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Bobby signs up for Peer Counselling in order to try and find a girl. When he is told he isn't allowed to give any advice or date any of the clients, he has a hard time following the rules. One of the clients who he gives advice to winds up falling for Bobby and starts stalking him. Hank, thinking Bobby chose Auto Shop, takes his friends to go find a fixer-upper of a car for Bobby.moreless
Connie is turned down for admission to a prestigious summer school because it already has too many overachieving Asian kids. Realizing that working hard and overachieving will never help them get ahead in life, Kahn and Minh decide to give up and live like beer-drinking, El Camino-driving rednecks.
When Hank suffers a back injury at work and none of his doctors can fix it, he tries the healing powers of yoga. At first, he finds it a little too wacky, but thanks to the help of Yogi Victor, he realizes that it actually works. Hank's insurance company sets out to prove that his worker's compensation claim is false. Peggy becomes the new bagger at Pink & White.moreless
Hank is outraged when he finds out that the Texas State Fair Grill-Off doesn't allow grilling with propane. Luanne, who wants to be treated like an adult, offers to help Hank organize a grilling protest. Luanne enlists the help of college protesters, which so appalls Hank that he kicks her off the protest. Determined to prove herself, Luanne climbs up into Big Tex, the State Fair's giant mascot, and continues protesting on her own. Peggy, Nancy and Minh try to visit a house where a famous murder took place, but the real estate agent is only letting in potential buyers. Dale, Bill and Boomhauer replace Hank with Bobby as the leader of the gang.moreless
After reviewing Bobby's new History textbook, Hank discovers that the story of the Alamo has been replaced. Hank teams up with Bruce Tuttle, an aspiring writer-director, to stage a re-enactment of the Battle of the Alamo, but Bruce creates a revisionist version of the story. Peggy tries to use Flat Stanley to teach safety rules to children.moreless
Dale is trying to set up his new neighborhood security company, Daletech, but no one seems interested. When Cotton becomes the local auxiliary police officer, Dale comes up with a plan to stop him from being the protector of the neighborhood. Hank tries to get Kahn to put up a privacy fence in front of his bathroom. Hank also notices that things in his house keep moving or disappearing. To make Cotton feel important, and stop him from annoying everyone, he puts him on the case.moreless
When a flood threatens the town, the Arlenites gather in the communal shelter: The Tom Landry Middle School gym. Hank is supposed to be in charge, but while he's delayed at the town's hydroelectric dam debating over whether or not to open the floodgates, Bill blunders his way into a leadership role. He finds power and adoration of the masses and soon becomes a tinpot dictator. After Hank gets to the school and reveals he opened the flood causes a lot of homes to flood, everyone turns on him and Bill uses his power to lock him up. Kahn wants to have power so he becomes Bill's right-hand man. Bobby, Joseph and Connie get keys and go wild in the yearbook office. Peggy sleeps away the flood. Dale schemes to build an ark to float his family to safety.moreless
When NHRA driver John Force needs an organ transplant, Dale is the only one who can save him. Hank encourages Dale to ignore his fear of hospitals and give up his kidney to save Force. Dale reluctantly agrees, but only if Hank takes his place being Dale for the day, a task that consists of outlandish duties. When it is revealed that Force doesn't need a kidney, Hank has to decide whether the already extracted kidney should go to a 10 year old boy. Bobby takes over the morning announcements and Peggy becomes his side kick to help him seem funnier.moreless
Peggy volunteers to help with the school cheerleading squad, in order to get them to learn some cheers to motivate the football team, instead of just doing dances. Peggy soon finds out that even her cheers don't work, but violence does. The cheerleader squad starts beating up Bobby dressed as the various mascots of the other schools, but they take it too far, when one mascot is the Fighting Irish, and Irish representatives are at the game.moreless
Hank takes Bobby on a camping trip that he is going on with the guys in which they vow to eat only what they catch, in order to teach Bobby self-relience. A very hungry Bobby befriends the campers next to them, who are a group of hippies. After they feed him, the hippies run out of their supply, and come to Bobby for repayment. Dale and Boomhauer leave, and Bill joins the hippies. Back at home, Peggy starts helping people around town, who don't actually need her help.moreless
