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Hank discovers that he is not a native Texan: he was actually born in New York City, when Cotton took his wife there as part of a plot to kill Fidel Castro. When Hank confronts his father about this, Cotton offers to help Hank become a "real Texan." But it turns out that Cotton is just making Hank the fall guy for yet another Castro-killing scheme.moreless

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    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions

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    • TRIVIA (4)

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    • QUOTES (10)

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      • Peggy: Hank, when you were a child did your parents ever say you were adopted? Hank: How do I even know that's my name? My real parents probably named me Henry or Chris, oh God Peggy; what if I'm a Chris?

      • Cotton: ...And at midnight, we rendezvous in Mexico with one Jorge Lopez. As you know, he's half-Mexican, half-Cuban. For this job, we'll be using the half that's Cuban.

      • Cotton: Well, Fidel, you should've stayed in Washington on your unofficial visit. Now they're gonna have to carry you off on a seventh-inning stretcher!

      • Boomhauer: Yep. Bill: Yep. Dale: Yep. Or should I say "yada yada yada?" Hank, should I? Hank: Shut up, Dale. Bill: Boy, you New Yorkers really are rude.

      • Peggy: Hank, informed sources tell me that you were dead in the water, and then you came back to life. So you were reborn in Texas. Meaning you are a native Texan. Hank: No, I'm not a native Texan. I'm just a Texan. Peggy: And I am a Texan too. Hank: I don't remember seeing any Montana flag at the Alamo. Peggy: Well, it wasn't a state then. Hank: Fine, everybody's a Texan. Change planes in Dallas, you're a Texan.

      • Cotton: Fine, you sissy girls, I'll row to Cuba myself! Hell, I'll swim to Cuba with this wrench between my teeth! Then I'll pose as a beautiful female plumber, and when the toilet clogs at the Presidential palace, I'll... I'll... oh. I just wanted to kill Castro! Hank: I know, Dad. I know.

      • Stinky: It's starting to drizzle. Cotton: Aw, suck it up, Stinky. Rained for seventeen days at Guadalcanal, I didn't hear you complain then. Stinky: I complained a lot.

      • Hank: I'm pretty sure the license people are gonna need to see a birth certificate. Otherwise you'd have a bunch of Oklahomans trying to get Native Texan license plates.

      • Cotton: Is that a kiwi in there? You know how I feel about hairy fruits!

      • Hank: Dad, you can't kill Castro. You shouldn't even be driving at night.

    • NOTES (2)

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    • ALLUSIONS (1)

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      • Seinfeld Dale: ...or should I say 'Yadda, Yadda, Yadda'? Should I, Hank? Dale is referring to the show Seinfeld which is credited for coining the phrase 'yadda yadda yadda' to mean 'whatever'. Since everyone is ribbing Hank about being born in New York and 'Seinfeld' is based on Jerry Seinfeld's life in New York, it's a nice little dig.

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