anybody get hurt?
      Fiona: No, thank God.
      Eddie: Then it's funny.

    • (Pippin loses Michel but Eddie has already seen Michel leave)
      Eddie: Arlette.
      Pippin: Michel is gone.
      Eddie: Yeah, thanks Sherlock.

    • Anton: You know what's wrong Eddie? Nothing. Remember, there's nothing wrong. Ever.

    • Anton: (to Michel) It's not my destiny to die tonight. Is it yours?

    • Eddie: So there's nothing in the soup?
      Fiona: Oh, there's something in the soup.
      Eddie: Okay, what is in the soup Fiona?
      Fiona: Love. (uneasy) I mean, love because I'm happy about the...
      Eddie: The contract. Yeah. Sure.

    • Eddie: What's in the soup?
      Fiona: Wouldn't you like to know.
      Eddie: Yes I would, so I could seek the proper medical attention.

    • (After Eddie cancels Fiona's trip to Italy)
      Eddie: I'm sorry. But you did deserve it.

    • Pippin: Hello Carol.
      Carol: Inspector.
      Eddie: Miss Moneypenny.
      Carol: Detective.
      Eddie: What are you looking for?
      Carol: (slowly) A really good spanking.

    • Anton: Come on, my friend. I insist. Stick around. Have a drink.
      Eddie: No. I insist.
      Anton: Okay, I accept.
      Eddie: Accept what?
      Anton: You tell me.
      Eddie: Tell you what?
      Anton: What will you have to drink.

    • Frank: Yes, I drove him.
      Eddie: Where?
      Frank: You'll have to check the Driver's log book for that.
      Eddie: Where's the Driver's log book?
      Frank: I can remember if ahh... you paid me this.
      (Frank writes '40' on a piece of paper, Pippin goes to pay him but Eddie stops him)
      Eddie: Okay, wait a minute. This is it. You're either with the bad guys and you keep protecting them or you're with the good guys and you level with us right now. What's it gonna be Frank?
      (Frank reaches for a book that was in front of him the whole time)

    • Frank: Okay, I might've driven the person you're after, to a certain location you're after. I can ahh... remember if you paid me this.
      (Frank writes a '40' on a piece of paper)
      Eddie: You wanna go to jail, Frank, for shaking down a police officer?
      (Pippin throw some money in front of Frank)
      Eddie: What are you doing?
      Pippin: It's okay, okay. It's going to come back to us some day.

    • Frank: (to Eddie) Are you wired?
      Eddie: Why do you keep asking me that?
      Frank: If you are wired, you gotta tell me if I ask you. That's the law and I know the law.
      Pippin: Yeah, no Frank that... that's not the law.
      Frank: It's not?
      Pippin: No.
      Frank: Are you wearing a wire?
      Eddie and Pippin: No!

    • Frank: Are you wired?
      Eddie: No, Frank. (shows a picture of Anton Levy) Now did you drive this guy from Heathrow yesterday or not?
      Frank: Sorry gents, can't answer that. Client-Driver privilege.
      Pippin: Yeah Frank, that's lawyers and doctors. There's no such thing as Client-Driver privilege.
      Frank: Oh.

    • Eddie: Are you in?
      Pippin: (laughs) You look like Steve McQueen when you said that.
      Eddie: I didn't ask if you were gay, I asked if you were in.
      Pippin: I am.
      Eddie: You're a brave man. I encourage you to follow your path and congratulations, today is a very big day for you.

    • Pippin: Anton Levy. He doesn't care if you hold a badge, he doesn't care if you're elected official, I don't think he cares if you're a blood relative, he just... he goes through people. He doesn't go around people.

    • Fiona: You pretended to be a doctor and called my work and left a message saying I was positive for a venereal disease. Yes, you did. You started it.
      Eddie: Yeah, I guess I did. So how are you... coping with that?

    • Fiona: What were you doing on the subway in the first place?
      Eddie: Because I lost the keys to Pippin's car that I borrowed last night.
      Fiona: (sheepishly) I know.
      Eddie: How do you know?
      Fiona: Because I hid them.
      Eddie: You what?
      Fiona: Well, I'm leaving for Italy tommorrow and I thought it would be funny to leave with you hunting around looking for them, so I hid them.
      (she takes the keys out of a tin can)
      Fiona: But I was going to tell you... later... this week.
      Eddie: Why don't you do something really funny. Maybe push a handicapped kid down a stairwell in his wheelchair.

  • Notes

  • Allusions

    • Title: Liberté, Égalité, Fraternité

      The title is a reference to the motto of the French Republic.

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