King of The Hill

Gordon: Ah, now, this is a beer. Why can't America make a decent ale? Hank: Probably because we're too busy making medical breakthroughs and blockbuster movies and going to the moon! Gordon: Yeah, well, we invented zippers, penicillin and the Zamboni! Bill: I love Canada's national anthem. Too bad they don't play it much at the Olympics! Kahn: And your money has a girl on it!

Ollie: So how tall are you? Bobby: 4 Foot 11. Ollie: Cool; that's like, 157 centimeters. Bobby: Wow; I sound taller in Canada! I wonder if it makes me thinner, too...

Bobby: Mom, can I have another half liter of OJ, please? Hank: What? Bobby, we speak English in this house. Bobby: But, Dad, Canada's metric system makes so much more sense. A yard, a foot, an ounce... That's so random. Why not measure things in squirts and dog's tails?

Kahn: If you ask me, America's building a wall along the wrong border!

(Hank has gotten all of the regulars personalized beer mugs that he will keep frosty, and let's Gordon use Boomhauers. Bill and Dale start singing the theme to Alamo Beer) Gordon: Well, I guess it's a fine beer, you know, if you're not into flavor, but you love going to the washroom all night (Gordon laughs). Oh, sorry. Maureen's giving me our secret signal to leave. Good to meet all you.

Suzette: Allo, my name is Suzette. I live next door. Boomhauer: Dang ol Bon Jour, man.

Hank: Be polite, Dale. We're Americans. We're the world's Welcome Mat. It doesn't matter if they're from Canada, Laos, or God forbid, California...

Dale: I'm thinkin' a new hammock. For me, laying and swaying is like a morphine drip without the risk of renal failure.

Hank: Ah, summer. What America does best. Heck, we were BORN in summer.

Hank: Boomhauer, don't you dare come back a hockey fan.