King of The Hill Season 4 Episode 21

Dale: I just wanted to apologize for beating you up last night.
John Redcorn: You didn't beat me up. You hit me with a lamp.

Dale: I was at John... uhh, at the gun club, playing Russian Roulette.
Nancy: Awww, did you win?
Dale: You're not really familiar with the game, are you?

Dale: Boy, if they gave an Olympic medal in sexual gymnastics, I would've taken home the silver last night.

Bill: I thought you were withholding intimacy to preserve your life-force.
Dale: I was, but then Hank had to go draggin' me and the old lady to some Italian Romanceria. Next thing you know, we're on our second honeymoon. Only this time, no cruise ship and I only vomited once.
(Nancy overhears)
Dale: I think I finally got to the point where I actually love her more than my mother.

Dale: (to Nancy) Are you sure you're not an alien? 'Cause you just abducted my heart!

Peggy: Nancy, now you know my position on monogamy... I am in favor of it.

Peggy: (To Hank, concerning Nancy & Dale)You know she only sleeps with him on his birthday and Christmas. That's why she always gets depressed around the holidays.

Dale:(Speaking to Hank about Nancy) Boy, her 'can' looks so sexy when she's walking away, it's almost a shame she's gonna turn around and come back.

Nancy: (to Dale) Oh! I forgot you have brown eyes. They're so cute, and close together.