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Late Night with Conan O'Brien

Season 12 Episode 9

Donald Trump, Wayne Brady, Crossfade

Aired Weekdays 12:35 AM Sep 14, 2004 on NBC
out of 10
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Episode Summary

Donald Trump, Wayne Brady, Crossfade
Donald Trump, Wayne Brady, Crossfade. Comedy bits included "Celebrity Survey" and an out of towner on a cell phone interrupts the show.

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    Wayne Brady

    Wayne Brady


    Guest Star



    Musical Performers

    Guest Star

    Donald Trump

    Donald Trump


    Recurring Role

    Trivia, Notes, Quotes and Allusions


    • TRIVIA (0)

    • QUOTES (4)

      • Conan: You're one of the country's richest people, yet you don't carry cash when you walk around, do you have an ATM card?
        Donald Trump: I don't... I've never used an ATM actually, I've never really used one but I don't carry cash. I used to go to the teller and you'd give a book and they'd give it back and they'd put some money in the book and that'd be the end of it, now they have ATMs.
        Conan: Yeah, there've been ATMs since like 1978.
        Donald Trump: I've never used them.
        Conan: It used to be you'd go there and you'd say, "Mary Lou, I wanna write the check."

      • Conan: Now is your life a hell now, because where ever you go, people walk up to you and say, "Haha you're fired!" That must get old.
        Donald Trump: Well you know who I really get... when I look at your audience they sort of knew who I am, I know who they are but the little kids that are six and seven years old - they run up to you on Fifth Avenue and say "You're fired! You're fired!" and they run away and they laugh and they have such a good time. So its a whole new audience.
        Conan: Well then you have your goons beat them, so it all works out.

      • Conan: Celebrities are good looking, they're funny, they're successful - sometimes all three baby check it out!

      • Celebrity Survey
        "As a child I didn't get enough..."
        Jessica Simpson's Survey Response: "oxygen to my brain."

        "I prepared for a life in politics by..."
        Senator John Edwards' Survey Response: "modeling casual wear for J.C. Penney's."

        "I trained my dog to..."
        Ruben Studdard's Survey Response: "butter itself and then leap into my mouth."

        "In the end, this election will be decided by..."
        President George W. Bush's Survey Response: "my brother, Jeb."

        "The secret to a lasting relationship is..."
        Jennifer Lopez's Survey Response: "not marrying me."

        "Despite my fame and fortune, I still do all my own..."
        O.J. Simpson's Survey Response: "murdering."

        "On my last vacation, I..."
        Vice-President Dick Cheney's Survey Response: "went down to Georgia, I was looking for a soul to steal. I was in a bind, 'cause I was way behind, and I was willin' to make a deal...now, you play a pretty good fiddle, boy, but give the devil his due. I'll bet a fiddle of gold against your soul 'cause I think I'm better than you."

        "My biggest hero when I was growing up was..."
        Mike Tyson's Survey Response: "this guy in my neighborhood who went broke and bit people's ears off."

        "If I were a tree, I'd be..."
        Senator John Kerry's Survey Response: "the kind of tree that would serve with distinction in Vietnam."

        "People always instantly recognize my..."
        Paris Hilton's Survey Response: "vagina."

        "If I were a dog, I would be..."
        Senator Zell Miller's Survey Response: "shot by Animal Control."

        "My advice to parents..."
        Michael Jackson's Survey Response: "shut up and take the $2 million."

    • NOTES (0)

    • ALLUSIONS (0)

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