Luanne, drops out of college to do hair again, much to the disappointment of Peggy. She lands a job at the hippest hair salon in Arlen, "Hottyz". Not able to afford it all herself she brings Bill aboard. But to land the coveted spots, they make some major changes. Changes that don't sit too well with their friends and families, or themselves after awhile.moreless
When Rich gets hired on at Strickland Propane, Hank goes out of his way to welcome him into the Strickland family. Rich starts to test the waters, with some off-color jokes and comments, and gets a positive reaction from the employees. Everyone except Hank finds this new employee hilarious, and when things go too far, he seeks out an attorney who recommends that Hank file a sexual harassment suit against Strickland Propane. Dale quits smoking, and takes up chewing tobacco.moreless
When Hank asks Peggy to design an art piece for Strickland Propane, she creates the "Probot", a statue made out of propane tanks. Her sculpture is rejected by the city board, but picked up by an art dealer from Dallas. Unfortunately, Peggy finds out that the dealer presents her to the public as an uneducated hillbilly. Dale starts wearing a suit of armor and uses his new found invincibility to insult people without consequences.moreless
After becoming inquisitive about how much money the family makes, Bobby decides that he will do some investigating of his own. Bobby overhears part of a conversation where Hank says he made a thousand dollars that day, and thinks he makes a thousand dollars everyday. He also comes across a box marked "oil records" in the garage and misinterprets it. Feeling that Hank is just being a rich miser, he goes on a shopping spree with Hank's emergency credit card. News of Hank's hidden wealth spreads through the alley and out about town, and everyone wants in on the action.moreless
Hank needs to take some antique furniture to his mother in Arizona, so he rents an 18-wheeler and takes Bobby on a road trip. Dale, Bill and Boomhauer stow away in the back. At a truck stop, they meet several tough truckers who scoff at Hank for claiming to be a real trucker, especially once Dale, Bill, and Boomhauer are found. Hank falls asleep and Bobby and the gang think they better keep driving to make up for lost time, but they wind up on a mountain, and Hank has to figure a way to get down. Peggy and Luanne try to write a Christmas novelty song based on Hank and Bobby's travels.moreless
Hank has signed up for the "Parade of Homes" but just days before it is discovered he has mold in his house. The company in charge of clearing it away keeps making it seem as if the mold is getting worse and worse. Hank can no longer take it, and decides to get revenge.moreless
The actor who plays TV's "Monsignor Martinez" invites Peggy to Mexico City to tutor his children for an English-language exam. In Mexico, Peggy starts to suspect that her suave employer might be hitting on her. Luanne takes on Peggy's duties at home, with little success.
Hank wants to put Bobby on testosterone pills but the doctor refuses. Peggy hears that the pills are given to men who are low on energy and going through male PMS, which describes Hank as of late, due to stress at work. She secretly starts drugging him. Peggy is also on the committee for a bull run and Hank, now full of excess energy, agrees to help fundraise and run with the bulls. Bobby is afraid of showering after Gym.moreless
A former Dallas Cowboy 'Big' Willie Lane, moves into the neighborhood. Hank becomes so star-struck, that he forgets all about his duties as "Block Captain", bending and breaking the rules to accommodate his idol. When things go too far, Hank teams up with Kahn and starts trying to get rid of Willie.moreless
Fearing that Bobby is succumbing to bad influences, Hank makes him join a local Christian youth group. Bobby discovers that the group consists of cool kids and their tattooed pastor, Pastor K, who worship God through skateboarding and rock n' roll. Hank approves of Bobby's new found interest in religion, but disapproves of the way Bobby starts to dress and talk. When Bobby gets his ear pierced, Hank forbids Bobby to attend the big Christian rock festival, Messiahfest. Bill, Boomhauer, Dale and Kahn decide that death row convicts shouldn't be the only ones to get great meals, so they create the Last Meal Club, dedicated to creating perfect 'last meals' for themselves.moreless
Boomhauer's brother, Patch, is engaged to a girl who Boomhauer used to date, and still has feelings for. When Patch hits on Luanne, Boomhauer gets upset and they get in a fight and Boomhauer quits as best man, and Hank takes over. When prostitutes (hired by Patch), show up at the bachelor party, everyone accuses Boomhauer of trying to break up the wedding.moreless
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