Brian McCann |
Preparation-H Raymond/Various |
Conan O'Brien |
Host |
Joel Godard |
Announcer |
Max Weinberg |
Music Director |
Kevin Nealon |
Himself |
Guest Star |
David Gray |
Musical Performer |
Guest Star |
Denis Leary |
Himself |
Recurring Role |
Conan Hates My Homeland
Ireland: You know there's a wonderful, old Irish legend that goes something like this: "Once upon a time, many years ago there was an Irishmen who could hold down a job."
Israel: Hey! Remember when life in Israel was vibrant and carefree? Man, that was the day.
Italy: The newspapers are reporting a miracle - apparently a statue of Mary moved her hand and said, "I just worked harder than eighty percent of your workforce."
Jamaica: Of coarse you've got an astronomical murder rate - you've had "No Woman, No Cry" on repeat for twenty-five years.
Japan: Last century you brutally defeated China and Russia, this century you make "Hello Kitty" toasters.
Conan: [Commenting after a tourism tip] You gotta keep your eye on Jesus. He's an untrustworthy guy. We'll get letters...
Conan: In Oklahoma, listen to this story it's interesting. A Native American woman is suing the Cherokee Nation because they won't recognize her lesbian marriage. Yeah, the woman also said she wants to take her partner's Indian name, 'She who wears toolbelt.'
Conan: It was reported today that an anti-Hilary Clinton web site has only been able to raise twelve thousand dollars. When asked why Bill Clinton said, "That's all I had."
Conan: Yesterday President Bush left for an extended vacation. President Bush is planning to relax and take it easy at his ranch for five weeks. That's true yeah, which is why President Bush's new Secret Service codename is 'Kevin Federline.' Just relax, have some beers, wear a backwards baseball cap and enjoy.
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Sunday
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Monday
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Tuesday
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